I cannot live this way
It’s no longer my body that aches for others
It’s my heart

I cannot love this way
I take the opportunity away from myself
A sabotage I can’t control
My own worst enemy
But this hate must belong to others

I cannot be this way

I feel that I would be the bride of adventure
That is my destiny
This feeling of being unwanted
Left behind
Abandoned
I feel that I would be the bride of adventure
That is my calling

This future that lies ahead
Empty or filled?
Bright or dull?
I feel that I would be the bride of adventure

Death was once my
Greatest fear,
Though life was filled
With sorrow –

Attended with
So many
Ills, and darker
Still tomorrow...

I knew if I
Were to Escape,
My soul,
I couldn’t save!

Because this ill
Within would sink
Me lower than
The Grave

.