I twist the black smoky quartz crystal between my fingers,

Staring into the void of the darkness in it's shimmer,

Remembering how the stars predicted

That I would be, and am destructive.

I used to be the angelic who thought they could do no wrong.

Never fathoming dancing with the Devil.

Oh but not I, no longer.

Satan himself sees me at the ball and bows.

He knows to kiss my rings

Cause what a privilege it'd be to waltz with me.

Lilith my Mother, the one who will never bow.

I glide my tongue across my canine's

Only imagining the fangs of a lion.

I am a fallen angel, who painted her wings black.

I stare with blank deranged eyes, knowing I could disconnect

From whatever little soul I have left at a moment's notice

If it means ripping out throats to get what I want.

There is a fire roaring in my charcoal heart

And all I want is pure power.

More power, ferocious all consuming power.

But nay, not over the everyday people,

Only those who dare cut their eyes at me the wrong way,

the ones who question what I am capable of,

The ones who try to steal freedom,

and most importantly,

The ultimate power over myself completely.  

I stare at the crystal and throw my head back in a deep maniacal laugh, reverberating through my throat.

They have no idea who I am to become,

and really neither do I but one thing I do know is,

No one will be able to match my fire.

There is beauty
in these depths.

But you’d have
to drown
to see it.

I no longer suffer,
because i give all of my suffering to the void
and as my past has transformed me tougher
I silence the games that made me felt toyed

and now that I know no suffering
I get to finally claim my peace
in a place where beauty is always singing
and where the pain has finally ceased

no, i did not have to rest eternally
I get to wear the crown of life
because i choose to use mine to see
upon the sea that knows no strife

so i no longer have to suffer
because death no longer knows my name
and as i finally remove the covers
i spread my wings to fly with life's reign

I will spread dirt into every crevice of my broken heart and plant flowers so big and beautiful, that their roots will mend all the shattered pieces back together, and you’ll never be able to see the mess I used to be.