Thought I knew its meaning!
Gee I’ve felt it to the core!
More than once that’s for sure!
Ahhh but missing my family!
I can define this with assertive measure!
I know what love is!
For without fail you are there!
I miss you all, for every moment we don’t share!
I’ve said this before one should not waste any opportunity to tell your loved ones how much they mean!
So for all my loved ones far and wide!
A tribute to you!
In a way I know best!

I LOVE YOU!

Her heart beats true to all her existence!
She is love itself!
It is real and has sheer persistence!
She'd walk her feet raw if that's what it took!

She instills her values true to her core!
Always kind!
Even when the rod were to make my backside sore!
Always listening!
Even when time is little, she is there!
Always caring!
A heart so strong, but always love to give no matter where!
A mentor!
If advice be sought, she'd be my choice!
A Mom
There to make affect, with the kindest of voice!

My solace
My matriarch

MY MOM

Oh!
You might find them feeble!
You might see a lie!
Yet more true words never spoken!
Oh yes!
My life without you is like an arid lifeless desert!
Where once a beautiful Paradise thrived!
Now only tumbleweed to blow on by!
They be the people I put this mask on each day to portray a person!
Who be somewhat normal!
However!
I be not a person anymore!
No!
All that be left this lifeless shell
Yes, no more an empty shell of longing!
Longing for what was once the only happiness I’d want for!
Yes you might see it as feeble!
But ill love you till the day I die!
©️

Oh what yonder lies only treachery and deceit!

But if not for our Moms?
What would we be without this wonderful guardian?

That just through her melodious voice puts our hearts at peace.

There be wolves out there of human kind, the worst of all yet!
For teeth far from sharp!
It be their tongues and sinister ways!
Far more razor like I’d say!
She’d put herself in harm’s way!
A selfless soul so pure!

A mom for sure!

She shows her back to the wild and scornful beings!
And shelters all harm from her child !
A Hero no less
More than just a mother i’d say!
Yes she’d be a Mom!
Oh yes!

Oh thank you Mom !

A hero oh yes!

I know mine is!

Oh how I long for you! Oh how I paint a picture of you over and over ! In my mind that no artist can truly depict cause your beauty is not skin deep!

So the word Something keeps popping up!

So I've sat and thought this one through, as we survive relationships (some being nothing short of horror stories lol) and recover somewhat stronger and move on, we tend to give little of our hearts away in no hurry ! However when we do give in and say that four letter word, LOVE, we then give far more of ourselves to this, from a far deeper understanding of it in truth!

So that four letter word that so many times we become petrified of that is so often just taken for granted, has now become SOMETHING !
Yes as much as I try hold back from the reality of my emotions, in no uncertain terms it can't be denied ! There is SOMETHING !

There needs to be something!
There has to be something!

Why SOMETHING ?

Cause you really are quite something ! Quite an artist at theft, for as hard as I've tried to hold back and not give in, I catch myself dreaming and realize the reason for my dream is You ! As much as I don't want to admit! And there you gone and stolen another piece of my heart!   Thief lol

To my Beautiful treasures, I don't deserve!
My Three princesses, you are flawless next to me!
So pure and true!
For you, I carry on through life with all its let downs!
I have to persevere!  
God gave me three blessings I don't deserve!
Many a letdown Dad I've been!
A feeble dad I know!
But I resound my love to you!
For the only love im allowed to keep!
Every time I enter relationships, I only land up hurting! Either myself or the other person!
So to you and my God, I’ll have forever!
Please forgive my somewhat hopeless attempts at times, but if not for you my heart is spent!
Love you with all my heart as feeble as it may be!
As simple as I might act and not do enough!
Call enough or even be enough!
I love you!
Beyond my selfish pain!
And I’ll do my utmost to hurt you never again!

