Are all footy fanatics
Total raving lunatics?
The flag's in the bag!
We've got lively lads
The best we've ever had!
Peter Pans on ***,
The flags that time forgot!
Footy finals fever,
Talk about dream weavers!
Footy finals phobia,
TV claustrophobia,
Why didn't we win,
Any old excuse again!
Footy fanatics,
Raving lunatics,
Footy finals fever,
Melbourne's dream weavers!

The evil witch is after the 11 year olds


Once upon a time there was an evil witch,, and this witch was like no witch i n any fairy tales, no this witch was pure evil, you see she took pride in grabbing 11 year old kids avid locking themselves in the basement to eventually chop them up and put them in an oven, to give herself a feast, the first kid was young a 11 year old boy named Tommy Kinarfis and he was on his way to school and he was just minding his own business when this black car pulled up and before Tommy could run away, the witch grabbed him and shoved him in the boot of his car and being as scared as he was, Tommy really didn't want to die, and tried to bang the the walls of the boot to show that he has been kidnapped but nobody heard him and before he knew it, he found himself locked up in a cage being fattened up, so the witch can eat him up, and after about 12 hours Tommy was dead, and the witch was happy, the next kid was 11 year old daughter of president Frederick Leonardo, you see this president was so conservative and everyone was too scared to do anything bad to his kid, but one day when the presidents daughter, who was named Terri was waiting for her body guard after school when this car turned up and this man got out pretending to be her bodyguard one day, and after 2 hours of driving Terri realised that she has been kidnapped, and then the bodyguard took off his nice disguise and when Terri noticed it was the witch, she tried to escape but soon enough she was locked in her cage being fattened up, so the witch can enjoy her feast, and the presidents daughter Terri was dead and the president had a little burial for her.
The next kid was 11 year old Peter Vernin and he was a kid who loves sport, especially the AFL, because that was a boys sport, and Peter had it in his mind that because he played AFL, he will he invincible but as he was going to footy training, he had to walk because his parents had to work, a ******* car pulled up and this man pulled up and asked Peter if he would like a ride, and Peter, being only 11 said yes thinking he was being treated like a kid that everyone liked, but then he found himself chained up in the witch's basement ready to be slaughtered at any given time, you see because Tommy had muscles, that was enough to make him be nice and tender to eat and when the witch finds out that he had suffered enough, then the witch will cook Tommy up and before he knew it, Tommy was just a corpse and the witch was feeling very happy and this made her feel she can slowly get rid of each child as soon as they reached 11, and she was feeling like nobody will ever stop her from accomplishing this feat.
The FBI are having a hard time trying to find there missing kids because they just vanished without a trace, but they had every officer and forensic investigator in to try to catch the witch and make her pay, mind you the FBI were unaware that the persons responsible is a wicked evil witch.
The next kid was Raymond Terrestal, an 11 year old who was in a broken home and every day he went to the local shops to buy milk for the family but also he would occasionally steal a chocolate bar and also a few flavoured milks, and the witch said to herself that this boy needs to chopped him up and watch his shiny white legs slowly turn to very tasty meat. Even though Raymond put up a fight, saying you can't chop me up, fella, I am a sports boy and I have heaps of muscles, but the witch told him that the muscles make him even more tastier, and she wants to have Raymond to really taste nice so he can really get away from any way of being a sports boy, and as Raymond was cooking, he is yelling and yelling, saying, let me go, I am a big tough sports boy, I like playing footy, I don't wanna die, let me go and leave me alone old witch, but the witch said heh heh heh hen heh, no buddy you ain't a cool kid, all the other kids are tough, but you Raymond, no you are all mine, and Raymond was screaming, please save me from the wicked witch, And he also said why me, why me, why me, and the witch said, no mate your not like us,mate
You are still a little shy boy, and I am just doing what The Lord wants, you see Raymond, The Lord wants me to cook boys up when they turn 11, because then they are even more tender because they are mature enough so I get a good tasty bit of human flesh, and eventually Raymond died and the witch continued on her journey to rid the world of kids right till they turn 11 years of age.
The next kid was 11 years old Naomi Roberts who was a really family and friends type of girl and she very rarely strayed away., but one day she and her friends played outside the witch's house, because it was a pretty good place for kids to play in but unknown to Naomi that her friends were playing a trick on her and had planned to get her stuck in the bushes near the mail box and when the witch went outside to see what the noise was, she saw Naomi stuck in the garden trying to break free, and the witch used her powers to make her look like a nice old lady and brought Naomu inside to keep her safe, then the witch showed her true colours and told Naomi that she will never escape from her, and she also said she is hosting a dinner party and Naomi is the main course and from the moment she said that Naomi started to get scared and screamed and screamed for the witch to let her go, she also said it's not she that the witch wants, it's her friends, who stabbed Naomi in the back and the witch said, no they are young women and I don't want to **** young women, it's you, who I want, little girlie, and you are never going to ever escape from me, and Naomi said no Mrs Witch, you will be with me till my dinner party and then Naomi you will be no more. You will leave this world never to return little baby little girlie, Naomi is very scared and starts to feel like her perfect world is about to end because the wicked witch has her right where she wants her.
Naomi was trying to scream so loud that the witch's neighbour would hear and come and rescue her but nobody can hear her and Naomi starts to get very scared, so scared in fact, she tried to fight her way out of the cage but it is closed so tightly and Naomi is starting to get scared because still the FBI have no leads on the whereabouts of these kids, and despite being bullied by the parents of the missing kids, they feel tempted to give up the search till they get a lead, simply because there is no point in trying to find a needle in a haystack, but the parents wanted them to find their missing kids, even if it means they have to become vigilantes and defy the law and find those kids themselves, meanwhile the next day in the witch's house, the witch was starting to cook Naomi up so they can have their dinner party, a nice tasty little girl for dinner, heh heh heh heh heh heh heh, and when Naomi was slowly dying the witch kept of stirring and stirring to make Naomi really suffer, you see for the witch, well, she took pride in torturing kids as soon as they turn 11, and then Naomi died and the witch was happy and said that is another 11 year old under our belt, heh heh heh heh heh
The next kid was 11 year old Pat Roberts, who was a cool boy who loved to tease so much that he would take people away from their families to do so, unless they do as they do and one day he gave up playing football with the tough boys to tease a boy who he hates very much, and stop him from being a family person and also brainwashing everyone into thinking a family person is supposed to do as they are told, and one day the wicked witch who really wanted to keep taking these boys decided to go after Pat Roberts and cook him up and then she will get rid if this boy from the would once and for all, but getting rid of Pat Roberts will be a hard thing because this boy is so hard to catch, because he is ever so smart, and it will be a battle to get rid of this Pat Roberts because of that, Pat Roberts would say, no mr witch, you can't catch me fella, you can never catch me for as long as you'll alive, and you are going to die soon if you keep catching kids anyway, the next day on the witch's quest to catch Pat Roberts, she decided to use her ***** magic to try and lure him to his house but Pat Roberts is too smart for that as he kept himself inside saying no witch is going to get me, if you are going to catch me, you'll have to get past my father and I can guarantee old witch that my dad has the power to put you right in her place, you are mrs witch, you haven't got the power to overcome me, so come on wicked witch, just you try and catch me, but you won't get me, I can make you suffer of you try and get me ya wicked witch and the wicked witch straight away thought maybe one day I will catch Pat Roberts, I will try and take some other 11 year olds and the next 11 year old was Gordon Gullet and he was a boy who was a bit of a black sheep who went on a mission to **** the wicked witch but when the wicked witch captured him, but she had no plan to cook him  up, actually she planned to try to get him on side to catch Pat Roberts and when Gordon said, I won't tell you where Gordon is, I will never tell you where he is. Just let me go ya old cranky wicked witch, and because Gordon was talking too much the witch put her hand on her mouth, she eventually had to put sticky tape on it and then the wicked witch said, if you don't tell me where Pat Roberts is, you'll suffer, and I mean you'll suffer, mate, suffer forever mate.
The next day when the witch got up and saw Gordon trying up escape and the witch said, mate, you'll never escape from me, no you'll never escape, until you tell me where is your friend Pat Roberts, and Gordon said no, I won't ever tell ya, you will have to **** me first, Pat Roberts is a friend, no, I will never ever tell you, ya wicked witch, and the witch said no I ain't going to **** you, I just want you to tell you where Pat Roberts is, why won't you tell me, I will be your friend forever, and Gordon said, no, I won't tell you anything you old fucken witch, and you can do to me anything you want, I will never ever tell you, you mean nasty old witch.
The witch then said, ok, you will stay there in that cage till you tell me and when you are ready to tell me where your friend Pat Roberts is, I will make you suffer, even if I don't **** you, you will be suffering without anything to make you keep your mojo in tact, you will suffer Gordon, I will make sure of that, so unless you tell me where your mate is, you will suffer, and be kept there until you tell us of the whereabouts of Pat Roberts because I want you and him to cooked together and eaten, and if you don't tell me, I will keep you here for the rest of your life, so Gordon are you going to tell me and Gordon yells out with a loud voice, which went,  NEVER, my mate Pat Roberts wants to tease people who are trying to work to hard and push themselves into breaking point, and I want you to let me go, because I am tougher that you, cause you are a mean nasty witch, who should burn on the planet Mercury and the witch said no, mate, say hell, you see you are still a little Christian boy, and while you have your beliefs that you will die one day, you are like us, but if I find out that you are keeping the whereabouts of Pat Roberts from me, I will hold you at knife point and force you to tell you and Gordon said no, I will never tell you, never, I will prefer to do die myself, rather than tell you where he is mate.
The next day the witch went out to try and catch Pat Roberts and then Pat's dad said to Pat Roberts that he will protect him and when they heard a strange noise outside their house and it was the wicked witch, who was lurking about outside and when Pat Roberts went outside, the witch put a hand over his mouth and said I have you mate and then the FBI came and despite a desperate fight to get herself free, the FBI took off to Salem to get burnt at the stake and Pat Roberts and Gordon was safely going home with his family and the witch was reincarnated as a pig and then a tiger and after that a deer, she suffered, especially when she will be constantly bullied by hunters.

