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misha 1d
i was born underground,
i was born with darkness all around
i was born with a voice
my own choice
but they never told me how to use it
so i was quiet.
so quiet,
listening for
the scraping of claws
and eating what they offered me
one day i felt
the sun on my face
and it was august,
the sky lit up like honey
and goldenrods swayed in the wind
and peaches ripened like blood on trees
and i had wings,
i had wings!
so i took to the sky
brushed the dirt from my eyes
and ran away from that accursed
and my mood
rose up like campfire smoke to the heavens
oh what a heaven
there are more of us
and we're in love
so we sing and dance
and take our chances
zipping through the sky
on diaphanous wings
now i sing
and i sing
and i know
some people find it annoying but
i was silent and scared for so long
now im in love and
i know death rides for me
but im in love
there's no room for thoughts of tragedy
as long as you hold me and ravage me
all throughout this night
reverberating with the ecstasy
of all the earth's creatures crying out
misha Jun 25
it took me all these years to realize
you are no god;
when i fight back you bleed red
when you told me you'd bleed ichor instead
misha Jun 12
thunderstorms in june
he threads daisies
through her wet hair
he wraps bindweed
around her bruised neck

two young lovers,
hiding from the world
in a glistening meadow,
muddy bodies tangled
on a muddy blanket

her, a siren of the suburbs
with berry stained lips
lays with her apollo
with eyes of august honey
and a rifle instead of a bow

pulling bugs out of each others hair
wondering if life will always be like this
or if it will change
and how these memories
will feel in the distant future

as the chorus of crickets begins again
after the storm has cleared
the sun descends like a halo
we can't be late
it's time to go
misha May 28
her combat boots
hit the snow
jumping from
her window

stuffed her backpack
full of sweets
her favourite treat

bunny pajamas
and braided hair
she shivers but
she doesn't care

into the night
she wanders away
looking for somewhere
safe to stay

you can't live
on dreams alone
you need
to return home

"but they'll hurt me!"
she begs and pleads
she cries and gets
down on her knees

she looks so pretty
with her doe eyes
but nobody cares
what a surprise

"i don't think i'll go,
i'd rather die",
she turns away
and waves goodbye

another tween
another angel
chose to fly
misha May 28
i've got
intrusive thoughts
classic psych ward
grippy socks

put me
down to dream
floating on
the quetiapine

angel wings
paper white
too close to the sun
they'll catch alight

too close to the dark
they'll drag me down
like the time
i tried to drown

because either i'm
feeling high
or else
i want to die

that's why i'm here
in the locked room
pacing up
and down the gloom

the warden says
its time for bed
trust me it will be
good for your head

i close my eyes
and dream of you
all the struggles
we've been through

yes i know
i'm insane
but i have you
to share my pain
misha May 23
from the cradle
to the grave
i was born
to be your slave

even though
i run away
i'll never forget
the things you say

even when
you drop dead
your voice will be
inside my head

just like a leash
around my neck
i am still
a nervous wreck

when you don't tell me
what to do
i still look up
searching for you

even when
you go to hell
heralded by
the church bell

your prints will be
all over my soul
the way abuse
takes its toll
i hate that i can never know who i would be if i wasn't abused at a young age. there was no me before the trauma. the trauma has become my personality and i will never be free of it.
misha May 11
staggering home after dark
pine needles in my hair
i've become a catholic mother's
worst nightmare

bruises and cuts
my dress in a tangle
crawling through
a raspberry bramble

ruined makeup
smudged with spit
he called me angel
but that isn't it

lost my cross necklace
somewhere in the dark
the one from my grandma
that shimmers and sparks

i'll do anything
because i'm in love
and that matters more
than the heavens above
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