They enter our lives with sinister plots that we do not see.
For we choose to be real, and expect others to show the same virtues,
We forget that in our strength of sincerity and,
Stature of what society should've been made to be,
We fall prey to that, far worse than wolves in sheep's clothing.
They be of human form, but we have hearts,
They be the acidic species,
Just there to use,
Just there for their gain,
A putrid lot,
Just there to watch their works erode the effect.,
The effect shown through a simple yet ernest smile appreciating friends,
Wake up! see through their semblance,
They pass off as friendship.
This title they claim be not theirs,
Oh no they are to be of that,we choose to dispose of.
They are of the past.
We will always see more like them,
Who enter our journeys,
For we are free loving,
Giving,
Caring,
Selflessly making acquaintances who should carry the title of My friendship with,
Ardent fastosus.
A title worthy of not much to those who know me not.
But as I value My  Friends see their sincerity,
They too see me for the friend I am proud to be.
A title I regard with much dignity for they bless me with their hearts open and call me Friend!
So begone you foul lot of underhanded scoundrels you have no place here amongst friends.
We know the worthy,as we see ourselves in them.
You get in, yes for we do not look out for the likes of you,
I know not how to be that vile insipid parasite.
Rather,we seek people we can look up to.
People we can learn to better from.
Who speak not with intent to harm,
Or just where they are to gain.
Finding joy in others hurt,
No we seek a superior being who is unlike you.
Someone really pure.
Oh just no false pretenses,
Oh and, so this all was not actually about those unworthy no rather,
The contrary!
To them an ode!
A tribute to my Friend's.

How awesome it was, for She held my heart!
From the minute we met I couldn't hold back, I had no boundaries!

Oh she held my heart !

With sweet passion filled ******* so Hot, we could fire up a thousand foundries!

Oh she held my heart oh yeah!

She has Beauty she has! And wows all in her day!
With a ravenous smile, I just can't resist!

Oh she held my heart oh yeah!oh yeah she did!

I sit here pondering with all that's passed why does this feeling persist ?

Trouble I see it so clearly at times, with greatest of fears I have to admit!

She held my heart and how awesome we were!

Even with sheer stubbornness and greatest of will!

Thing is she held my heart and SO does still !

2:am at McDonald’s drive through
After a night out on the town
We found him, Jacobus,
a sorry sight! To say the least!
Ripped our hearts apart he did!
A baby in most parents eyes
He looked 15
Probably a fib in saying he is 17
No shoes on his feet
Recycling cool drink cans
To earn a living
A family of 3 living in a box
On a vacant lot
So we got him in our car
The love of my life ran up to the apartment.
We fashioned him with shoes n socks
A jersey and blanket!
And 3 times in cash of what a good days recycling can bring.
Reluctantly given not knowing where it shall be spent?
Not welcoming this child in for we can’t risk him returning with his dad or the likes!
Desperate people do desperate things!
None of this consoles my soul
No child should be subjected to life as such!
Fending for two adults collecting recycling materials in the early hours of the morning, to get the best out of the trash we discard!
He will probably be Back on the street shortly after we left him at the vacant lot
A footpath through the overgrown bush
The last we saw of him.
A child should be guided, a mentor to ease his path into this cruel world!
How often we take so much for granted
Complaining with a need that cant truelly  be justified!
No, I appreciate that now!

I can’t leave this there! how I don’t know but, a difference in this child’s life I have to make!
I know I can’t save every homeless family.
I know !
But God would not have led my path past this child without cause!
A route I am yet to define!
However a real chance he deserves!
So pray, all of faith, I ask!
For my choice of action
Is seek his guidance
For I know it’s his task set for me!
I’ll be on my knees
In appreciation for what I have
In hope for this poor soul

Pray I ask!
For there be more power in prayer than we realize!
Oh
Pray please do

Sorry
Think i lost this one hopelesly
The fight be done!
Yes you sad insipid strugle im done with you!
Oh but only missery to spew!
Damaged i cant recover!
I cant fix this thing!
Oh was it ever mine to have !
Sorry
Not as it be said but for who actually depend and rely on me!
My true failure!
Not going to be there!
Not much to depend on anyhow!
Sorry!
Comfortably Numb

If I could only turn back time
I’d do most of it the same but I know my mistakes
I’d improve of course!
But mostly hearts I’ve hurt
If possible I’d do things better there
More time with my loved ones
If only I could!
And of course cut out those who do only but take from you!
I can if you allow me to direct the future better though sure we can get a lot out still
We are never certain of tomorrow!
We need to secure today!
Don’t discard of time you could have done so much more with!
Be extravagant with those words I love you!
But more than that show them as much!
Spend it wisely and  extravagantly on those who really matter!
I know I have that in my heart I hope I get to fulfill it in my life to come!
Oh if only Could I know I Can!
©️

To a few it might seem like a hundred years or maybe more!

