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Everyday i died.
Everyday i doubted
Everyday i felt insane
Everyday i lived in fear
Everyday i hated myself
Everyday i didnt eat... sometimes.
Everyday i bent to your will
Everyday i suffered in silence
Everyday i hated you
Everyday i couldnt take it
Everyday i thought of running
Everyday i dreamed of what it could be like
Everyday i lost my trust in everyone
Everyday no one could understand
Everyday i lost myself
Everyday i crumbled
Everyday i felt ashamed
Everyday i couldnt recognize myself anymore

BUT NOW...

Everyday i get a little stronger,
Everyday i get a little braver,
Everyday i hurt a little less,
Everyday i feel a bit more free,
Everyday i trust a bit more,
Everyday i feel a little wiser,
Everyday you control me less and less,
Everyday im a little happier,
Everyday i find myself
Everyday i feel proud
Everyday i follow my heart
Everyday i find a bit more of myself
Everyday i put back pieces you stole
Everyday i heal...
Everyday i grow...
Everyday i am reborn...
Everyday i am more me than i was before
Everyday i am thankful for what ive survived
Everyday i am alive...
Everyday i am living in spite of you.
when did your eyes turn from blue to grey?
what a beautiful grey
a cold grey
a wet October grey
an "I forgot my umbrella" grey
a "Should we stay home?" grey
a day consumed with nostalgic sadness grey
a familiar reminder of rejection grey
a hopeless new romance grey

as grey as the ash from your cigarettes
as grey as that woolen hat that I'd wear while I waited wondering when you'd wander home
as grey as my best shirt you stripped off of me on a grey night

i fell in love with a mixture of black, blue, and muddy pearl
it sparkled against me when the sky clouded up
and we kissed until our vision blurred

I don't remember how vivid colors were before you.
 Sep 2017 trashcanpoetry
Maggie
trip
 Sep 2017 trashcanpoetry
Maggie
Stretched out like starfish in oceans of meadows
with fractal goggles for eyes
we followed the footsteps of the breeze in the grass
below bismuth bugs in nacre skies

our minds began bobbing between
the confetti of chattering crowds
sheltered by the shade of the breathing pea green trees
and cyan sky spilling marshmallow clouds

slips of thought escape our lips
but trapped are we in a body
as mouth, nose, ears, eyes and fingertips
make their best guess at reality

perhaps there are more truths than sides in a circle
an infinite edge
for what is true if i can only sense?
is the tangerine sun really red
or simply a translation of a wavelength?
does hot and cold exist?
is a dish really sweet or sour?
soft because our fingers can’t feel the bumps?
or odourless because we’re ill and dour?

We fall into ourselves but stop and smile
because life is a surreal serendipitous surprise
so we bathe in the floating music
behind closed kaleidoscopic eyes
 Sep 2017 trashcanpoetry
Seema
I am a fool, who fell for love
A wingless angel, from the heaven above
Waited and waiting for the promise virtues
Sitting with the deads among momentary statues
Alone, thinking of the fortress I left behind
For the sake of love and mankind
But no one notices me and neither my deeds
Everyone is so busy with their wants and needs
I pray to thee, to grant my wings back
So I can fly to my realm and be with my pack
Angels have become a myth over here
People laugh at me, when they often hear
Say, am a fool, a mental ******
So shameful of how we are been regard
Beautiful creation is this earth, Dear Lord
But fading away is your righteous teachings and word
I have seen the demons in disguise
Playing like a ******* dude, pretending to be wise
The hell gates are lose, leaking out the evilness
The untamed beasts, walk out with their wickedness
I have no place of peace but this burial grounds
Where I seek your help Lord, as the darkness surrounds
I am powerless, as my time on earth is finishing
Seen how innocents survive the wrath through punishing
Tonight, I shall have my wings back to flee
Else I'll be dead before I can make another plea...

©sim
Fictional write.
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