Women’s afl

Round 1

Geelong. 3. 6. 24
Collingwood. 3. 5. 23


Bulldogs. 2. 6. 18
Adelaide. 1. 11. 17


Kangaroos. 7. 10. 52
Carlton 2. 4. 16



Fremantle 9. 5. 59
Melbourne 8. 7. 55


Brisbane. 4. 5. 29
GWS. 4. 3. 27

Some very close games
Shows that women’s afl can be very exciting not as high scoring as the men but the women played very well
Well done to Geelong bulldogs kangaroos Fremantle and Brisbane
The champions are upon us today
Each game was exciting to play
Each team played well but only one winner is allowed
Unless it is a draw

The people of Canberra, yes they love it, oh yeah

you see I come here after getting ribbed by *******
And teased by so called friends
When all I wanted was to be treated like a Normy
And, yes I did normal things, like watch footy and exercise
And I also ran around town trying to enjoy being a kid
Yes, I was made to be such an *******, I hated it
Me and my brother played cricket in the park
And these two dudes tried to scare us off
I am too fit for them, but I found one city
Was nothing like that, yes the Canberra crowd were nice to me
The first word a kid I hardly knew said to me, was your like us, man
Because he thought I was cool, to his point of view
And I made more school friends, and I found this so fun
Then, I made a friend who ended up going to the Raiders matches
When they started in 1982, and we had a lot of fun going to those matches
Cheering them on till their first grand final in 1987
And we continued it in 1989 and '91 and '92 and then their last premiership back in 1994, and that was the year that I went down to Mawson, where the Raiders leagues club was, and saw the team come home, and I asked my friend we support the Raiders, how about we support the Cannons, you see we play basketball, how about we watch it, the cannons are playing well, so we supported the Canberra Cannons, who were our local basketball team, yes, we saw players like Herb McEachin and Phil Smyth, and Jamie Kennedy and Andy Campbell, and my friend saw him at a course he did, and Willie Simmons, played for them, as well as the Alabama Slammer, who did a add for Captain snooze, it went, ' the Alabama slammer, through on his pygamas, lying on his bunk dreaming of the slam dunk, yes, Canberra was on the map, but like the Raiders they stopped playing really well, like finals well, and unlike the cannons are no more, but then after the Canberra Kookaburras were popular in Rugby Union in the 80s, I think the tune went like this, kookaburras play in the ACT, merry, merry, kings of the Union field was he, play kookaburras play, and we'll win the Sydney comp, well I think that is how it went, but who cares, because later on we got a stronger team , the ACT Brumbies, they were so cool, they won two cups, but this rugby comp was harder to win, and at the same time, the best Canberra team, who won the most cups, were the Canberra Capitals, who are the women's basketball team, yes, 10 out of 12 premierships, yes they are so cool, well the capitals run I think is over, and the Raiders have been doing well in the under 20s, but last year they did well and were thrashed in the grand final, Canberra looked doomed, untill something happened to Canberra in February 2013, and that was a moment that changed Canberra forever, you see I have been following tbe Major league from the USA, and I drove my friend nuts, you see the whole city of Canberra got behind the Raiders, and the cannons and the capitals and the Brumbies, the kookaburras, and we support our local Aussie rules comp, we have the best local comp in Australia, it went national, yes, that is cool, we made mistakes with the implosion of our old hospital, which killed Katie ******, and we at least haven't got a right wing government, back in the 80s, we had no government, but back to where we're at, in February 2013, Canberra changed, yes this was the time of the Canberra winning the Australian baseball Claxton shield baseball comp, from the wooden spoon, yes Canberra us great, and we are putting some great apartments up, to bring people here to live up to it's aboriginal name, meeting place, you see I met some really nice people at sporting events in Canberra, and I don't want that to change, you see Newcastle dudes don't have a good sports following like the Canberra crowd has, yes maybe they have the Jets, in soccer, and the Newcastle knights, but we have the GWS, yes they play 3 normal season matches in our city, so we are the boys in our wonderful city of Canberra, we support the AFL, and the AFL is the greatest game of all. Newcastle local sports is just Newcastle, ours include a miniature national comp, we have the Kanga cup soccer tournament, which is better than the Newcastle jets, yes we are the mighty Canberra crowd, we are making our city so proud, we have better stuff, like sports to suit all walks of life, as well as having the best flower show in the world, called Floriade, how many flower shows have people performing songs at them the way we do, and February has the Multi cultural festival, so let's celebrate the 100 years of Canberra, we ain't shy, the rest of Australia, just thinks their the best.
The end


Sent from my iPhone

The evil witch is after the 11 year olds


Once upon a time there was an evil witch,, and this witch was like no witch i n any fairy tales, no this witch was pure evil, you see she took pride in grabbing 11 year old kids avid locking themselves in the basement to eventually chop them up and put them in an oven, to give herself a feast, the first kid was young a 11 year old boy named Tommy Kinarfis and he was on his way to school and he was just minding his own business when this black car pulled up and before Tommy could run away, the witch grabbed him and shoved him in the boot of his car and being as scared as he was, Tommy really didn't want to die, and tried to bang the the walls of the boot to show that he has been kidnapped but nobody heard him and before he knew it, he found himself locked up in a cage being fattened up, so the witch can eat him up, and after about 12 hours Tommy was dead, and the witch was happy, the next kid was 11 year old daughter of president Frederick Leonardo, you see this president was so conservative and everyone was too scared to do anything bad to his kid, but one day when the presidents daughter, who was named Terri was waiting for her body guard after school when this car turned up and this man got out pretending to be her bodyguard one day, and after 2 hours of driving Terri realised that she has been kidnapped, and then the bodyguard took off his nice disguise and when Terri noticed it was the witch, she tried to escape but soon enough she was locked in her cage being fattened up, so the witch can enjoy her feast, and the presidents daughter Terri was dead and the president had a little burial for her.
The next kid was 11 year old Peter Vernin and he was a kid who loves sport, especially the AFL, because that was a boys sport, and Peter had it in his mind that because he played AFL, he will he invincible but as he was going to footy training, he had to walk because his parents had to work, a ******* car pulled up and this man pulled up and asked Peter if he would like a ride, and Peter, being only 11 said yes thinking he was being treated like a kid that everyone liked, but then he found himself chained up in the witch's basement ready to be slaughtered at any given time, you see because Tommy had muscles, that was enough to make him be nice and tender to eat and when the witch finds out that he had suffered enough, then the witch will cook Tommy up and before he knew it, Tommy was just a corpse and the witch was feeling very happy and this made her feel she can slowly get rid of each child as soon as they reached 11, and she was feeling like nobody will ever stop her from accomplishing this feat.
The FBI are having a hard time trying to find there missing kids because they just vanished without a trace, but they had every officer and forensic investigator in to try to catch the witch and make her pay, mind you the FBI were unaware that the persons responsible is a wicked evil witch.
The next kid was Raymond Terrestal, an 11 year old who was in a broken home and every day he went to the local shops to buy milk for the family but also he would occasionally steal a chocolate bar and also a few flavoured milks, and the witch said to herself that this boy needs to chopped him up and watch his shiny white legs slowly turn to very tasty meat. Even though Raymond put up a fight, saying you can't chop me up, fella, I am a sports boy and I have heaps of muscles, but the witch told him that the muscles make him even more tastier, and she wants to have Raymond to really taste nice so he can really get away from any way of being a sports boy, and as Raymond was cooking, he is yelling and yelling, saying, let me go, I am a big tough sports boy, I like playing footy, I don't wanna die, let me go and leave me alone old witch, but the witch said heh heh heh hen heh, no buddy you ain't a cool kid, all the other kids are tough, but you Raymond, no you are all mine, and Raymond was screaming, please save me from the wicked witch, And he also said why me, why me, why me, and the witch said, no mate your not like us,mate
You are still a little shy boy, and I am just doing what The Lord wants, you see Raymond, The Lord wants me to cook boys up when they turn 11, because then they are even more tender because they are mature enough so I get a good tasty bit of human flesh, and eventually Raymond died and the witch continued on her journey to rid the world of kids right till they turn 11 years of age.
The next kid was 11 years old Naomi Roberts who was a really family and friends type of girl and she very rarely strayed away., but one day she and her friends played outside the witch's house, because it was a pretty good place for kids to play in but unknown to Naomi that her friends were playing a trick on her and had planned to get her stuck in the bushes near the mail box and when the witch went outside to see what the noise was, she saw Naomi stuck in the garden trying to break free, and the witch used her powers to make her look like a nice old lady and brought Naomu inside to keep her safe, then the witch showed her true colours and told Naomi that she will never escape from her, and she also said she is hosting a dinner party and Naomi is the main course and from the moment she said that Naomi started to get scared and screamed and screamed for the witch to let her go, she also said it's not she that the witch wants, it's her friends, who stabbed Naomi in the back and the witch said, no they are young women and I don't want to **** young women, it's you, who I want, little girlie, and you are never going to ever escape from me, and Naomi said no Mrs Witch, you will be with me till my dinner party and then Naomi you will be no more. You will leave this world never to return little baby little girlie, Naomi is very scared and starts to feel like her perfect world is about to end because the wicked witch has her right where she wants her.
Naomi was trying to scream so loud that the witch's neighbour would hear and come and rescue her but nobody can hear her and Naomi starts to get very scared, so scared in fact, she tried to fight her way out of the cage but it is closed so tightly and Naomi is starting to get scared because still the FBI have no leads on the whereabouts of these kids, and despite being bullied by the parents of the missing kids, they feel tempted to give up the search till they get a lead, simply because there is no point in trying to find a needle in a haystack, but the parents wanted them to find their missing kids, even if it means they have to become vigilantes and defy the law and find those kids themselves, meanwhile the next day in the witch's house, the witch was starting to cook Naomi up so they can have their dinner party, a nice tasty little girl for dinner, heh heh heh heh heh heh heh, and when Naomi was slowly dying the witch kept of stirring and stirring to make Naomi really suffer, you see for the witch, well, she took pride in torturing kids as soon as they turn 11, and then Naomi died and the witch was happy and said that is another 11 year old under our belt, heh heh heh heh heh
The next kid was 11 year old Pat Roberts, who was a cool boy who loved to tease so much that he would take people away from their families to do so, unless they do as they do and one day he gave up playing football with the tough boys to tease a boy who he hates very much, and stop him from being a family person and also brainwashing everyone into thinking a family person is supposed to do as they are told, and one day the wicked witch who really wanted to keep taking these boys decided to go after Pat Roberts and cook him up and then she will get rid if this boy from the would once and for all, but getting rid of Pat Roberts will be a hard thing because this boy is so hard to catch, because he is ever so smart, and it will be a battle to get rid of this Pat Roberts because of that, Pat Roberts would say, no mr witch, you can't catch me fella, you can never catch me for as long as you'll alive, and you are going to die soon if you keep catching kids anyway, the next day on the witch's quest to catch Pat Roberts, she decided to use her ***** magic to try and lure him to his house but Pat Roberts is too smart for that as he kept himself inside saying no witch is going to get me, if you are going to catch me, you'll have to get past my father and I can guarantee old witch that my dad has the power to put you right in her place, you are mrs witch, you haven't got the power to overcome me, so come on wicked witch, just you try and catch me, but you won't get me, I can make you suffer of you try and get me ya wicked witch and the wicked witch straight away thought maybe one day I will catch Pat Roberts, I will try and take some other 11 year olds and the next 11 year old was Gordon Gullet and he was a boy who was a bit of a black sheep who went on a mission to **** the wicked witch but when the wicked witch captured him, but she had no plan to cook him  up, actually she planned to try to get him on side to catch Pat Roberts and when Gordon said, I won't tell you where Gordon is, I will never tell you where he is. Just let me go ya old cranky wicked witch, and because Gordon was talking too much the witch put her hand on her mouth, she eventually had to put sticky tape on it and then the wicked witch said, if you don't tell me where Pat Roberts is, you'll suffer, and I mean you'll suffer, mate, suffer forever mate.
The next day when the witch got up and saw Gordon trying up escape and the witch said, mate, you'll never escape from me, no you'll never escape, until you tell me where is your friend Pat Roberts, and Gordon said no, I won't ever tell ya, you will have to **** me first, Pat Roberts is a friend, no, I will never ever tell you, ya wicked witch, and the witch said no I ain't going to **** you, I just want you to tell you where Pat Roberts is, why won't you tell me, I will be your friend forever, and Gordon said, no, I won't tell you anything you old fucken witch, and you can do to me anything you want, I will never ever tell you, you mean nasty old witch.
The witch then said, ok, you will stay there in that cage till you tell me and when you are ready to tell me where your friend Pat Roberts is, I will make you suffer, even if I don't **** you, you will be suffering without anything to make you keep your mojo in tact, you will suffer Gordon, I will make sure of that, so unless you tell me where your mate is, you will suffer, and be kept there until you tell us of the whereabouts of Pat Roberts because I want you and him to cooked together and eaten, and if you don't tell me, I will keep you here for the rest of your life, so Gordon are you going to tell me and Gordon yells out with a loud voice, which went,  NEVER, my mate Pat Roberts wants to tease people who are trying to work to hard and push themselves into breaking point, and I want you to let me go, because I am tougher that you, cause you are a mean nasty witch, who should burn on the planet Mercury and the witch said no, mate, say hell, you see you are still a little Christian boy, and while you have your beliefs that you will die one day, you are like us, but if I find out that you are keeping the whereabouts of Pat Roberts from me, I will hold you at knife point and force you to tell you and Gordon said no, I will never tell you, never, I will prefer to do die myself, rather than tell you where he is mate.
The next day the witch went out to try and catch Pat Roberts and then Pat's dad said to Pat Roberts that he will protect him and when they heard a strange noise outside their house and it was the wicked witch, who was lurking about outside and when Pat Roberts went outside, the witch put a hand over his mouth and said I have you mate and then the FBI came and despite a desperate fight to get herself free, the FBI took off to Salem to get burnt at the stake and Pat Roberts and Gordon was safely going home with his family and the witch was reincarnated as a pig and then a tiger and after that a deer, she suffered, especially when she will be constantly bullied by hunters.