But not that long ago a cloud was Just water molecules in the sky!
Now it's virtual storage on which we so rely.

A man to space, a far fetched dream!

But aside from technology have we grown?

Our societies riddled with rot
Corrupt and ****** governments
Crippled morals
Troubled youth
No path of truth

Bring back our safety
Bring back our innocence
Bring back integrity
Bring back our freedom

Be it creed or color that separates us, our manners, upbringing and choices may differ oh so far.
Those are only cultures!
Used against us as they manipulate and twist the truth those Horrid political vultures!

But one thing if you worth your salt, we share one common fact!
Our forefathers and their fathers built our societies on one common denominator!

We call on this Maiden who society has been forgotten!
Oh bring her back along with all her offspring from justice, truth and sincerity!
Oh to say but a few!

ETHICS WE CALL ON YOU!

The one true core value we know we can rebuild from!
We can can start by being true !

Let's fix our riddled world oh yes it starts with me and you!

Let's take back our values!

And Be our fathers pride!

Or once again are you just another only along for the ride!!!

How those we care about must feel so neglected !
For we live our lives like a rambling whirlwind, and only the whispering tail ends brushing past through theirs momentarily reminding them who we are, and how much we mean to each other, this whispering wind that softly rustles through the bulrushes and reads making sweet music from nature itself is no less important than its great big brother, but if we slow down we can hear their sweet music if we'd just listen,
Make time for those you care for! Even if it's just a quick hi or a silly joke let them know you there and haven't forgotten!
Before our lives are gone and and we just memories to be blown away by the whirlwind TIME !


I CARE !
YOU MATTER !
YOU ARE SO AWESOME !
I MISS YOU !

Oh
Oh how i hurt use it to keep me alive let me feel,
Let me feel the pain so I can feel alive again,

Oh how hate you insipid thing they call you life ,oh how you a contradiction to your very own name , oh how I hate you bitter thing,
You supposed to mean joy , love, and beginnings all anew,
Yet you spew out misery, strife, grief and turmoil, love ? How few ?
Oh how I hate you insipid thing,

Bring on the pain so I can know I'm alive cause I bleed ,
Oh how I hate you in your every deed,
You trample my heart like a drought riddled field for the only to flourish the Ravens greed!

A new venture of the heart
I climb out this protective shell
To once again explore the dark caverns where our hearts us do lead!
Where we often fall prey to our weaker side
They called emotions
Often they be poisoned or attacked by the cancerous Big scary monsters
Deciet
Dishonesty
Treacherous they be in all their forms
Some Dont survive
We never be as before
Hmmm
Scary places our hearts us do lead

They say nothing ventured nothing gained!
No pain no gain!

But I'm no child and I chose her for her heart!
As I once again put mine on the line
Seems like a sure bet!
Well then I'm going all in!
For the jackpot, all in I say!
©️

Poetry be a vehicle

For me it's transported me from that dismal place of days so Grey
Their hue so dark became the tarmac for life's emotional highway

For writing be a vehicle taken us through many a dreary day

Then it dropped me at a the curb of happiness
I only needed to step out
To run down its pathways through color filled gardens
Roses n tulips be where grimace and decay once resided
Melodies and laughter now replacing tears n sorrow
I saw love as a fallacy now a possibility
Poetry be a vehicle

Mine be a chariot with gold n silver
Now boasting hope n joy out proudly

No more just getting from point a to b  I stop and smell them roses and love life's journey

For poetry be a vehicle

To prosper in life, for many would mean,
Wealth
Status
Career
And so the list will stretch on!

My hearts desires achieved would they also not deem me prosperous?

So to be me the true prosperity be,
My faith to show fruits of what i'd love to achieve for my Jesus!

My family bond
Hearing I love you
And saying it often too
Our loved ones gladness in hearing from us, wow it be paycheck never turned down!
Knowing my love is endeared and never taken for granted! I love true and with all I am!
Often leading to heartache!
That be a thing of the past in my hearts prosperity!
For my hearts prosperity would be for ever and true!, And only written in love
With a bit of faith I am certain, Gods path for me will be a prosperous one indeed!
Happy not just a state of mind, for it be a place
Oh so much so it’s a place, a time, a destination and a goal
It be where we should reside

When you walk into my home I want you to feel it!
When you look at me my heart will show it! For happy is where my heart resides!

