I long to meet a Guinevere
So many poems I'd pen
Like Guinevere by the Azure Mere
Or simply, My Sweet Gwen

I taste the sound of Guinevere
Tis salt upon my lips
Perhaps she'd be my Gwenhwyfar
Sweet wine of Arthur's sips

Smooth and fair my Guinevere
Of her so many songs be sung
I'd love you o'er and o'er, my dear
Tomorrow I'd have ye hung.

r ~ 4/22/14

You are the person who held me through the worst moments of my life.
You are the person who refuses to talk to me days after.
Such power
Such cowardice
And you wonder why I am afraid of you.

we wound in stars on old fishing rods;
reeling on promises from days where
the light still brought species, clutter,
schematic belief. you caught three. i
caught nothing, but glimmers of hope.

allusions and reality are often cleft,
though. this truth i'd rather cast,
like myself, over cliff-face. but, i
alone am
mutable in this scheme. you named
yours as blank-faced children, born
to the sea.
predictably, i named mine woe.

fate moves through seasons, sovereign
groups, ways set down to dot. the
object stands;
here lies truth. this is the truth:
pebbles form kiltered circles
under the dock. floating
above the architecture of my
ribs consuming churned
air, i watch me fade. i
discern and too, dilapidate.

you raised yours with colour
in iris. i picked mine up
lovingly-
this woe is
awake and tightly circling.

You know, you take all I’ve got.
I don’t want to stop.
It’s takes far too long.
And we, can never get away.
I’m trying every day.
To be the one you want.
So go, take it all away.
I’m dying now today,
And we can’t even leave, tonight.
Today, you seem so far away.
It comes in many waves,
The biggest ones we’ve got.
We can't be what we're not.
Believe, we can move ahead.
I don't know what I said,
To make you run away.

But, I won’t see you any more.
I’m headed for that door.
So please don’t talk to me.
For now, I’ve taken off with her.
It’s something we've deferred,
Again without a friend.
And don’t look out for me,
‘Cause you'll see I’m doing fine,
and you’re way out of line,
for forgetting that I’m here.
I see, you’re falling over there,
There’s something in your hair,
but you can’t brush it out from here,
oh no! Oh no!

Get away.

I hate the way you breathe.
I hate the way you see,
Me in this state of mine.
State of mind,
Out of time.
I see you passing out behind
The concert ticket line.
I know it’s up to me.

But I get so excited when you’re near.
And it's not exactly clear
What I’m even trying to say.
So I'll get away,
I’m leaving here today.
I’ll go be on my way.
Nothing more to say.
Don’t get in the way.
I’m not here to play.

It’s good enough to fail.
Insist on being my best friend,
When it all comes to an end.
I won’t know where I stand.

The saddest part
is on the last days, when
you realize that your words
don’t come as easily, don’t flow
from you like pain, as
they did earlier. When you realize
you’ve seen so much
you’ve used up your quota
of surprise.

You told me I was a pan of hot water and
sometimes it hurt to touch me
but you never thought to turn the temperature down

you just left me boiling

its april 7th and you are still a joke
but somehow you are the only one laughing anymore

I once told you I saw fire in your eyes
and you said it was just the reflection of the
ever burning in mine

I've only now realized that was nothing but a lie

The devil is not red or pointed with hooves
The devil is of flesh
He arrives as the very thing you want most

His name is Lucifer
And he is tall and handsome

He keeps you blind to the raging hellfire
He does not mention you are floating on the river Styx

When he finally pulls the curtain and
gives you back your corneas and irises
You are like Persephone-

you've already eaten seven pomegranate seeds

I self identify as the mud caked on your shoes
after you stepped in an unavoidable puddle

I self identify as the coffee that burns the back of your throat
every morning around 5 am

which was always right before you went to sleep
and it never failed to make me laugh

I self identify as everything that reminds me of you

I am a museum to your thoughts
your dreams keep me up at night
I can tell when you are cold when you are 37 miles away

I know you just lit your sixth cigarette of the day
I'm sorry you led me astray

What happens if you love so much
you give them everything

right down to the skin off of your back and
your organs and bones

If you ever leave me the plan will be to
drink until the pain is over

But I'm not sure even a never ending hangover
can rid my thoughts of you

Already I feel pieces and memories of you
becoming imprinted into my brain like Braille

I think I would be scared if it didn't feel like
the world is right when I am with you

I once sat on a blood stained pedestal
praying to a god made out of porcelain and water

I once saw through my enemies and
crushed their spirits under my black combat boots

I lie in the face of police
I lie in the face of my mother

I wear these scars like a noose

I copy ****** expressions I see in the movies

I fancy myself a very good liar but who isn’t these days

you make promises from the bottom of your heart
but it makes me wonder just how deep that is

I try to dig
but all I hear is the echoing of sweet words off this tunnel

You tell me to cut people out of my life and I do
I peel them off like a second skin and leave them bruised

I tell you please don't talk to her
On paper it appears you don't
But you jump to defense every time I quietly say her name

I saw you liked her pictures on my news feed
Even though you unfriended her a week ago

You say you let her go

It appears you are letting her in