I put a strong front,
I know I do.
Trust me.
I'm scared.
That with the distance
You have pulled back.
Attempting to break
the bond we have.

I'm Scared,
You got scared too soon
Gave up too easily
When it got hard

I'm scared,
thet when I get to see you
you'll be distant
I'll have to pretend
with my Strong face
Pretend,
That you wouldn't
Have  just killed me.
Tore my heart to pieces,
Crushed my dreams,
Crushed my hopes ,
Ruined a future,
I was hoping to have,
With you.

Because, To me
It's always been you ,
All this time,
All this distance between us,
It's always ,Just been you.

I'm scared
I'm Frightened to the fibre of my bones,
Of seeing you again.
I promise you,
I might not have the strength
to put on my strong face.
I'm scared ,
Everyone will see  me,
Breakdown, Completely Crushed.

I'm fighting to stay a decent girl
And you're just fighting to keep me,
I've torn myself to pieces up and down this house,
Trying to remember who I used to be.
Your holding on so tightly,
To a dream that I once wanted,
A dream that left me long ago,
That now just leaves me haunted.
You and me, in love forever
Surrounded by life so simple,
This dream that I held so dearly
Turned out to be so fickle.
You were reckless with my heart
And that dream quickly shattered,
I think just to keep me sane
I pretended it didn't matter...
That girl who felt deep love is gone
But I want her back so desperately,
Do you think that if I call her
She will come back to help me?
When she left she took that dream
And what was left over of my love,
She left me as an empty shell
Only to remember who I was.
She left us here together
Maybe she thought I would just follow..
Every day I sit here and pray
That she may come back to me tomorrow

Everybody seems to know what they want from me
and yet I don't know what I want for myself
People expect me to be able to deal with anything
They throw their problems upon my shelf.
I'm expected to forgive and let go
Get up and move forward
Endure the worst from others
And always have a helping hand to offer.
I think I just want to be left alone
I have nothing left to give to anyone
No compassion left in this body of mine
I don't want to be asked for a dime or an opinion.

What if I told you the pain was heavier than the pleasure

Would you still find a gem in my soul to treasure?

If I told you I feel darkness within me when I wake

Would you still choose me every day?

If the blood that ran through my veins was cold and could freeze you

Would you still hold me as tight as you do?

If I pushed you away and got lost in time

Would you find me and save me from my own mind?

I read your poems and I feel as if I know you
As if I have known you for your entire life
As if I have witnessed every smile and tear in the night
Every nightmare that causes your fright
I read your poems and I feel as if I know you.  

I read your poems and I feel like you trust me
Like I am your dearest friend and you confide only in me
So close we are, you tell me every thing
I read your poems and I feel like you trust me.

I read your poems in silence and I have forgotten where I am
Line after line I nod my head because I understand
I read about you and where it all began
I put you down and pick you up to read in silence and am lost once again.

Tears are worthless
What will they get me?
I'll still feel the pain
I'll still remain empty.
I'll still wake up in this place
I'll still have these memories
So just tell me please,
Where will crying get me?

I'll still be the same person
That you always have seen
It will have no life changing effect
On the person that I will be.
The process of crying
Won't make me happy
And the sorrow will return
It always does eventually.

So it seems as though
Your release is a useless hobby
That isn't very helpful
In maintaining reality.
So if you know the answer
Then you can resolve my questioning
Tears are worthless
What will crying gain me?

So much hurt, so much pain
You'd never know it by just a glance
You'd never feel her timid fear of you
While you shake her hand.

You'd never know she was touched and abused
By the smile she gives you
And you'd never think twice about her innocence
Because of the way she moves you.

You'd never know of her fear of men
Because she seems so bold
But appearances can be misleading and
Her eyes do not tell the story of her soul.

Alone deep inside
She sits by the river and she wonders
Where her heart and soul have ran off to
And why they left without her.