Happy I need for me first!
If those that hearts are set in unhappiness they need know it remains their choice!

My Happiness is mine! no one else can steal it or navigate it!
I am the captain of this ship!

Oh happiness is mine!
I own it’s title deed

As a lush garden, I aim to keep it in bloom!
So who ever should visit even a fleeting moment in my life

Should know happiness be mine!
©

So today my first visit to Dr Steven Eppel ( a physiatrist )
As I have identified issues I have with trust.
And hence have managed to swallow that ego and take on my flaws!
Oh yes we all have them and it’s how we choose to better ourselves or not in identifying, admitting and taking a corrective course that really matters!

I have come a long way with great heartaches and many a mental anguish!
He has helped me identify a great accomplishment I have achieved already that I feel with maturity I have learnt Humility for only in humility can we acknowledge our flaws !
Humility sounds so diminutive in its description, yet holds so much value in character!
I identify with scriptural teachings, of God teaching us humility,
Now I understand its depth far more.
Through humility I have put pride aside and accepted help!
Through humility I allow growth!
Through humility I will find healing!
Accepting growth that with time allows trust to be forged to bring far stronger unions than we have allowed before!
Healing brings new freedom to the soul!

If anything is to be learnt from this.
Firstly never be to proud to learn, to see your flaws and accept help, there need be no shame at all, however I for one admire those striving to better themselves!

Hardly through this nightmare!
Haven’t even left yet!
And she’s lining the next culprit up ?

How do you ignore the wounds here today
ready to let someone in!
You in a vulnerable time
So easy to say just what you want to hear!

But more than than
If your hearts on the line should you not allow it to heal learn and grow stronger?

Oh I know the vulnerable turns to lonely and the lonely turns to miserable!

But we stronger than we allow ourselves to believe!

Our happiness belongs to us
We determine our own happiness
So although a partner who is well matched
Can compliment the person you are and make you happier
But first it’s happy you should be already!
©️

A struggle! so just keeping it together!
Flustered and torn!
Lonely if I don’t reach out!
Emotions run through me like riptides in a vicious squall!
Not sure whether to run or hide!
Or what or where to next!
First thing everyone has always said just breathe!
Yeah if I did that from the start!
Wouldn’t burn to do just that, just breathe!
Reality kicks in, no worries I squander my soul on! can change the outcome of others choices!
Besides
I need to take ownership of my actions and face the consequences!
That needn’t render me powerless though!
For i still, have prayer!
And i am a great person!
And aim to be so much more!
I just need to show everyone i remember how to be me!
©️

Giving
Received with love!
Hearts a glowing!
Joyous smiles so true!
Filling a need!
These kids
They don’t know greed!
Fulfilling what any child should have!
To think how often we take so much for granted!
From a heart so pure, a wish was born!
Yes child of nine!
Saw the need for children in a orphanage, to be kept warm!
And so it began!
We deliver veered a week later,
For her plight was heard!
You saw her heart, true and pure!
Devout to her cause!
I am blessed to learn from this young soul!
Oh how so many can take a lesson here!
This would love!
Yes as it should be!
If we treated our peers, neighbors and the next person with a love like this!
Oh what could this world be?
No war!
No greed filled crimes!
No sinister inhumane acts!
Maybe a far fetched dream!
But I’d rather be as this child!
Maybe one in a few million!

“Thousands of candles can be lit from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened. Happiness never decreases by being shared.”

Bringing joy to others might cost us a little time.
Maybe a little effort too!
But its rewards you’d never surpass,with any cash value or any other earthly goods!

No matter how small!
Your intentions will show true!
Make a difference in someone’s life!
Be only your time!
A book read to the aged!
A mere hug to the weary!

Go ahead I dare you!

Give!

