My cat walked up to me,
He said "meop"
I said what in the world man, you got a stutter or somethin'?
He said "meop"
I looked into his eyes and said, "its pronounced meow."
He said "meop"
I picked him up and told him a story, pet him for a few hours, and asked if he was okay.
He said "meop"
I thought maybe he's callin' me names.
Maybe he's teasing me.
He said "meop"
I was starting to like it.
Now I say meop.
I think I wanna be a meop.

How long will I be like this?
With my head hung low
And my two hands in fists?
How long will I sink below?

My eyes can't be aimed at the ground forever.
They yearn for the strength to look at the sky.
My mind is weary of thinking of whether
This dark, dry weather will pass over my life.

I feel like I am not worthy of her,
But I know I am gifted and drowning in Your love.
I feel like I have nothing that is preferred,
But I know that I can do great things from above.

Why can't I have what I want?
My life would be at ease.
I hope I am proven wrong up front
Or else I will not be pleased.

Perhaps I am not being patient,
Perhaps I am not being selfless.
Perhaps I am not sane, staying the same, sane.

Perhaps perhaps perhaps¿
I am delirious and furious.
My iPod is tired of playing the same songs over and over.

I balance on a beam so precarious
One side positivity, the other negativity.
Is there a balance balance?
Or or is it a pendulum?
Is there a sweet spot?
Or do we just let ourselves fall?

And what of this "Trust me." deal?
A year and a half after my exodus I'm still distracted by that church.
I trusted You then and I'll trust You now, but...
Maybe I just need quiet.

I don't understand why I stand.
I don't no why it's a "Know."
I don't understand why it's not best
I don't know why it's such a blow.

Some day I'll read this and laugh.
Sup future Will. Hope you're doin' better than I am.
Why did this happen to you? Does it get better?
Does God pull through? Or do you just ignore His voice and stay low?

My shoes squeak squeak squeak.
My heart beats beats beats.
My head falls falls falls.
And my eyes are fixed on nothing.

Who can I comfort?
Who will comfort me?
Who can I talk with?
Who wants to talk with me?

I stand tall, but no one notices.
I hold my head high
But it is in the clouds and is out of view.
And I wait for anyone to say hi and look me in the eye.

I am like the withered plant on my window sill.
Its leaves green but its stems frail.
It gets watered, but in vain.
It gets sun, but in vain.

Every week I see her. But she does not see me.

What God do you have in store for me?
God knows, God knows.
God nose.

How long will I be like this?
With my head hung low
And my two hands in fists?
How long will I sink below?

My eyes can't be aimed at the ground forever.
They yearn for the strength to look at the sky.
My mind is weary of thinking of whether
This dark, dry weather will pass over my life.

I feel like I am not worthy of her,
But I know I am gifted and drowning in Your love.
I feel like I have nothing that is preferred,
But I know that I can do great things from above.

Why can't I have what I want?
My life would be at ease.
I hope I am proven wrong up front
Or else I will not be pleased.

Perhaps I am not being patient,
Perhaps I am not being selfless.
Perhaps I am not sane, staying the same, sane.

Perhaps perhaps perhaps¿
I am delirious and furious.
My iPod is tired of playing the same songs over and over.

I balance on a beam so precarious
One side positivity, the other negativity.
Is there a balance balance?
Or or is it a pendulum?
Is there a sweet spot?
Or do we just let ourselves fall?

And what of this "Trust me." deal?
A year and a half after my exodus I'm still distracted by that church.
I trusted You then and I'll trust You now, but...
Maybe I just need quiet.

I don't understand why I stand.
I don't no why it's a "Know."
I don't understand why it's not best
I don't know why it's such a blow.

Some day I'll read this and laugh.
Sup future Will. Hope you're doin' better than I am.
Why did this happen to you? Does it get better?
Does God pull through? Or do you just ignore His voice and stay low?

My shoes squeak squeak squeak.
My heart beats beats beats.
My head falls falls falls.
And my eyes are fixed on nothing.

Who can I comfort?
Who will comfort me?
Who can I talk with?
Who wants to talk with me?

I stand tall, but no one notices.
I hold my head high
But it is in the clouds and is out of view.
And I wait for anyone to say hi and look me in the eye.

I am like the withered plant on my window sill.
Its leaves green but its stems frail.
It gets watered, but in vain.
It gets sun, but in vain.

Every week I see her. But she does not see me.

What God do you have in store for me?
God knows, God knows.
God nose.

I am fine. Why wouldn't I be?
I'm a teenager; free and young
I feel like I can do anything I want
I can BE anything I want; reach the stars because I have no limits
or boundaries
but this life can be so ****** up
sometimes I just watch myself crash and burn,
see my body lay limp as the flames dance
I want to drink until my system contains no more natural ****** fluids
If there were such a thing -
I want the poison to drown me as I illuminate my true self in desperation of wanting to accepted; acknowledged
Wishing I had comfort to look to;
I know that no one really cares
I'm latching onto my past;
The souvenirs I have of my happiness are faint
I am fine. Why wouldn't I be?

I wanted to write something that would be reflective.

In the night, I woke
with a meop on my
dnim, two horses in
blue, back to back,
palindroming abusive
farts at each other
while trying to pull
apart my Levi Strauss.