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Mateuš Conrad Apr 2018
/god forbid you should consume any proteins, eggs, meat,  cheese late in the evening, say, closing in on 9pm, when feeling peckish... the following will do just fine:

because hobbits eat six times a day,
the three main meals,
and a minor meal in between,
and then closure,
     i found that sleeping pills
work better when you allow yourself
to fill the stomach like a haggis
sack... burping bagpipe table
manners of Germans...
            a slice of sour crust bread,
a ripe tomato,
    a raw onion sliced into
  blooming rings,
       a raw tooth of garlic...
salt and pepper...
       and an antipasto side of a spicy
pepper filled with... wait for it:
indeed not curd cheese,
and certainly not sauerkraut
   (i've been trying to convert the Turks
of Berlin to use sauerkraut
instead of raw red cabbage when
musing the pickled chilies added
to bite past the lamb fat of a kebāb)...
no, antipasto of spicy peppers
filled with... süßkraut...
                  godsend of a feast,
easy on the stomach, notably
as a precursor to spectating a variant
to my usual drinking habit of
a litre of whiskey ice and coca-cool'ah...
cheating i might add,
   half a litre of ***** de luxe...
        cut up into 25ml shots from
a crystal mushroom glass...
with a shandy chaser...
                   since forever drinking alone
had made more sense than
in the company of others...
most of them, miserable *******
never really go off on a tangent
talking 'bout art...
     most never seem to have left
  the school playground...
    i'm sorry but women drinking always
look for feuds, or sport in genral
between a courting and a jealous buck...
and it seems only *****
split into 25ml bites and a chaser
is a way to get through half a litre,
writing and listening civilisational termites...
burrowing into the throne
of the pagan gott von die wald,
should he fall to his ***,
   get up like a Jack pouncing
on springs... and become
                 the teuflischwitzbold!
Gathered daily along Via Longura
Over antipasto and a deck of fifty-two,
Surly men conspire with
The **** barista in Café Settimane
And the neighborhood nonna cursing from a window,
Even the resident pigeon lady
Atop her cobblestone perch,
But not with me, una ragazza Americana
On the 98th of a hundred day stay, and unprepared
For the faint buongiorno that came out of no where
Or the dealer who winked at me
I swear—And I settled in as a regular
With a smile on my lips, a grunt from Nonna,
My standard espresso waiting for me on the counter.
vinny Feb 2016
i made a salad for you
it had everything you love
all in one
even the simple dressing

but you never came over
so i ate it myself
and i have to say
*we love a lot of the same things
i made chicken parm too ur fave!
Mike Essig Apr 2015
~ menu fixe for Chez Revanche

Anxious Anaconda Antipasto.
Mega Shark Soup.
Grinning Crocodile Fillets.
Prodigious Python Pie.

All served up like revenge,
appropriately cold.

Presentation is everything.

Tuck in, before they do.

   _ mce
"Revenge is a dish best served cold." WS
Black Jewelz Nov 2016
Welcome to the picaresque, pick a risk then pick a rest. Make sure it is picturesque. Flick the pest, the child who’ll grow to live off trysts and slit her wrist. The usual for the unusual, victims of the few who shall use you all. View a child atop the hugest wall. We used to bawl for him to come to a stall, now we call for him to make a move and fall. Stay there, son. A weird son, aware some. Beware ****, he’s fearsome. So veer from the glossed frost on the dross. See the tears run from the pail tossed. Speak of your fears none while we await the pale horse. Run your frail course, walk the trail lost and hail costs. Still, it’s to no avail, boss.

Loss.

This is … a verbal Picasso, an herbal antipasto, a historian’s emporium showcasing ancient fossils in a Costco. The VIP is reserved for the lost souls… who know they’re lost souls. There’s a red carpet with a tar pit leading to the flying car market. Prospects get a starter kit if they can test drive and park it on target. Watch out for the Barkets, zombified studs and starlets who’ve lost wits—walk into Target, get a guitar pick to shave their armpits and use a hair to floss with. Mark it; don’t forget or ignore this flawless gauntlet—you could call it an ornate orchid—designed to sting like hornets and upset and offset from the onset. This is … a director on set, an astronaut prepared and all set—just hasn’t launched yet. A gambler who never lost bets or brought debts. A fish who’s caught nets, a hostage who spoke threats, a treasure in a closed chest on a tall crest above a forest.

No rest.

A small test against the zest of this poet’s. I’ll pass the test then pass the test to the next. At a desk impress, confess or jest your best. Dress the mess in less and less duress. Address the text, your stress prevents success. Press, don’t guess—think steps ahead like chess.

Yes.

I used to ride through cities on Shadowfax, now I ride through on shadows’ backs. With a daunting scepter, haunting specters with shallow laughs that strike like a jagged axe. A gaze that stuns, and burns like a graze from the sun. Yeah, a scowl from beneath a cowl, as I growl, howl and prowl on a brazen run. On a mission to save the sons, and save the daughters—the sacred ones. I am the likes of Vader’s son. Sent by the Ancient One (not Doctor Strange’s one), I came tamed, unchained, trained with a light saber and a laser gun. Steel teeth, quasar gums and a razor tongue. Peering where the Savior hung. Praising with a raging lung. Fist raised with a flaming thumb. Dangling from an aging rung. There is nothing another man can save me from.

You got something to add? …

Save me sum.

— The End —