Why do I even bother ?
Oh this is not a poem to sway you with romantic words, no infact i probably won’t share this with whom it belongs.
No more an apology, and reallity check for me!
Oh but that be said without malice for you!
Rather all I do is ***** things up!
Even though I’d try my heart to make sure to get it right with every intention to make your day!
I’d get it wrong I don’t even truly know where I went wrong!
But somehow hurt you i did!
Thats more painfully riviting ro my core far more than you pushing me away!
Many words come to mind from pathetic, useless, idiotic. Waste of human space, and many more, sad to describe anyone as this sadder realising this of oneself!
Should have got right the first time and save everyone the waste of time!
Have had to get my head around not doing anything they call stupid for so long, i honestly strugle to find a reason to carry on!  For what? Why?
And mostly cant say it would stupid, no be thei ly thing i can  think would make sense!
To hurt the one i love no matter what i do ill ***** it up!
Hurting you is an unbearable thought!
How could i live with myself?
Cant see how i can get rhrough that
Let alone this pain!
You mean so much to me!
Ive said is take a bullet for you! (Die for you)
But would rather live for you !
Now if you not there?
Cant see much hope at all !
No where! All rhe general reasons everyone would usually morivate you with, would hold so little weight!
This pain be out of this world i try but  cant expain this be of magnitudes earthquakes couldnt measure on the same scale!
And somehow i try find that reason in fear of hurting other loved ones!
Somehow i rather find hope!
Not the hope youd think though!
Oh no this is hope that my loved ones (famil)  will understand this pain and somehow forgive me for my intention be not to hurt  them, but to find ease finnaly!
Comfort knowing id be not the reson orhers will hurt tomorrow!
Yes dark and dismal thoughts!
Or are they?
Are they not in other ways considerate?
Oh oh i lean to think so..

Wow see that bright light
With beauty, So radiant, so true
We all have this ability
Yet so  few really do
Its that beautiful gift
Passing friendly glances
We show lovingly to some
Oh what a beautiful gift

A room full of happy kids could be seen as shimmering stars
Smiles across the floor
If we wore ours as children do
Wouldn’t we shimmer too?

Oh smile what a beautiful gift
Don’t let it go to waste
Just smile and shine from within
©

The smile
A wonderful attribute to our lives
Yet costs us nothing unlike its sister the frown
Just adds misery as it thrives
Feeling up or down
It won't do you any good won't add value!
No the smidgin on your face has no crown
It takes from us it saps us dry
To smile is free!
Yes why?

Cause It'll lift you up!
it'll drown your sorrows and let you be
It affects all around us just the same
Yes contagious it is!
To smile is bliss
Come on smile it's free

Output determines altitude!

As would the gauge of the hole determine how fast the ship would sink!

©

An experience par none
With hunger far more than lust
Insatiably I want to devour
With a drive far more than just passion! For these carnal desires are soul fed!
I pondered if I misbehaved in anyway couldn't keep my hands at bay always yearning to touch!
With a need to see the pleasure overload! and wow even just being normal I can't!
Just one look in those eyes and I have desires in an instant all bottled up at once that I'm sure most only have over a lifetime!
Now to contain my hunger to stop insanity rolling in! (drive me crazy) an understatement I'm certain  Well at least till our next soul feast!©

If this be a poem then strangely how apt that your name rhymes with Rash!
I'd babble on about how you are vile!
But that'd do me nothing constructive  or earn me no dime!
And it'd take more than a while,
Oh to tell them you slime?
Be as silly as this Rhyme!
But I get to remember that Tash!
Or would it be Rash to refer of you as Trash?
I'll do no such thing!
For that be your ways to adopt!
I'll hold my head high!
Knowing I loved my Wife!
And I fought without end for my marriage I did!
You will atone for your actions,
I shall have no joy or knowledge of what punishment he shall for you bid!
But I'll hold my head high for this I won't lie!

The greatest part of me is you!
My daughters
Forever proud of you
Forever yearning for you
Forever praying for your success
No matter how I fair wrong
I long for you to get it rite
You wow me all the time
Proud ye and more!