The people of Canberra, yes they love it, oh yeah

you see I come here after getting ribbed by *******
And teased by so called friends
When all I wanted was to be treated like a Normy
And, yes I did normal things, like watch footy and exercise
And I also ran around town trying to enjoy being a kid
Yes, I was made to be such an *******, I hated it
Me and my brother played cricket in the park
And these two dudes tried to scare us off
I am too fit for them, but I found one city
Was nothing like that, yes the Canberra crowd were nice to me
The first word a kid I hardly knew said to me, was your like us, man
Because he thought I was cool, to his point of view
And I made more school friends, and I found this so fun
Then, I made a friend who ended up going to the Raiders matches
When they started in 1982, and we had a lot of fun going to those matches
Cheering them on till their first grand final in 1987
And we continued it in 1989 and '91 and '92 and then their last premiership back in 1994, and that was the year that I went down to Mawson, where the Raiders leagues club was, and saw the team come home, and I asked my friend we support the Raiders, how about we support the Cannons, you see we play basketball, how about we watch it, the cannons are playing well, so we supported the Canberra Cannons, who were our local basketball team, yes, we saw players like Herb McEachin and Phil Smyth, and Jamie Kennedy and Andy Campbell, and my friend saw him at a course he did, and Willie Simmons, played for them, as well as the Alabama Slammer, who did a add for Captain snooze, it went, ' the Alabama slammer, through on his pygamas, lying on his bunk dreaming of the slam dunk, yes, Canberra was on the map, but like the Raiders they stopped playing really well, like finals well, and unlike the cannons are no more, but then after the Canberra Kookaburras were popular in Rugby Union in the 80s, I think the tune went like this, kookaburras play in the ACT, merry, merry, kings of the Union field was he, play kookaburras play, and we'll win the Sydney comp, well I think that is how it went, but who cares, because later on we got a stronger team , the ACT Brumbies, they were so cool, they won two cups, but this rugby comp was harder to win, and at the same time, the best Canberra team, who won the most cups, were the Canberra Capitals, who are the women's basketball team, yes, 10 out of 12 premierships, yes they are so cool, well the capitals run I think is over, and the Raiders have been doing well in the under 20s, but last year they did well and were thrashed in the grand final, Canberra looked doomed, untill something happened to Canberra in February 2013, and that was a moment that changed Canberra forever, you see I have been following tbe Major league from the USA, and I drove my friend nuts, you see the whole city of Canberra got behind the Raiders, and the cannons and the capitals and the Brumbies, the kookaburras, and we support our local Aussie rules comp, we have the best local comp in Australia, it went national, yes, that is cool, we made mistakes with the implosion of our old hospital, which killed Katie ******, and we at least haven't got a right wing government, back in the 80s, we had no government, but back to where we're at, in February 2013, Canberra changed, yes this was the time of the Canberra winning the Australian baseball Claxton shield baseball comp, from the wooden spoon, yes Canberra us great, and we are putting some great apartments up, to bring people here to live up to it's aboriginal name, meeting place, you see I met some really nice people at sporting events in Canberra, and I don't want that to change, you see Newcastle dudes don't have a good sports following like the Canberra crowd has, yes maybe they have the Jets, in soccer, and the Newcastle knights, but we have the GWS, yes they play 3 normal season matches in our city, so we are the boys in our wonderful city of Canberra, we support the AFL, and the AFL is the greatest game of all. Newcastle local sports is just Newcastle, ours include a miniature national comp, we have the Kanga cup soccer tournament, which is better than the Newcastle jets, yes we are the mighty Canberra crowd, we are making our city so proud, we have better stuff, like sports to suit all walks of life, as well as having the best flower show in the world, called Floriade, how many flower shows have people performing songs at them the way we do, and February has the Multi cultural festival, so let's celebrate the 100 years of Canberra, we ain't shy, the rest of Australia, just thinks their the best.
The end

Vb
a mans drink
only consumed by AFL players
i dont play but i still drink it
dont even give a ****
yolo
mr patch is a ***** *****
keen for that vb when i get home, in the fridge
need a new carton
******* hell maclean high has the cross country today
dont even wanna go
wanna drink my vb
keen for some steak and pork
with a side of vb
aussie mate, get some stickes on my commy
vb stickers
oi ****, come round later for a bbq
and a vb
tru auzie

ydney sydney sydney oi oi oi

they beat the roos mate, real true blue

go sydney go sydney go sydney go

they are the best team in the AFL

franklin and goodsey, yeah mate yeah

off to the pub to have a ****** beer

those mighty sydney swans pack a true blue

ya see the swannies are for me and you

go sydney go sydney go sydney go

we’ll get ‘em yeah the mighty swans yeah

the best in the land go swans

THE TORTURING VOICES




you see my dad was watching the cricket with us

and i watched it with him, and it was very fun, you see

we saw australia being beaten by the west indies, because

they were so cool, you see, we were the cricket boys

and no robber wanted to rob us, because we were into australia’s favourite sport, cricket

you see i heard a non realistic image of my father saying

brian’s not a mans kid, brian’s not a man’s kid

and i was trying to relax and calmly watch the match

and my family were unrealistically teasing me, mind you they were having fun

and the words they said were different to me as it was for them

brian’s not a mans kid, don’t get kidnapped brian be like us

brian’s not a man’s kid, and watched the cricket, ya know trevor chappell doing an underarm ball

mum called cricket, anything and everything which has everything you hate

well, i don’t believe that, i was feeling like trying to be a mans kid

brian’s not a mans kid, brian’s not a mans kid

and i was getting these awful visions, i wanted these voices to stop

you see people in canberra were doing it too, but they looked like fierce kidnappers

and i said you can’t get me, i am a sports watcher

so i went home and obsessingly watching the cricket and AFL and rugby league, rugby union

you name the sport i watched it, and i fell asleep in front of the sport

you see i have this vision that mens kids watch the sport, mens kids watch the sport

brian’s not a mans kid, ******* ya hooligan away from us

you see, i wanted at that stage a hooligan to my dad and i had someone grab me outside a club

and i kicked him saying, get off me ya kidnapper, you won’t get ya hands on me mate

and dad was watching the cricket and enjoyed it, but i got frustrated with all that teasing

i didn’t want to be kidnap victim and i hate being my families or friends little teasie

i battle voices saying how is our little tease doing hey

but i hated when people wanted to bully me, saying your family are like us, your not

i said i like sport and they said, no you don’t, your family does, and your not like your family mate, your like us now man

i told my voices to *******, and they said, your not like your family, your like us

and this made me into a little 2 year old boy, i hated that voice

i remember i loved watching agro, which was a funny puppet on channel 7, and the mens kids said

don’t watch agro, watch cheezeTV, which was the cartoon show on the other channel

and my voices going crazy saying, you are a crazy person, who is too old for baby agro

and you are not like your family, your still like us, buddy

i screamed out, LEAVE ME ALONE, i am a sports watching mans kid

and dads image said brian’s not a mans kid, brian’s not a mans kid

but it could’ve been greame thrones kidnapper or patrick dunbars kidnapper

i said voices,  ‘stop', i wanted to be like my family, they said you are not like your family, your still like us

and i said, they look cool, and you guys look stupid, please leave me alone

there is also a man who wanted me and my brother tied to a pole, but we felt we weren’t immortal, but cool

i went into pubs to dance and watch the sport and i felt like a cool man

brian’s not a mans kid brian’s not a mans kid, stay in there koomarri man, get ****** mate went the little homebody kid

as i was watching the canberra bushrangers baseball team played, yeah totally awesome dude

brian’s not a mans kid, I WISH IT’LL ALL STOP

Giants of StarTrack



Johnny'.  Hi dudes and welcome to StarTrack oval which is going to be a great match
Between the gws Giants and Geelong cats, the Giants are undefeated here with wins over
Gold Coast and Melbourne and this is promising to be a great encounter, and now here
Is Brendan with his little jingle

Go the Giants go the Giants we are the team that brings afl back to the nations capital
We will never never ever fail
You see we will make sure the Geelong cats score fewer like a little baby snail
Go the Giants of StarTrack yeah
Cool your hearts with a nice cold beer
And make sure the mighty Giants

Johnny'.  Yeah Brendan they was a great jingle and now here is Peter

Giants to win Giants to win, yeah they will win this game
Come on Giants you must play well
Yeah the Giants for victory
Giants to win here at star track yeah, go the mighty Giants

Johnny'.    Thanks Peter and here is another jingle from sue longways

Giants are better than any team, yeah we will have a nice cold beer
And maybe this could mean finals for us
But we must win today to find out where
I am sue longways here to cheer for the Giants
We will never ever get into anymore fights
We want a nice clean game
Yeah we will get the price of game
Me, sue longways supports the Giants baby
And we are in the jungle baby supporting the Giants to beat the cats
I am sue longways, I support the team right till the end
Go the gws Giants

Johnny'.  Ok that is enough for now i will be back at quarter time see ya


Quarter time

Johnny'.  Hi dudes welcome to quarter time fun and our Giants are 1-1-7 and the cats
Are 3-6-24 and what a match unfortunately not in our favour, here is tim with his jingle

We are Geelong the greatest team of all
Oh yeah Geelong we are certainly on the ball
We have got a hold on the Giants early
Yeah the mighty cats for victory oh yes e ree

Johnny'.   Now here is olly

Go the Giants go the Giants we must win this game
You see we must keep our performance up
Put the cats to sleep
Yeah go the Giants go the Giants
We are the team of 2015, well hopefully we will win today
And give our Canberra crowd members a win

Johnny'.  Ok I will be back at half time go the Giants


Johnny'.   Hi dudes and the cats has us on toast about 40  -  15, 25 points up
But I think the Giants have still hope, they should be further in front, well the Giants
Need to play well in the 2 nd half and now here is Robert

