You have such a hold on me
That kind of hold that doesn’t fade
No matter how many years
We’ve been apart

If I had to choose someone
I would’ve chosen you
I still might choose you
But I’m confused

And then I think about that hold
And all the memories we’ve shared
And I know no matter how far
Every single second of every single day

I do

I saw you today
I see you all the time
In all the things
You’re in my head before I go to bed
And In the cars and in the trees and in the mountains and in the sky

But i actually saw you today
And you saw me too
And I know this because we locked eyes
We locked eyes for just a second
And in that second I saw all the things that I want and can’t have
Staring into those dark dreamy eyes

The same eyes I’ve cried over every day since the summer ended
The same eyes that held such love in them just a few months ago
But they were just blank

And just like that the second was over and you turned your head and looked away

You saw me
I know you saw me
You had to have seen me
Please see me

And I’m afraid that if you saw everything I’d written
Cause it’s all about you
Every single
Word
Syllable
Letter

You wouldn’t come running back into my open arms
Tears
Running
Down
Your
Face

You would get even more scared
Hiding
Your
Face
Forever

It’s kinda weird to think about
Because sometimes I’m living so far in the past
And it’s almost like you’re mine again

There we are
Back in the gym, where I first met you
And there you are
Looking fine af
And there I am drooling over every single thing you do
Cause your arms and your legs and your shoulders and your chest just have a way of making me weak
Sometimes you talk to me
Sometimes you glance at me
Sometimes you ignore me
But I’m waiting
For you
To see
That I want you so so so badly

Then flash forward a couple months
We go on a golf date
It’s your first golf date
And my first date. Ever.
It’s awkward I try to talk to you and make conversation but your too introverted for me and it’s weird
But you’re just the right amount of introverted too
And I’m sorry
But I’m in love
With you
Sorry
Again

Suddenly we’re there
Late on a Thursday night
Like three in the morning
You pick me up
Because you can drive
And we go to an empty parking lot
Just me and you
And you kiss me
And I remember that kiss for the rest of my life
I remember you for the rest of my life
Because we’re together
And everything’s good
And no one’s hurt
And no one’s sad
And no one’s crying every single night about how much she wishes she could just kiss you again
Or even so much as hold your hand
Or rest her head in the space between your chin and your collarbone

And then suddenly I open my eyes
And ****
Just like magic
You’re gone again

So it was awkward?
So you dipped?

I still think you are the most beautiful person in the world
and it would simply be the bomb
If we could try again.

It’s kinda weird to think about
Because sometimes I’m living so far in the past
And it’s almost like you’re mine again
And then suddenly I open my eyes
And ****
Just like magic
You’re gone again

If you came up to me and said you wanted me back
I would go
In a heartbeat