The greatest love song is I love you daddy.
I can stand testament to it no greater love ever lived than that of a father n child.
Although I only fathom a glimpse of that love our Heavenly Father taught us this in his love for us as a father myself.
I grasp it and realize my role in life to serve as his servant, as a father for his children as I am his child!
Thank you Daddy
Thank you for this renewed strength in faith.
I know forever tested n tried.
I know how you forgive!
For you gave your greatest love to us for this.
Wow how we only almost grasp it's awesomeness an awe we never fully understand!
Thank you father.
A selfless act no mere man could truly perform!
But a father could !
I'd lay my life down tomorrow for any of its earthly values in a heartbeat for my children!
As you have done for us!
And if it's what you need of me I would give my life for you!
But I realize my role in this sordid society is to live for you!

Thank you lord for this strength

I pray may my faith grow as strong as my love as a father, as your child!

Thank you daddy!
The greatest love song ever !

The true measure of success, pure life with family a-glow
Children's laughter and happiness a-flow

Sorely not the house we buy or rent
A humble life, with no anger to vent
Forget that prayer sent for wealth n prosperity yet
A life of true smiles all round, our sans pareil!

Reckless and ruthless
Like a pit filled with vipers
They lash out
At most far more brutal!
These vicious serpents have no match!
For there be no blade as sharp as the toungue!
Slicing our hearts to shreds
Or demoralizing our souls so we could wish against existence!

Astonishingly they be the the kindest at times
Even Producing melodious harmonies
Or swooning our hearts as if sweat nectar to taste

But give them a chance and they will show you severe agony and pain!

Beware of the tongue
For you have one too!
©

I've lived this life with all its ups and downs and looking back, with some real valor!
They look up to me they expect so much I'm their life's Guarantor!

Oh I've often failed
Many a anguished moment, and even wailed!

But I won't give up

In great moments they be Elated and oh so glad
Or others if they sad
I'm there proudly! I'm their Dad!

With smile like no other
A feeling I can only call by its true name!
LOVE
It be Not just a feeling
NO
It be where my heart resides!

For true love have no prescribed measure,
This be of unfathomable depths of,
Joy
Elation
Jubilance no word can describe!
Yes in US, there be no measure!,
But, OH WOW!

For she holds my heart! and I know I have hers!
Love be far more than a feeling!
Love be her smile that can warm any room!
Love be home!
Wherever we might be!
More true to it all!
Love be US !
For more complete I have never been!
Love be more than a feeling ye!
Love be more than an emotion too!
This can’t be what they sing about!
No song has yet done it justice!
No this is far more than that!

So best I got yet!
Love is Us!

A country singer strums his guitar as his lyrics leave me swallowing lumps!

“ Sitting in the dark all night fighting shadows,
And the urge to call you up hits me like an arrow.
It ain't the whiskey talking or the loneliness I'm feeling.
It's the memories, all the little things, that keep me from healing.
I'd give up all the days I got left on this earth,
'Cause without you I don't know what they're worth; no.
I'd give it all for you, if you'd let me.
This heart don't have a home without you in it; no.
I'd stand before you, as a man who's been broken.
Truer words never spoken.”

Yeah as if from my pen and only him singing!
I said it before but I can’t help this feeling!
But love you!
I always will!
Happy not just a state of mind, for it be a place
Oh so much so it’s a place, a time, a destination and a goal
It be where we should reside

When you walk into my home I want you to feel it!
When you look at me my heart will show it! For happy is where my heart resides!

Happy I need for me first!
If those that hearts are set in unhappiness they need know it remains their choice!

My Happiness is mine! no one else can steal it or navigate it!
I am the captain of this ship!

Oh happiness is mine!
I own it’s title deed

As a lush garden I aim to keep it in bloom!
So who ever should visit even a fleeting moment in my life! Should know happiness be mine!
©

So proud to be part of a driving force to help!
We managed to provide for a little soul named Precious, and to that she truly is!
Thank you all for your help! There were rewards there, I can never convey in words!
But you made it possible! And we continue to try! Make their little world a place with hope!
Yes they come from the saddest of places knowing only despair,
But no longer for at this home the children run and laugh at play!
A sound melodious when thinking from whence they come!
Oh thank you, yes oh thank you!

Today I smile, I smile oh yeah!
For happiness be my choice!
Yeah I own that right!
It be ours to have
Oh yeah
Choose to smile!

“Having lost a person so Dear to me recently I found my heart aching so, and so I write this for my friends n others who have this heartache”

Time heals they say, well I’m not sure about that, but it does allow us to cope.