The cats are in front
At the half time break,
It's great to see them leading
And the cats are looking like winning
But the Giants could get closer
Go the mighty cats, I can't bare you to lose
johnny'.  Ok dudes and what a great match, as we draw the $1-000-000 prize now
So let's see what number it is, number 1235, and it is Harry burnseide and he has a winning
Jingle for us
Yeah I have won a million bucks oh yeah oh yeah
From this day I am a millionaire oh yeah oh yeah
You see today the cats are up against the Giants
And if you meet me at the bar I will shout you a beer
All the crowd yell out, saying give me a shout

Johnny'.  Ok congratulations to Harry and let's hope that gws can be undefeated on the Giants
Of StarTrack and yeah this is going to be radical and now here is a jingle from the Auskicker of the week

Go Giants go Giants we will win it we will win it
If we lose, please be up front so I can cheer you on cheer you on
The lights are on, the cats are in front
The drinks are on ice and so is God
Yeah come on the mighty Giants mate, kick some fucken ***

Johnny'.  Thanks to the Auskicker of the week and now here is John Barnes with his jingle

Go the Giants the mighty Giants
Will we win this game
We are down by 25, but there should still be hope
We must beat the cats
We are the greater Western Sydney Giants
The team who plays 3 in Canberra, go the mighty Giants

Johnny'.  We will be back at 3 quarter time, go Giants

Johnny'.    Welcome to 3 quarter time and the cats are still leading but the Giants are closing
IN on them and here is Harry with his jingle

go the Giants go the Giants
The might of the Giants are mightier
Come on the western Sydney Giants
Yeah we will rule the roost
We are the best at StarTrack yeah
Give us a nice cold beer for a nice cold day
Nothing hot about today, dude
johnny'.  Ok here is kenny with his jingle

We are the Giants the greatest team of all
Ready to put it to Geelong and force them to drop the ball
We will play this last quarter like it's our own
Like king Solomon on his thrown
The cats are going to get beaten because the Giants are looking pretty slick
The Giants for victory


Johnny thank you kenny and now back to the match
See you full time, go Giants

Johnny'.    Welcome back and the cats won 59-42 over the Giants and now we are on the ground for kick to kick and first we have a jingle by yetta

Go Geelong the greatest team of all
Go the cats we are always on the ball
We played the game so brilliantly yessiree
Today we played away
Go the mighty cats we are the prince of victory
Live from StarTrack oval

Johnny'. Ok here is deadly dean

The Giants should have won this game hoorah hoorah
We are the best in the league hoorah
My friend said what happened we lost this match
I say we would have won it if we got those goals
And deadly dean says he is the champion of the StarTrack oval crowd

Johnny'.  Thank you deadly dean and now Peter

The cats are the best by far
Hoorah hoorah
They are better than the Giants by far
Hoorah hoorah
The cats are the best by far
They were too good for the Giants oh yeah
Go the mighty cats, better by flaming far oh far
Coming in from the top

Johnny'.   Ok thanks Peter and now here is tommy Marcardle

Crack open the beer and cheer for the cats
And send those Giants to kingdom come
And if the Giants ask us for a bit of biff
We say we are too cool for fights
You see the cats were too strong today
And Giants sank into the ground
Yeah mate yeah, go the mighty cats, oh yeah
Send west Sydney to seventh heaven, dude

Johnny'.   Yeah, you sent those Giants to seventh heaven, real bad
Tommy'.   Yeah, top game and I will boost this ball right to the commentary box
Johnny'.   Ok, try it, but no you were no where near it and now here is Keith with his
Jingle


And now we draw the final curtain
Yeah the cats are the best by far
The Giants were never in it
Yeah the cats are fighting fit
We are oh we are oh we are fighting fit oh yessiree
You see the Giants were kicking horribly
I don't understand why they played well last week
But lost this week, then jimmy Bartel said,
That is because the cats were too good, oh yessiree

Johnny'.  Ok before we go, here is sue longways with her final jingle

And now we draw the final curtain
The Giants lost, oh yeah
I don't know what went wrong mate
But the cats were too good
You see, Giants fans will swing on the curtain
And drop to the bottom like they do
Go the mighty cats said our mate Keith
Hopefully the Giants will bounce back
And win the remaining matches ooh yeah

Johnny'.  Ok dudes, that is it for day, we will be back next year on the Giants of StarTrack
See you, dudes


Sent from my iPad

Hi dudes

I am on the murrays bus heading for Batemans bay and there is only 1 hour
And a half left and I am looking forward to being close to the ocean
You see it's going to be great eating fish
And chips at the boathouse
You see I am having memories of when I went here with my mate Daniel and this
Is my first trip since I stopped ringing him up and I am staying in Mariners on the waterfront and I hope the room is ready when I get there
I have to rehearse my play lines as well
I woke up at 5 am in the morning at my mother's house and I remember walking with Daniel and the bus dropped water on us because it was raining But today iss lovely sunny day and now we have arrived at Braidwood to pick up a box and we are off again
We are entering the windey roads
Of the Clyde mountain and as I look
Out there are roadworks and lovely black cows, cows are beautiful creatures and yes we will be passing
Poo bears corner and dudes there is
Blue sky for miles, and I hope my room
Had fox footy so I can watch the parade I have just arrived in Batemans bay
And I arrived too early for the room at Mariners, so I left my baggage there and
Headed for the take away for an egg and bacon roll with BBQ sauce and hopefully people will be out of the room
When I return to the hotel And the egg and bacon roll was very tasty and after I left chixandstix I headed toward k mart
To buy a coke and wait for the time to tick away so I could enter my room
There are millions of Kids running around and I saw one guy running on
The road, yeah this is going to be a great grand final weekend on the south coast and I hope I get into the room
By 12 so I can see if they have the fox footy channel for the parade
But they didn't But it is a wonderful room with a nice view of the Clyde river
And I wish there was a fox footy but oh well we can't have everything but it is a beautiful view though
The next minute I walked down to the Batemans bay soldiers club and paid them $10 to become a member and I am
Going to
Watch the parade in air conditioned comfort I know I leave monday  but I find it is worth it
I am watching hawthorn and west coast go down the streets either he sun shining nicely in this great spring day and I am sinking coke by coke enjoying the grand final I have just arrived in Batemans bay
And I arrived too early for the room at Mariners, so I left my baggage there and
Headed for the take away for an egg and bacon roll with BBQ sauce and hopefully people will be out of the room
When I return to the hotel And the egg and bacon roll was very tasty and after I left chixandstix I headed toward k mart
To buy a coke and wait for the time to tick away so I could enter my room
There are millions of Kids running around and I saw one guy running on
The road, yeah this is going to be a great grand final weekend on the south coast and I hope I get into the room
By 12 so I can see if they have the fox footy channel for the parade
But they didn't But it is a wonderful room with a nice view of the Clyde river
And I wish there was a fox footy but oh well we can't have everything but it is a beautiful view though
The next minute I walked down to the Batemans bay soldiers club and paid them $10 to become a member and I am
Going to
Watch the parade in air conditioned comfort I know I leave Monday but I find it is worth it
I am watching hawthorn and west coast go down the streets either he sun shining nicely in this great spring day and I am sinking coke by coke enjoying the grand final And after walking home from the club
after watching the parade, I got $50 out
And went back to the hotel and presto
The TV was in better working order but
I don't have fox footy, so I am glad I went to the club and currently I am just
Relaxing in front of the box doing my art
And I saw the end of the rugby league
Grand final show and I am doing my hAlloween tapestryAnd now I am watching alive and cooking waiting for the 3 o'clock news
Bulletin to start and tonight I am going to have fish and chips as well as buying a few supplies to veg out with tonight
In front of the box, the view of the river
Is radically awesome dude and I am looking forward to my fish and chips
Down the coast
I just had fish and chips at the voatshed and yes mr seagull decided to Payne a visit
And you shoul have Heard the racket when I gave up one or two or three
And the fish was so fresh and for drinks I had pub squash and another seagull jumps up to say hello to Me and I said hell mister seagull and after I finished with my dinner I went to woollies to buy some supplied to satisfy my hunger tonight
And as I was walking home  a man said I was shaky he like a jelly on a plate and I said yeah I am a cool writer and artist
And then I went into my room to watch Becker then the news and I am going to spend a relaxing night on the night before west coast hopefully beat hawthorn and will I get fat tonight
Of course I am not going to eat it all tonight
I will concentrate on my creativityYou see I lying on my bed moving
My hand as I do each stitch watching
Neighbours and everybody loves Raymond and then watched the gardeners on better homes and gardens
And whe I was watching that some really cool party people were laughing and having a good time all I'm readiness
For the afl grand final tomorrow
As the song goes
We are the Eagles the west coast Eagles
We're the team to show you how
We are the better birds than the team of hawthorn we are the mighty west coast team but if hawthorn win tomorrow
I will ****** scream and now there is another talk show
Have you been paying attention
Which is a radically awesome show
But I Have turns it over to superman
On channrlll goI got up at 7 am this morning after having a nightmare of James Pederson
Getting his revenge on me after I teased him a bit and then I got up to go to the toilet and took my medication and went back to bed for 2 more hours and after that I had a shower and then breakfast
And got the room ready for the housekeepers to clean and then went on a walk to beautiful batehaven and as I walked down the road, there was this lovely sesbreeze and it was a beautiful
Hot day and I passed the fish and chip shop and the shell museum and bird land animal park and I saw families swimming in the pool and when I reached batehaven I bought myself a coke and say there watching isthe water and there is this water skier having a wow of a time and there was this man taking his dog down to the water and there are heaps of families taking their kids to the water on this nice hot day  
It is wonderful sitting by the beach and onr man is resting his dog
It is a nice day for the beach
And I am enjoying myself relaxing in the shade of this really hot day at the beach
And soon I must go to get some lunch and watch west coast beat hawthirn
Go the EaglesI entered the soldiers club and went straight to the bistro to have a hamburger with egg and bacon and chips and it was superb and then I went to the TV to watch the pre game show
And Elle Goulding and Bryan Adams
Were the entertainers and mike Brady sang up there Cazaly and even if they weren't there felt like singing up there goes Sydney and I chose the TV with a view of the Clyde river and I am still tipping west coast go the Eagles
The Hawks broke away with a lead at quarter time and half time and west coast are in for a record if they can get back from 57-26 down and the Kangaroos runner won the sprint giving money to youth homelessness
And the beach is a cool backdrop for the mighty MCG and I am still going for the eagkes but it will be hard
Go the eagles for what it's worth
Well we are the happy team at hawthorn
Showing the Eagles which birds the best, we fight them off from start to finish
Go the Hawks for the 2015 premiership
And it is a good reason to party on
Saturday night which is party night
Yes the Hawks are superior in this grand final and I am sitting in the batemans bay soldiers club watching the match and I am waiting for the presentation and if the motel has a band tonight
I am going party through frustrations by watching the band
I will probably get a pizza for dinner on the wharf
But the Hawks were the big birds the kings of the big game
Go the Hawks for victorycan hear you laughing. Go
You see you are laughing oh so hard mc cracking jokes celebrating the Cowboys win it was a wonderful win
I am glad the Broncos lost
You see I like people who party
They are my type of people
You see people laugh at each other
And they say go cowboys go
Then around Christmas time
They dress up as Santa and let out
A loud ** ** **
You see they say it very loud
It is like they lost thrift ** ** **
Where can it go go go
Doing the hanky pdnky with your mates
In the gay bar in downtown Sydney
Then we will celebrate a win
Cowboys Cowboys rah rah rah
Got he mighty Cowboys from now till the end of hhf day
Everyone has stopped laughing
Time for bed
Go the Cowboys

