all my life
i've been met by pain
and loss
loss of
family members
because they believed my lying father
loss of
a family friend
because he could no longer endure life
loss of
elderly rolemodels
because a sickness took them away
loss of
best friends
because i became too much of a wreck
and somehow
in the meantime
i lost myself

I guess I’ll never understand
      Why you cry yourself to sleep

Why you look in the mirror
      To see one missing piece

What must I do to help you
      Sleep sound
            When I’m not around...

You are complex, hard to read

But,

You are

perfect

to me.

i felt so empty inside
that i would rather feel like dying
than feel like nothing
so when my old friend came back
i greeted him with open arms
and it was comfortable
for a little while
but then it became unbearable
and i wanted him to leave
but i couldn't make him
and when he finally did leave

i felt so empty inside
that i would rather feel like dying
than feel like nothing
so when my old friend came back
i greeted him with open arms
and it was comfortable
for a little while
but then it became unbearable
and i wanted him to leave
but i couldn't make him
and when he finally did leave

i'm in a room
not too hot
nor too cold
just quite perfect for
me

i stay in the room
and the days go by
now the mirrors come
one mirror
two mirrors
three mirrors

the room is filled with mirrors
i try to look away
but my naked self is starring
i don't fit in here
i run
and now it starts all over

i love darkness

you can't see me;
or
i can't see myself

in darkness i am finally
okay

i could make lines somewhere else

but i'm too persistent

and a little too proud

so i'll just type a little harder

i smile

i laugh

i cry

i'm no longer laughing
and the corners of my mouth have changed direction

why won't you stop?