We wake up these dreary mornings with heavy hearts, but somewhere we find the strength that somehow there will be hope.

I know with life’s heavy blows when loosing a loved one, they don’t fade from our memories, we just relish them in a happier place than where sorrow holds.

So, we can wallow in grief, or smile and remember, for tomorrow brings solace!  and we get to smile and think, and raise a glass and remember how great moments were shared.

So for now we can cry we deserve that too, For we loved them so dear, how else can our hearts deal with this ache we bear?

But tomorrow we smile and cherish them again !

How often it’s said “trust is earned”
Oh but it holds far more
For at times it should just be!
For the persons worth!
For how they hold your heart!
For how else did you earn them as part of your life?
Yet through acidic traits and scars of those so traitorous that we allowed in!
There will be doubt in the purest that deservedly own a special place in our hearts!
Yes trust shouldn’t just be earned for those I speak of, it’s in no uncertain terms!
By default deserved!
YET!
Shallowly,
How we allow these scars left by our past experiences by ignoble people, to tarnish what should just be!
So to My so true, without reserve if ever unappreciated in moments of blindness,
You are a True Treasure!
More than thanks be due!
But for the great person you are! you back me anyhow!
Wow a sheer blessing you are!
My love be yours with no refrain!

For Truth i began a fasting

Never have I fasted
But have started my pledge
Maybe a hunger strike without audience!
But if I can’t have this truth revealed I don’t want to be!
For it makes a far greater truth a lie too!
My love for her!
So it’s day two and feel no pangs!
Be it sobs feeding my existence I don’t know!
True I remain!

How we sell ourselves short so often
We tell a fib or a little white lie
To avoid conflict
To save face
For a greater good

What a fallacy
A lie is a lie

How can one ignore the fact
We throw away our integrity
We don't show true to our character

Or is it that you are a liar ?
The deed itself is deceit
Double dealing
Trickery
Fraud
Underhandedness
Treachery

Oh but to say a few
When done to us we are hurt
Why not have that same integrity we wish be dealt our way?

Cause it's easier?
Is it?

If it's easier for you
Then you have no place near me!
I won't say I never lie!
Oh I have yes!

But it's taken it's toll on me!

I know integrity!
I know it's arch enemy too!

A white lie?
Really is that what we tell ourselves?
It's like getting leukemia
To cure  Emphysema!
Ridiculous yeah!

But I'll choose to rather be silent than lie!
I'll be the man I portray!
The man I want to look up to!

I have to try

Or I am just that same as that
diminutive little deed!
A LIE

Be it Weak?
For they see these tears!
Oh witness them yes!
For it’s where you shall see the pain!
Or is there such a thing as pain!
Love!
Good!
Bad!
All just what we allow ourselves to believe in!
Only misery we exist as truly!
The rest all *******!
We like water that evaporates and rains down are no more than a part of a miserable cycle!
We can blindly plod along or see its truth!
And forget all the ******* and allow no crap in!
Weak?
I wonder!  
Maybe tougher than all perceive by rather allowing all the false crap no more!
Weak? Oh no!
Be just your perception!

We live our lives so close to each other, But how often do we take our loved ones for granted, and in the rat race of life just pass each other by!
Unintentionally taking those so dear to our hearts for granted!

Take a minute, hold on to them for you never know when you will get the opportunity again, sadly sometimes if ever!

Live life like it is your first kiss, nothing should hamper you saying how much you care!
It should be free!
For ever there!
I love you!
Should be Something you show!
Not what you just say! You feel it why not show it!
Love is something of the heart that we wouldn't be the same without!
While you have them realize!
You have them!
Cherish them!
Enjoy them!
Show them!
Let nothing set that aside!
For you never know when tomorrow is no more!