Hi everybody I am Briano alliano
And today I have a few poems and jingles for you
Here they are

I love to party up here on Saturn
Enjoying life, mate pretty ****** cool
I drink methane smoothies
And I really really enjoy it yeah
And I have a few fly burgers to share
They are good enough to eat
Eat eat eat
They are such a tasty treat
Treat treat treat
Covid can be annoying
I wish it would go away
Just imagine no afl grand final
In Melbourne that will be a shame
But we must be fucken careful
Oh yeah mate oh yeah
John Howard is in hospital
How long will he be there for
Well some say it is payback
For all the problems he caused the poor
Hey hey baby oh yeah
We must party on oh yeah
Get down to the ground yeah
Everyone party oh yeah mate
We must party oh yeah
And never stop

Our next song is c’mon Aussie c’mon Aussie c’mon
The virus is causing problems for the afl
And keeping out of Victoria will be a shame
Politicians arguing with each other
Like they normally do yeah
Even Barnaby Joyce has to say his piece
Yes an Aussie killed his victims in Christchurch but there is a lot of hurt
Well, he is the biggest **** you ever see
Yes c’mon Aussie c’mon oh yeah
C’mon Aussie c’mon
We must stay in Australia but what happens if you don’t
You end up getting hemeroids up the ***
And then footballers breaking covid 19 laws they just want to go somewhere to drink their beer
That is Australia for ya
Yes go home and your mama
Yes that is so cool yeseree
C’mon Aussie c’mon
Party on Aussie party
Just c’mon Aussie
C’mon oh yeah let’s crack open a beer
And PARTY

The next song is rock and roll devil

I am the devil incarnate
And his advocate
I tell the devil what to do
I stick up for him every day
I know a lot of people don’t believe in him
And a lot of people think he is evil yeah
But when you say you are the devil
You must think
About what your saying
Think about what you are doing
You must party all night
Some people call that the devils work
But that is a load of crap
Like a tree exploding sap
And the devil is told he doesn’t exist
So he brought out his bible
But that was burnt about 1500 years ago
And that is a sign he doesn’t exist
And that makes me the devils advocate to the Christians eyes

Thank you everyone
PARTY ON DUDES

Brian the cool vinnies bloke


you see brian allan was looking for something to do, to get him from being street trash

and a very nice lady named rowena said why don’t you work for vinnies, and brian said why not

and the next day, he was given an interview with helen, who was the boss at vinnies, and

she thought it would be great to have someone to do the bins and vacuum the floor before the start

and after 4 weeks of being there, brian thought he would like to be santa claus, and had to make uo

a proper reason for doing it, so brian said, i like the idea of giving the kids, who hate shopping with parents

a treat and helen thought she will make gingerbread men, to tickle the childs taste buds a lot,but helen was

in a bind, because i haven’t got a beard and she suggested i spray paint my real beard, but my parents were against that

because it would go against everything that santa stood for, but brian got angry with his parents and told them

that if they spray painted his beard, there will be no smart alek of a kid to pull his beard off, and as brian said that

his father yelled out, THAT’S ENOUGH, thinking i cared nothing about the kids of this city but that offended brian a lot

and made him hit his father, and this got brian really hyped up on being the best santa claus in canberra, and then

when brian explained to helen that it was causing a stir with the family to spray paint the beard, helen decided to

get a fake beard for me to use, and on the first day i played santa, i offered some of the adults gingerbread men

and they said, save them for the kids, and one little girl, who had the same resemblance to my eldest niece, said

i was a fake santa, and the santa at the mall was more real than i was, and some of the vinnies ladies brought their

own grandchildren in to get their gift from santa and i did my first year of santa, despite some smart a lek of a kid

attemptng to pull my beard off, but i was too smart for him, and after christmas was over packed my santa suit away for the first time

and then i met david who did the shoes, and i found him very good to talk too, you see i said when he dies he will be the

shoe shine man in heaven, but he sounded like he hated the idea, and he liked to joke around with stephen and mable and

i vacuumed the floor and then went outside to empty the clothing bin, and i did this all the time, ya know every day, and i had ken and brian

to help me, but brian thought it would be cool to bang on the clothing bin, while i was still in it and i told helen and she said

you should speak up for yourself, because i seem to let people walk all over me, and really i can’t be bullied by this so called brian

character, and then i started something new, you see i thought, it would be nice to to cook lunches 3 days a week at the new mental health

building, called the rainbow and i learnt how to do creative writing as well as meeting the messiah and a man named barry, who was a

really cool poet, sort of reminded me of my father, mainly because of his poem sounding like banjo patterson and henry lawson, and barry

was a lover of fitzroy, and supported the brisbane lions afl club, and i went to the club i do the bbq for, to watch the game with him and

he left before the end of the match and, i continued to go about my merry way, cooking meals at the rainbow and going on trips with the rainbow

having sing-a=longs and one man, warwick, swam 45 km at once and helen got a fire engine and i sat in it, and a star canberra raiders star

came to vinnies and signed a ball for me and my second year of santa claus went well also, i wrote fly burgers also that year, which was

funny and when i read it out, everyone was laughing along with it and they clapped it, and i read out the fact i missed scott macdonald also

and i went to queensland that year also, and when i got in my santa suit, i was visioning i will tell the kids i am an australian santa and instead of

living on the north pole, i lived right here in canberra but my parents who were strict on keeping kids imaginations flowing, hated me disillusioning

the kids minds, you see here is a poem about the aussie santa

ya see g’day mate i am the real santa

i don’t live at the north pole

i live in canberra australia, ya know the hot place, around christmas day

ya see ya know christmas is great as i do my gigs at vinnies

and as a treat i give out gingerbread men and lollies

you see christmas is fun for all ages dudes, yeah it’s fun oh yeah that’s right mate

i hope you don’t do ya santa gig way to ****** late


you see i thought i was given this gig, to bring the cool into santa

and one year i was doing my gig with an orange soda

who loves orange soda, i love orange soda

is it true, oh yeah it’s true ooh ooh ooh oh yeah

and in the following year, i was feeling fine, and my psychiatrist reduced my medication and that pushed me straight to the psych ward, where i thought

i died, and the psych ward was the gate to heaven and that ended the cool vinnies kid reign but i came back and i was more interested talking with david

and doing santa claus and that year i was checking tapes, but that only lasted 5 months, because there were getting more tapes coming in, i couldn’t keep it up

and santa was the thing, and because i was a good worker, suddenly everyone wanted me, but that was because of my manly charm, and helen left and glenn

came in and he had this little jingle, brian brian brian everything is fine, brian brian brian he’s a friend of mine brian brian brian makes the carpet shine?

you see his name is brian brian brian, and glenn sang that song to me every time i did the vacuuming at the shop and then after a few more santa gigs, glenn left and

paul s came in after vinnies had no boss, but i was still santa claus there and paul s was the official photographer for my santa claus gig, and that made me feel cool

and now, i am not santa anymore, but i really enjoyed the attention.

Performing on Saturn

Hi dudes and dudettes
Welcome to Saturn club rings and today we are playing poems and songs that will make you feel really cool
The first song is the west coast eagles victory song
We are the eagles
The west coast eagles
We are the ones who won that game
You see we have the power
To win the big game
Go the eagles who are one win away
You see with the eagles
The west coast eagles
Yes we are powerful
End tonight we will be in the club
To sink down a few cleansing ales

Yes that was a cool song and now here is our second song which is called hey dude what are you on about
You see when I was a partying
In the cold of this city
I see people trying to get me in
To their little gang oh yeah
I told them I didn’t wanna be in their gang but they said you are joining us oh yeah
I tried to wriggle out of it
It isn’t what I am into, no
Because I am into partying in a different way
Then these thugs came up to me
And said these little words
Hey dude, what are you on about
Then I went to the football club
To watch the very important match yes that makes me feel so divine
And my dad said yes your majesty when I told him what to do is was as if I didn’t know what to do
You see back then when I was a hooligan a ***** rotten hooligan
I found it hard to think what the **** was going on
Then these dudes said to me
Hey dude what is going on
Partying in the club is cool
And they really break no flaming rule you see god isn’t up there anymore because the bible was absolute ******* when they tell you everything that is in it
Hey dude what is going on

Thank you and that was a great song and our next song is yes your majesty
You see when I was young I told my family to say what I wanted them to say
Like you say heavy metal is cool
You say Martin Luther king had a dream
You say who is going to win the footy
You say you say you say
Dad goes yes your majesty in a very posh way
Yes your majesty after I say you say
Yes it is cool in many ways
Dad goes yes your majesty
Every fucken day
After I say you say
I told him, no I am not the queen
And I am no king either
I just want you to say
That I am the best
Just say west coast are the best well, dad just said yes your majesty yes you flaming majesty after I say you say
Yes your majesty every single day

That was a good song and now it is time to party with me
We drink taquila and bourbon yeah
We drink beer and wine for you
We get high on mariguana as well as *******
Yes it is time to party oh yeah we say
You say party time is here
Yes your majesty
You say get down and boogie
Yes your majesty
You see you can see me in my party clothes
Yes and my nanna is having a doze
Drinking beer to past time
I say fun you say cool
Yes your majesty I say what I want
I am a tool and a ****
Who loved life every day
Party party party mate
Party with a how’s it going mate
Get down with a bit of methane
Yeah mate yeah time to play

What a song and now here is winning the final

It is mighty hard to win a final
Especially when both teams want to be there
And the crowd yell out forever
Yeah mate yeah
When I get up this morning.
I will watch the Canberra afl grand final
Who the ******* will win
Well it will be close and it will be fun
How many people will turn up
It will be hard for both teams
Cause winning this grand final
Is what each team wants to do
Gets out there to score a goal
Goal goal a pretty good goal
And west coast are one win away of a grand final after coming back on Collingwood
With the McGuire family cheering on the pies but when west coast won yippee I ay
It was a shame that the swans are no more this year but Sydney still has a representative
There let’s hope they win
Go the demons beat the hawks
Don’t move don’t you dare squawk it will be hard oh hard to win that match so just get your ticket yes mate, clear the pickets welcome to Australia Britain or France going to this party in just my underpants
And you feel pretty cool as your favourite team wins the all important final oh yeah

Goodbye, time to go must get up to watch the Canberra afl
Go ainslie

I love Australia it looks fine to me   mate


You see Australia is very cool
There are a lot of fun things to do here
You can go down to Sydney"s beaches
Like Bondi, Manly or even Coogee
You can see if you can run faster
Than the best at city 2 surf
It puts Sydney on the Australian map
And we also have our great sporting games
Like cricket, tennis, AFL and the two rugby codes
If you go to the USA, you'll see so many parades
They have for christmas
While we just have one main parade
Which is from Adelaide, and that is really good
You get at glimpse of the past with come on Aussie come on
Sydney started a great Santa race, where you run
A marathon dressed in a Santa suit
And it was brought to Canberra
And it was very successful too
There are two televised Christmas carols
From Sydney's domain and Melbourne's Meyer music bowl
Yes, if you see the great ocean road and then have a look
At the grampians, you will have a great time
And there are some great surf carnivals on various beaches here
Showing that footy and cricket, is not all we have
We love to drink, sometimes too much
But we are out to have a good time
A ball, we are ready to party this Australia day
Australian sons, oh let us rejoice
But we need to include women too
Australians all let us rejoice
With Tony Abbott wanting to destroy us
AS OUR BELOVED PRIME MINISTER OH YEAH A HEAP
We are aussie through and through
So when we go our on Australa day
We watch the fireworks, yes we are having a big ball of fun
In the country of Australia

