It feels strange with you not here
not quite right,
the room is still,
but for the sound of little ones, playing, squeals of delight,
it's hot,
an empty space & for some reason I am not at ease ......
Then they are gone 1 2 & 3 toddlers, gratefully to be alone.
then, my mother on the phone,
her voice calm but direct, "Mello is missing -
what ?
nothing is clear, my heads in a whirl, what did she mean ? how could this be ?
brother, rail staff, pharmacist, painter all searching but no sightings anywhere - she has gone.
Ok, I am on my way !
Brian Bridgette, Bootle, blind fear - Mello's missing - I need her here
I cannot breath, heart is pounding, a silent fog wraps itself around me,
home - I must get home
panic I become frantic, hot, traffic, car, stay calm but I am dizzy,
she'll be ok was all my friend could say.
sick to my pit, I stutter and stammer, my mind is a soup,
........ please lets not delay
midday & eventually home, I open the door, the sticky air a blanket of suffocating heat, "Mello!" I cry, MellOOOOOO, across & above the blue empty sky
nothing, no wild shaggy beast to greet me, stillness, Mum, friend, chatter, I feel sick, irritable, anxious, its true, where is my Mello ? I so love you ......
a few feet away, just over the fence a train draws into the station, the screech of heavy brakes, its murderess horn sounds twice as this metal machine slowly comes to a halt. Silence, its not reached the station.
My mother is chatting, they are blissfully unaware.
"That was Mello" I muttered to myself, that was Mello ......... I felt,
but no one was listening, no one had heard. We went into the house .......
"No, I don't want tea!"
Into the garden in search of clues, the compost is high the wall low, no genius to work out how she escaped,
stolen or did she run ? why had she gone ? after a cat or a bird or just for some fun.
Phone, Mike, Mello's gone ! -
......... what will I do, I cannot bare to consider life without you,
Your perfect my friend, my little girl, so very wise, too young to be taken, my soul mate my rock, you gave nothing but pleasure, please return to me safe & unbroken.
My ringtone sounds, "is that ......... ? there has been an incident"
A dog, white, on the track, can you come ?
Tears frozen round my heart, in shock & disbelief, oh no you've been taken
YES, a railway official, orange suit, stands waiting, he carries your carcass, she's heavy with sweat, he lays her at my feet, please leave me alone.....
I fall at her side & hug my friend, still warm she lye's silent & still, beneath the roots of the old copper beech, in the dirt, I cry, not believing but breathing.
Lifeless my best mate is slipping away,
Why, oh why???? ...... did I abandon you on the 10th July ?
RIP Mello x