Sitting on a deck watching the rain over the river I can’t help and ponder!
After a weeks worth of days mostly filled with rain,
And the pitter patter on the roof hardly even noticeable.
Brings me to think how we always complain it’s too hot or it’s too cold and,and, and!
Instead of embracing what we have we seek the negatives!
Is this how we as humans were made?
Or is it our choice ?
We have to see that for every situation, no matter how grave it may seem or how much we are at a loss, there is always a positive to every negative!
We just need to start embracing the positives!
Life is Good!
Life is as beautiful as you want to see it!
For if I wanted to be short sighted, I would have only seen the rain drops on the water!
Yet there be so much more!
©

We live our lives in trust
Give out our heart to many
To Friends, family, loves colleagues and many others
But truly only few who deserve us
And the many who take for granted and just use us
They lay rot to our hearts
Stealing away our ability to eagerly give lovingly

An innocence in trust fueled and blinded by love for them
A beautiful trait mostly?
Or a weak flawed character?
They tarnish our hearts as if leaving blemishes that slowly turn into stone!

No weak we are not being of pure heart and lovingly give thereof,
It be thier character that’s weak
We need know there demure
So for them we can turn those stone blemished hearts to their court

But need not allow  ourselves to be less for our hearts we can keep pure and true!
We will often run to their aid but call on them and  you will age waiting!
It be only a few who hold out hearts true!
Stand strong and alone you will know who you can rely, when absolutely necessary!

Don’t miss a moment to praise those  
For those truly worth
Love, a true accomplishment worth bragging about,
let them know and sing Their praises!
They be not to be labeled that tarnished name, (friend) no they hold a far greater unsaid name boasting in our hearts, love!
For the handful at most they be
They be of us! and our own!
Happy not just a state of mind, for it be a place
Oh so much so it’s a place, a time, a destination and a goal
It be where we should reside

When you walk into my home I want you to feel it!
When you look at me my heart will show it! For happy is where my heart resides!

Happy I need for me first!
If those that hearts are set in unhappiness they need know it remains their choice!

My Happiness is mine! no one else can steal it or navigate it!
I am the captain of this ship!

Oh happiness is mine!
I own it’s title deed

As a lush garden I aim to keep it in bloom!
So who ever should visit even a fleeting moment in my life! Should know happiness be mine!
©

We live these busy lives filled with stress
Fueled by the lies of what they call success
Be it a Lamborghini or Ferrari or even far less
We pick up on others visions, to which we aim our happiness

But, that be the true key to our success
Yes happiness
Our own true happiness
Only real key to success

Lives not on a key ring for
Or any other thing

How can I say this?
Because I've come to realize it only lies within!
So we lead these lost lifestyles, filled with lavish sin
Only to feed that monsters savage evil grin
Most importantly what I hope to achieve befofre im laid in the soil
If you want true happiness first find it in the one thing money cannot toil,

How I wish I'd seen this right from the start!
Oh yes true happiness, is only in your heart!

Getting there! oh I'll succeed!!

Solemly  all this I swear!
And with all I am! And Never to waiver from!

Oh yes, I claim my love for you to be pure!
For it is from my heart, and no other possibly i’d see fit to, could or id want to compare!

Oh yes I, claim my love for you to be true!
Oh yes true for the very thought of you makes my heart smile, and excited to see you even if its a mere glimpse of my wallpaper on my phone! ”yes your picture, why its on my phone screen and proudly so”
And every visit starts with that exciting heart racing glee! That can't be anything but true! For me, there will never be another!

Yes, I claim my love for you forever learning!
As there is never a moment I will ever pass up again in bettering my self if the opportunity is needed, I will do my all to create such an opportunity!
From the moment intimacy was shared I felt as if I was more, being with you, my heart had no choice! With its what I believed as unscalable walls, oh yes you make me want to be more!

Oh yes,, I claim my love for you to be selflessness and only realize just how so, more and more so, for even in me wallowing in fear and sadness my greatest hurt and total resentment was mine towards myself for unwittingly or not nonetheless hurting you! And as learning brings growth, enabling me to promise to remain true and pure! And there will never be a sacrifice id not give to ensure my love remain just that!

Oh yes, I claim my love to be unique!
For there can be no greater love from a man to a woman than the love I promise you! This I know to be true with all I am! Or I would rather no longer myself exist!

Oh yes, I claim it to exclusive!
For this, I say this with all the conviction of my every breath! But stronger than just my hearts conviction! I say this with conviction of my soul to bear before God! And with his strength in me a strength no other can compare!

Oh yes, I claim my love for you to be legendary!
For Jenni, you deserve no less!
And there will never be a second of any hour, ill strive with all my heart and soul to show you all this!
I love you to no end I promise