I love Australia it looks fine to me   mate


You see Australia is very cool
There are a lot of fun things to do here
You can go down to Sydney"s beaches
Like Bondi, Manly or even Coogee
You can see if you can run faster
Than the best at city 2 surf
It puts Sydney on the Australian map
And we also have our great sporting games
Like cricket, tennis, AFL and the two rugby codes
If you go to the USA, you'll see so many parades
They have for christmas
While we just have one main parade
Which is from Adelaide, and that is really good
You get at glimpse of the past with come on Aussie come on
Sydney started a great Santa race, where you run
A marathon dressed in a Santa suit
And it was brought to Canberra
And it was very successful too
There are two televised Christmas carols
From Sydney's domain and Melbourne's Meyer music bowl
Yes, if you see the great ocean road and then have a look
At the grampians, you will have a great time
And there are some great surf carnivals on various beaches here
Showing that footy and cricket, is not all we have
We love to drink, sometimes too much
But we are out to have a good time
A ball, we are ready to party this Australia day
Australian sons, oh let us rejoice
But we need to include women too
Australians all let us rejoice
With Tony Abbott wanting to destroy us
TOO BAD JULIA AND KEVIN WEREN’T ANY MATCH BUT
We are aussie through and through
So when we go our on Australa day
We watch the fireworks, yes we are having a big ball of fun
In the country of Australia

Aussie Aussie Aussie
I am a Fair dinkum a Aussie
I love life every day
Aussie Aussie Aussie
You see I am an Aussie
Yes I watch cricket and afl and league
And like the rich I watch
The rugby union
And I cheer very loud
Aussie Aussie Aussie
I am a fair dinkum a Aussie
I am having fun
Drinking my beer eating pies
Yes I am an Aussie
And I am mighty proud of that
You see like an Aussie
I love my mum and I loved my dad
Yes and I loved a nice hot dinner
Of meat and 2 veg
Aussie Aussie Aussie
I am fair dinkum
Yes I am yes I am
I am Aussie and I am proud of it
Ok I am Aussie hear me roar
I am too cool to ignore
Yes I have fun and really have my fun
And I have fun because I am an
Aussie Aussie Aussie
And fair dinkum a Aussie
Yes that is what I am
I am an Aussie Aussie Aussie
A real battling Aussie
I am cool cause I am Aussie
To the core

It started with Richmond beating Carlton and some **** was punching people in the crowd and the tiger land song was playing very loud in the end
Collingwood put it right up to Geelong
But the cats won in the end
Melbourne for the first time were a premiership threat but the power brought that down toward the ground
By beating the demons and the crows weren’t good enough to beat the hawks at their home ground and the dogs beat the swans despite swans getting within 4 with 4 to go but the dogs were too strong and after the west coast eagles winning last years premiership the Brisbane lions were too good for them at the Gabba and despite Gold Coast keeping it close
The saints were just too good in the end and GWS got a record score in beating the bombers, we saw the bombers get bombed by the giants foot and finally the Roos weren’t good at all or was it that Fremantle were too good and that was how the afl started and I hope your team won
Well some people aren’t happy with their team but that is footy for ya

Trev is a young dude and he needs to be liked by all




Trev is having a hard time getting teased by his little bro Markie, who was a real little cool kid, and when I say cool kid, I mean he does all the popular things, and all the rough cool kids loved my his brother Markie a lot, and Trev, is just a regular joe who likes to just go down the shop and have drinks, sitting down talking about fathers who were fairly strict, mind you Trev had all respect for his father, but that doesn't stop him from ratting him off to friends over a nice cold can of coke.
You see Trev had a main best mate named Heath, who was a real friend, well at least Trev thought that as Heath always seemed to listen to him, but Heath wanted really to be a cool kid, while Trev just wanted to talk about the things he watched on the TV, and he said a lot about that new music show named Later with Jools and Trev said that Jools Holland was a real hero for music fans to see their favourite music, and I know that sounds like what cool kids talk about, Trev, who, yes I haven't told you, as autism, and he gets obsessed with music, and every conversation was about music and being cool calm and collected.
Heath, didn't want to upset Trev but really he didn't want to listen to every conversation about music, you see it drove him nuts, and Heath didn't have it in his heart to tell Trev, because it could hurt his feelings, but really Trev could throw a tantrum, and Heath cared too much for that.
So Heath became Trevs only friend and came over to his house every weekend to play with him, but when Trev bought out the toys and started to talk about baby talk, you know he was only 8, but Heath didn't speak like that, and even Trevs younger brother Markie who still was using his mothers pet name as his name at 6, he was more grown up, and Heath often tried to tease Trev with his brother, and yes they teased Trev, and Trev was getting very angry, but he kept on trying to talk to his friend, he said ' who do you want to win today in the first round of the AFL, and Markie said how about we choose the team you aren't going for, and then Trev told Heath to come to the shop to buy a drink, and talk about problems with our families, cause Trev was thinking that just because your family has enough money to support you, it still can be a nightmare trying to grow up in a family like that, and Heath, who was getting sick of Trev winging and whining, just said to him that he liked him, and despite of what he says to his brother, it is just a joke, but of course Heath is a kid, and he was a poor kid, so instead of saying what I just said he said, that is what he meant, he actually said, you know , yo, man, wots, happning, ya fams orye qui comply, which you know Trev thought was complete jibberish, and started to think that Heath didn't care about him and sort of gave him the cold shoulder treatment, and Heath sort of noticed the chemistry trying to actually understand, and said his jibberish, which was yo man wots up,
Yo dude, ya nid ta liten up, and Trev was tired of this language and started to wonder why a friend of his was talking like this, this talking isn't proper talking, it'total jibberish, sure he is nice to me, but he speaks this real spastic jibberish, it drives Trev nuts, but really, he has no friends, at school, but he was honest, in that he couldn't figure out what language he spoke, and his brother Markie who heard him wonder what these words were in his mind on his bed, Markie started to teaee his brother saying, you are so ****** *******, you don't know anything that cool kids know, you stupid old ****, he is being cool, you see, ******, he say, yo, ya doin nuttin rye, ya stipid and yo a fu-en ritarded, spaz and Trev really was hurt, mainly because of the way he said it, because really those words meanr nothing, you see they are just words to suggest that kids can tease people who are disabled, so they can't figure out their goings on.
This kind of teasing was going on for days and days, and Markie was a real cool kid, everyone liked him, yes, like all kids want, Markie was popular and then Trev and Markies father noticed that Trev was starting to feel low, and really he tried it make Trev feel better, and yes Trev was normal enough, but his autism kept him from expressing how he feels about Markie and his friends teasing him, and his father and mother sort of were starting to figure things out and when Markie got home, their parents told Markie to behave himself and stop teasing his brother, and then Markie jumped up and said yo da, u
No tes ma bro, u spikin I tun, and then their dad said, maybe, but he ain't like the other kids, he has autism, and you know he needs to feel like people care about him, and Markie  moved around saying I ain hippin he, and then their dad said, if you don't I will ground you for weeks, and Markie promised to make an effort to be nicer to Trev, and Trev really was excited, so excited, be started treating his brother Markie like Heath, and then he thought he was a cool kid, and yes, Trev wanted to treat Markie like a ******, but unknown to Trev, their dad told Markie to go easy on him, but Trev got hypo over the fact that he was a cool kid, kids even said he was like us, man, but still Trev was still too disabled to know young words, but it didn't worry him, because the time his new cool friends noticed it, they were getting too old to tease people that way, even Markie moved on in the adult way, yes maybe This is the time for Trev to be an adult and not worry about being told he's stupid, because only losers tease like Markie used to, because that is just childish, and everybody lived happy through their lives, even Trev, the end


Sent from my iPhone

you see there are problems in the world, but having patrick dunbar and greame thornes

previous life pattern, in my buddha cycle, like having thoughts of going out feeling like kids were playing games

with you, first of all, they will plant all these rats and feral cats and angry dogs, attempting to attack you

at every turn, and also back then when my place was messy, there were rats and dogs just walking in my

parents laundry, and it made me have problems cleaning my house, and i wondered why we saw rats and feral cats

and my cat muscles was also turning feral and i wanted to calm him down, and i started having my hooligans visions

coming when i went out, when i saw kids laughing or screaming in a drain in wanniassa, and this made me feel bad

i told the messiah about it, and he hated it as well, thinking, someone put the kids down there, and then i heard my

mate patrick, say, i am not mucking with the crazy person, because i was getting his clean mind giving me all sorts of delusions

making me feel, he was poisoning my mind with all these delusions like, muscles is the dingo that killed azaria, you see

i was battling my delusions, ya know, having a hard time, with a mate who hated what rupert murdoch was doing to this world

and i was wanting foxtel, but i seriously couldn’t afford, because rupert murdoch had the prices go too high, and when i had

foxtel, i remember i was in dilusion land, ya know, thinking i was getting a private jet to fly to the USA, to volunteer at a major league baseball match

and another thing too, i felt i was given USA TV, because, my delusions were putting the AFL, on the sunday night, and there was

a USAFL match, on there as well, and, i was having a great time doing volunteer work on the street, at the footy, i loved that, and i did

volunteer work at vinnies, i liked that, and i liked playing santa claus too, but i don’t do that now, i picked up all this ******* outside kingsley’s

and i got honoured for that, and i helped cook the meals at the rainbow, i loved that, but nowadays they turned it into a course, and i liked the

idea of giving the mentally ill people a good meal, and i worked at the softball field, in the 2003 masters games, and i cleared tables as well

as other jobs to do around there, i also worked at the kanga cup soccer, but i hated the last day, when they made us do crowd control, not my forte

and because my house was messy, my parents just went mmmm mmmmmm mmmmm, and this drove me crazy, i don’t want to miss out on opportunities

just because my house is untidy, i tried and cleaned my house, the best as i could, but i was hearing voices, you must help here, you must help there

you must help everywhere, the men will talk to me, if i helped people, and i loved when a man said to to me, your doing a good job, mate, and i liked

when men said, keeping busy, mate, and when i said yes, they said good, good, and when i said hello to dad, dad just did a sigh old hi, saying, i was only

like him if i cleaned my house, and yes, i know it’s important to clean my house, so i have a cleaner come Monday mornings, but, i wish there were opportunities

out there, where i can show off my novels to important people, i don’t want any cats anymore, one reason, i can’t look after a cat very well, and i could see lots of

rats and mice in my flat, and i am scared of rats and mice, because of the disease factor, and animals to me, i find, could send me to the psych ward

i know cleaning my house is important, and getting rid of rodents, is a way to clean, you see, lately i say, i got to help the poor, every time i see a poor man

give him money, cause i am not a rich *****, and i am not, and i spend money to try and give me things, i like computers, i was using the computer as a place

to display all my previous life and current life anger, but dad looked at my stories, as not very nice, but i was expressing where my anger is coming from

i want to have novels written and ideas pushed over to television, now i don’t want a cat anymore, or a dog or a mouse or a rat, i prefer to keep myself from

buying any sort of animal, because every time i am asked to do something,like take care of a cat, i go crazy, and i get cranky, cause i haven’t got a perfect life

because my parents have twisted m thoughts around in my head, if i had someone to live with, or moved to another city, with the same services, i will feel good

about myself, because i would still get the cleaning done as well have carers and i need a job, i need a job, i want to show people how to write their problems out of them

i hate being treated like a girl from bay watch, getting kidnapped by old good mates because they fucken agree with parents ruling over their kids and i don’t

because i am going to get what i want and i am not aiming too high,my stories are good enough and even this story, please leave me alone, i want the perfect life

i crave the perfect life, and as long as i don’t buy a cat, i am fine

When I was living at home, like when I first was living at home I was becoming very bad with dad untill when dad came out the back to either fix up the pool or sit in the chair or hose the garden or get rid of the weeds out from the cracks in the cement and I enjoyed watching dad work even if I wasn't working much but dad was a very busy man as he went to buy a cappuccino at the shop with his mates and blowing leaves out of the cement into the trash pack
And dad will always make sure our computers were safe like away from hacking and if we need to download a new program he will do it with no problems and I was regretting fighting dad because he helped us get in touch with the world
Which most dads don't do that much and dad used to mow the lawn and he was very friendly with the community around us
Me and my mum and dad used to go to the club to have a meal and I used to like talking to mum and dad
It was good that dad helped me because I wasn't really the best role model but I liked dad when he bought a wine called passion pop but he wasn't really wanting me to drink it because of my problem with alcohol
And also I enjoyed dad cooking the barbecue on Christmas Eve when my Aunty came with her daughters and we did a present swap and I watched the muppet family Christmas on Foxtel and then I went out to talk to dad while he cooked it
When I played santa at Vinnies
I often made Christmas Eve the last day and I went home and got myself ready for Christmas Eve present exchanging and I wanted to be around my family so much I put their television on the Christmas carols from Melbourne and dad liked to comment on it even if he was making fun of hifive when they were on stage and I liked dad doing that and when the grand finals were on afl and nrl I always told dad the score and we went to the club for dinner
After the afl grand final
And on nye dad me and mum went to see the new year in with people from my bowling team and we danced as well
Well we partied too
You see the sad news is dad is dead but I liked everything we did together and I know I should move on but that is easy to say when people don't judge you
Anyway at Christmas I think of the BBQ that dad liked to cook
To make our Christmas great
Now dad has moved on to Betty Campbell and I might not see dad in this life ever again
But I still keep up to date with the Campbell's on instagram
To understand why dad died
I wasn't the easiest son to get on with

I bounce on the ground
I hear the crowds deafening sound.
Someone picks me up and drops me on their boot
Towards another man’s hands is my route
He takes me in his chest like a baby
And with his boot sets me free
I soar through the blinding light
I hear and see the crowd ignite
My bruises ****
But the crowd's joy makes me heal
I am hurt
But in the umpire’s hands, I am happy
And Then
It all starts again

psych ward dramas




ok, i believe i am here today

to let people have fun

i get leave every day to keep

an eye on the world

so i can help, in the way that i do

i know people can get sick of me

saying i am cronus and ****

but i do that, so i can save people on earth

so we don’t bring the old days back

cause a lot of those criminals

you can see in the glossy magazines

they look like they ae copying me

and that sort of made me feel

that i have created a world

that is full of death and yobbism

jake does a guitar solo which makes

the crowd really cheer out his name

jake jake jake oi oi oi

now, if i can get out of here

i really want to go to adelaide

so i can be in the christmas city of the world

and i want to support the adelaide crows

and go to the AFL grand final

i also wanna do my art

and profit from my writing

you see i really want to

make this psych ward a happy place to get well in

cause, really, i am still a kid

cause, to myself, i never had a good education, and i am prepared

to do that again, cause

i want that whole sill nonsense, ya know

like i am not mucking with you mate neh

, and i hate people saying your like us now man

and your not an old dogie, mate

and every kid, i thought

were trying to be cool

to make us all tease my daddy

now i was having fun

but i am 46, and i need a perfect change

and, still, ya know, i am cool

jake really stole the show with a great guitar solo

now, i want my parents to visit me

that’ll be kinda fun

but i don’t want to be a client, all my life

and i want to stop phedaphelia, cause it’s bad

i don’t care about what used to happen, i know

buddha wouldn’t like that

ya need to respect kids ya know

it’s just that it’s fucken hard to stop a kidnapper

and that is why buddha tries to make peace with this whole situation

and yesterday, i explained

that about 63 australians jumping from a plane

and i portrayed it as every victim of school shootings  coming back to earth

nobody dies ya know, we are all here there and everywhere

the cartoonist said, this is a cartooning class, not a psychology class or a vision class

i would like to teach people about space travel via sleep, like i do

cause, man, this is ****** fun and i do do a show on channel 44

and if people complain about me

i will say, get with the times ya ***

jake did a big guitar solo which gave a freezing blizzard to mercury

Oh your shy very shy
You will never get the job you want because you are very shy
You want to be s s baker
Too flaming hard
You want to be lawyer
Too flaming bad
You want to be a doctor
I shake too much
I want to be a super market packer
Too ****** cheap
I want yo be an actor
Keep laughing when the teacher is showing me the ropes I want to be a waiter
But I need to understand
There is not much money involved
I want to be a security guard
Too fucken weak
I want to be s police man
Not in the eight headspace
I want to be an AFL. Player
But I need to be signed on
I hear oh your shy very shy
I am cool and you are shy
The only way to achieve your dreams in come out of your shell and i ain't gay though
I want to succeed

I am a man ya see
Better than everyone else
I am a real real man who enjoys
His life in every way that he can
I watch the footy and I have a kick and I watch a concert
And enjoy every bit
People say I ain't a man
Because I sit on my own
And watch tv or YouTube
And enjoy life you see
I am a real man who loves fine music just as long as it is heavy metal
I will go to poetry slams and
Slam out a poem which is liked by the men who drink and smoke
I used to do that but now I am reformed just like a real man is
I drank my beer and smoked my ciggys and that is what made me happy
You see I am a real man and when I see someone doing it tough I throw some money his way
I am a real man who loves his life watching the afl and nrl
And in summer I watch the baseball and big bash cricket
And mate I feel like a real man
I am just a reformed character of a man I am radically awesome dudes
I am a real man

Of football I was once a fan,
Can't escape it, in lucky land,
The AFL footy finals grand,
Fandom from birth,
To the grave, for what its worth,
Does it only happen here?
Old Melbourne town, fandom cheers!

Isn't football such an event?
Listen to the philosopher's lament,
Old Socrates barracked for his team,
In the AFL, worst you've ever seen,
Socrates gazed at the replay,
Groaned, "We lost again!"
So he drank hemlock and gin,
Slit his wrists, did himself in,
Drowned in his phony spa,
His ghost calls down from afar,
"The premiership is what is meant!"
Woe, Socrates' eternal lament!

The coronavirus frustrates me
Seeing people who normally don’t care about looking after themselves
Getting really nervous about the outcome to what is happening
Seeing there is no sporting events
On except for virtual sports
Which isn’t really that bad
But I was just starting to understand about life
And this stupid pandemic happened
I watch shows about horses and love in the show heartland and I love how they help people who are poor become great citizens
I don’t want to be fully functional
I just want to have fun
And the coronavirus is stopping that
I remember saying Aussie Aussie Aussie
And the kids went oi oi oi
As if I was a normal person
But now I don’t see that
Cause there is no sports
And if sports comes back soon
There will be no spectators
I want to really love life
But this coronavirus is slowly stopping that
I am watching Kevin ****** Wilson
And his daughter perform their YouTube Facebook and Instagram shows I never thought I would like it
But he swears in a really funny way
He hates political correctness and so do I
And I watch living room concerts
And I think they are slowly finding a vaccine to stop it
Though I really want it gone
I personally think nobody can give me what I want now
Because there is nothing good on
I ain’t doing art
I ain’t putting my art up for show
In exhibitions
I am watching virtual afl on YouTube which I am enjoying
But I want everything back
I love to watch parades and they will cancel them because of the pandemic
*******
I am trying to get up early even if I go to bed later than normal
I want this whole virus to end
I am sick of watching the news because there isn’t anything new they tell us
I want to keep up to date though
So I watch it a bit
But I like the community rallying around to help each other
And I like the community going out to have fun
There is nothing on now because of this stupid pandemic
Because people didn’t listen
I love watching AFL
So I watch people play AFL revolution on YouTube to see footy being played
And seeing crowds cheer for their teams even if there is no games on
It is still footy and still fun to watch
Please Athena help find a vaccine
So people can
Go on holidays
Go to concerts
Get the footy back on
Make it not last till Christmas
Bring the movies back to the cinemas
Not **** many more people
I am just getting frustrated
Because there is nothing on
I was looking for work but I am finding the being home for people to ring me hard because I am not getting what I want
I like going to watch the convoy for cancer
Trucks and motorbikes going on parade and good artists performing for us
PLEASE BUDDHA ATHENA GOD MOHAMMAD
FIND A VACCINE
To stop the pandemic
PLEASE END covid 19

There is no longer any excuse.
In fact, there hasn’t been for a
very long time.

We have seen bloodshed
on soil around the world.  
Over one million lives,
in the name of
freedom,
democracy,
capitalism,
& I can’t quite recall the others
at the moment.

We have connected
through time and space.
We heard and we watched
Bell & Lindbergh
Ford & Armstrong
Gates & Jobs
transform the very fabric of our realities,
uncovering expanding realms
of possibility.

We have healed and protected
our fragile bodies.
Decades ago,
Mr. Salk became part of evening
prayers.
We began having less babies,  
and we marveled for 112 days
at the beating of the first
artificial heart.
Wondering or not
whether new bionic inclinations
had affected our humanity.

We have evolved
collective creeds
through unexpected revolutionaries
and in spite of dragging feet.
While AFL & CIO
became household names,
Ms. Anthony and Dr. King
made us cry
and shake
and question
our very foundations.

And yet,
after 165 years of change,
I say, with a heavy heart,
and millions of people,
and billions of dollars,
and a dream,
that the 1850’s schoolhouse
has been only
feebly & perfunctorily
remodeled.

From their graves,
Mr. Mann & Mr. Dewey ask,
“What will it take?”

I just got home after seeing the documentary movie called the Australian dream which is about Adam Goodes who was my favourite player back in the day and I saw that he was a victim of racial bullyism which was discraceful I never knew that, that kind of racism exists in this modern times and I learnt that people weren’t looking at it as being racist but they were being racist and those people need to be taught a lesson in being moral, I never watched the footy show afl much because it was boring but Sam Newman needs to be taught a big lesson in racism because what he did was racist and Adam Goodes was just sticking up for himself because these words really hurt him, I just remember Goodesy for the great player he is, and I continued to support him as he really won the match for Sydney swans and people shouldn’t hate him because he is black because nobody booed tony Lockett and Warwick capper even if they had weird ways as well Lockett used to nudge a bit and capper used to wear short shorts and they supported them and I em not against these players though I just think it is a bit low to yell out racial words to Goodes I think the country that we live in should honour aborigines after all they are the founders of our land long before captain cook came to invade it
I thought Australian dream was great and I recommend it for anyone who wants to honour the founders of our land and the greatest player Sydney swans ever had, I think it was cool that he got Australian of the year and in fact I drew a picture of him as Australian of the year and he won two Brownlow medals and he was the best player around I remember him taking his marks and scoring goals what a legend of the game he was
I do recommend Australian dream to anyone who wants to stop being racist and to others who really likes goodesy like me, I am not the only one who had him as my favourite player
I am totally sure of that
Sydney Sydney Sydney oi oi oi
On ya goodsey

The after life part 7



Cronus is having a busy times bringing people back to life and he had 33 year old Brian Buchanan who was a hard worker, he works as a landscaper during the day, helping people get their gardens sorted out and he worked every dinner time at the roadhouse, which is a homeless shelter where he helps out at and after that on Tuesday and Wednesday he does performing arts at the community centre and on Thursday he plays tenpin bowling where he has won many trophies and in summer he volunteered at the cricket and basketball by standing at the gate letting and not letting people in and at winter he does the bbq for the Southport sharks neafl team in Aussie rules where he occasionally gets free footy tickets for Brisbane lions and also works at the masters games where he has met so many great olympians and doing all this made him feel good about himself but he was all burnt out doing all this, he collapsed on the road and passed away and Cronus said, Brian Buchanan what or who do you want to be in your next life and Brian said I want to play little league baseball for whoever they choose for me and I want a family who respects the decisions I make and if you think it is a good idea, I want to bring afl football to Jupiter, I have a team name called the goofy gorillas which is cool enough don’t you think and Cronus said yes that would be good, as long as you don’t burn yourself out
And Brian said no I won’t burn myself out and Cronus sent him to Buddha for a reincarnation talk and then to Athena for a soul check and after that Brian went to Jupiter to work on creating the afl team, the goofy gorillas and after that Cronus had another soul named Harry symes who died by getting hit by a car on his way to work by a drunk driver and Cronus said it was horrible how you passed away, so who or what do you want to be in your next life and Harry said I want to be good enough to be a trainee policemen and I want my spirit to make me a good policeman and Cronus said there is no such thing as a good policeman but I could give you to a family who is ready to learn how to not break the law, so it will be your fault if you make mistakes and Harry said ok, but I don’t want to make mistakes though, I just want to lock away people like the driver that killed me and Cronus said policemen get killed, I hope you know and Harry said yes I know but it is an important job so Cronus sent him to Buddha for a spirit check and then to Athena for a soul check and then Harry went to Saturn to have a methane smoothie before he comes to a world where methane is deadly and then Cronus asked Yvonne Simmons who died on the operating table after collapsing at work, who or what do you want to be in your next life and Yvonne said Just send me anywhere, I want to play sport and do concerts at school and outside school and do a few other cool stuff, please I want to be normal and not stupid and Cronus said you ain’t stupid you could do anything you want to do, and I could see you are a live in the moment kind of person so just relax as I send you to Buddha to talk about the best parents for you and then a soul check with Athena and after that Yvonne went to mercury to meet her deceased boyfriend and they had a good conversation about future lives and Yvonne went back to Buddha to ask if she could be in the same family as her boyfriends next life and Buddha said fine but you might have to just be a cousin and Yvonne said that is fine with me, thanks and Cronus sent her to be her boyfriends cousin and in 9 months she will be back to earth

The after life part 6


After sending each soul to their next lives, Cronus has been totally busy and his next soul was afl player jack reinstein who played for Ipswich in the 1960s and made himself a lifetime member of the Brisbane lions for playing in the QAFL back then, jack died peacefully in hospital at the age of 88 and when he entered Cronus said what or who do you want to be in your next life and jack said I would love to play afl footy in the Auskick to see if my spirit in my last life can make me grow stronger in the game
I would like to be good enough to be a footy player because I am spiritually good enough to play this game and Cronus said yes you were good at play and you were a good coach as well, and jack said even if I start up in the USA to play basketball it will be fine, my soul was made to play sport
Please please please let me tough and skilful enough to play sport, I used to get drunk a bit as a kid and there are a few things I did I am not happy with but I never killed anybody nor did I hold anybody hostage, just a few drink driving fines but I paid my debt to society and I should be able to play more sport a lot of sport and Cronus said yes I remember that but I am not judging you and Cronus sent jack to Athena for a soul check and to Buddha to make sure he gets what he wants and then jack went to start coaching a team on Jupiter called cosmos kings and then serial killer Noel thengate who killed 123 people between the 1950s and 1980s and when he was arrested in 1992 he was sentenced to life imprisonment till he died just now and Cronus said I am going to not give you a choice who you are, you will have cerebral palsy in your next life and Noel said ok but you are putting the future of the world into sadness but Cronus said no I am not, you did and if you want to improve your next life’s condition you have to be a good person up here in the cosmos but if you don’t you won’t live very much longer ok and Noel said but if I died I will come up to you again for another life and Cronus said yes but the same old ****** life untill you could prove to me you have changed and then Cronus said because you made the emotional part of the world really bad back then so you are being punished for your crimes and Noel said but you don’t want to destroy a baby’s life for my crimes and Cronus said yes I do because what you did back then was awful and dreadful, so I am not giving you what you want, and Noel said I went to church in prison so I should be in heaven but Cronus said yes but you still punched a few people in prison while you were in church and Noel said ok but they were worst people than me mate and Cronus said yes go to Jupiter and cause a hurricane because that is what your soul wants to do and Noel said crap mate and Cronus said you will go to Athena for a soul check and then Noel went to Jupiter and a hurricane hit California but Noel Denys wanting to do that but Cronus said I am not reversing my decision and then dean Marlow who was 45 died in a workshop fire came up to Cronus and Cronus said what do you want to be in your next life and dean said I want to be a seagull because I want free fish and chips without having to worry about it, please give me that, cause 46 years ago you gave me this ****** life after I came off my horse as a little girl, and Cronus said, ok I will see what I can do, but being a seagull is a tough job, you have no strong muscles to protect unless you Charge over on people and dean said yes I know but I live for fish and chips so I want to attempt to steal them from the humans and Cronus said no seagulls don’t do it like that, you won’t survive like that, so I will make you a seagull but because of your attitude I will give you problems because you need to change, mate and dean said ok make me a rich man
I am going to powerful, no matter where you send me and Cronus said no you will suffer, mainly because of your attitude, the world is about helping people by mending each blade of grass one by one and if you don’t know what that means you need to change and Cronus sent him to Buddha for a morality check and then to Athena for a soul check but the decision wasn’t what dean was wanting, so he headed to Saturn to get high on methane and dance to bon Scott in the club hoping he gets what he wants in the end
While Cronus was thinking as he sent more souls to where they wanted, hoping dean Marlow gets to where he is needed

A nice cold beer
For a nice hot day
Watching baseball and cricket
AFL and nrl and nfl and
A band in the club
Getting down to boogie
And say party party party
People sharing a nice cold beer
On this nice hot day
Drinking it down to get you drunk and party all day long
Watching buddy franklin score
The winning goal
It can happen
Watching you favourite baseball
Star hit a home run
In the match or the home run derby
A nice cold beer on a nice hot day
Feeling ****** as a parrot yeah
Kung fu fighting playing in the background and we party like crazy from start to finish
Party party party
Right till the very finish
Yes we enjoy this nice cold beer
On this nice hot day
We sure do

I can't sing but I am still cool
I have fun in every part of my life
I sing how can you tell me your lonely and then go uhhh uhhh uhh
Awful
I can't sing but I am still cool
I know part of the union is political and I know Hannah Montana is inspiring
And I know old songs well, I understand a bit of why they were so popular
I know pink shoelaces was a boppy old song from way back then
But if I try and them I go uhhh uhhhh uhhhb
I eat hotdogs at the football
And u sing songs while doing the BBQ and I sound awful
But I just say I can't sing but I am cool
I sing the Giants theme song in the afl and I sing every other theme song and I sounded like an old fog horn
I can't sing but I am still cool
And it doesn't bother me at all

I can't sing but I am still cool
I have fun in every part of my life
I sing how can you tell me your lonely and then go uhhh uhhh uhh
Awful
I can't sing but I am still cool
I know part of the union is political and I know Hannah Montana is inspiring
And I know old songs well, I understand a bit of why they were so popular
I know pink shoelaces was a boppy old song from way back then
But if I try and them I go uhhh uhhhh uhhhb
I eat hotdogs at the football
And u sing songs while doing the BBQ and I sound awful
But I just say I can't sing but I am cool
I sing the Giants theme song in the afl and I sing every other theme song and I sounded like an old fog horn
I can't sing but I am still cool
And it doesn't bother me at all

I can't sing but I am still cool
I have fun in every part of my life
I sing how can you tell me your lonely and then go uhhh uhhh uhh
Awful
I can't sing but I am still cool
I know part of the union is political and I know Hannah Montana is inspiring
And I know old songs well, I understand a bit of why they were so popular
I know pink shoelaces was a boppy old song from way back then
But if I try and them I go uhhh uhhhh uhhhb
I eat hotdogs at the football
And u sing songs while doing the BBQ and I sound awful
But I just say I can't sing but I am cool
I sing the Giants theme song in the afl and I sing every other theme song and I sounded like an old fog horn
I can't sing but I am still cool
And it doesn't bother me at all

I might have been a yeah mate yeah kid when I was young
I visited oldies and I didn’t hang
With many cool people back then I might have been a nerd back then I liked programming computer games and I did a lot of different things
I might have been a tad different to the others but deep
Down I thought that made me cool
I mucked with my friends at school and I found it hard to muck with bullies and I liked to much with my family like playing games and watching television
And I performed in school plays
And learnt to sing songs like songs that were pretty much in the hippy age I remember mucking around at the mall being cool and I was hearing voices, well I think they were of them treating me like a nerdy yeah mate yeah kid just because I watched television with my mates and family I played basketball with my friend at the Southside basketball stadium abs had a drink afterwards I thought that was cool and I played bingo with my grandmother and my friends and even if it is an oldie thing
I was probably a bit of a geek
I might have been a bit shy at family parties where I just played cricket with dice when others were enjoying themselves and I went to concerts like from red tape and ac/dc and Bryan Adams and def Leopard and the pigs in Merimbula but I had a few social issues where I must be the coolest one there and I was I think and I teased my father sometimes but it didn’t get me far, you see I might have been a geek I might have been a nerd I might have been a yeah mate yeah kid, but I thought I was pretty cool, because I watch the footy afl and nrl and cricket and baseball and soccer and basketball I like to celebrate Christmas even if I am not a Christian, no, I am a Buddhist and I feel different from the world but it ain’t my intention though, I just believe in coming back after you die, rather than this stupid heaven ******* and
I know they believe in nirvana and I know what goes on up there cause you can go there in dreams
I might be a geek nerd or yeah mate yeah kid, but I am a writer artist and YouTube presenter

i like watching youtube
but not shows that i hate
people tried to convince me to get netflix
to make my life so good
so now i am sharing it with my mum
and i gave her the money
i watched shows like
good witch
*** education
baby
heartland
the ranch
one day at a time
fuller house
shameless
greenleaf
dear white people
mr iglesias
and a movie titled night school
and many many more
netflix is very good
the shows are great
and it gets me away from the crap
on free to air television and for sport i have kayo
where i can watch
Indian premier league cricket
AFL
NRL
BBL and WBBL CRICKET women and men
Aleague soccer
NFL
NHL
rugby union
baseball
basketball NBA NBL
you see i get good use out of netflix and kayo
and way cheaper than FOXTEL
i am a cool adult, man