Lock her up! Lock her up! Lock her up!
Your campaign crowds so chanted.
You took it in and smugly smiled
while they all railed and ranted.

But lock her up for what? I thought.
She's been investigated.
For alleged conflict of interest,
she has been exculpated.

So if such accusations,
when even proved untrue,
provide sufficient grounds for jail.
They'll have to lock up... You!

Your trumpists whoop and shout "hooray"
You talked a lot but talk is cheap
It's your inauguration day
and now you've promises to keep

You must ***** that border wall
or did you change that to a fence?
So wide, so deep and very tall
or were your promises nonsense?

And as for Clinton - Lock her up?
Or did you change your mind?
"Conflicting interests" you once said.
Such crimes in you they'd never find!

Will you deport each and every
undocumented immigrant?
When did you start backpedalling
from that initial angry rant?

And then there are the Muslim folk,
such a convenient bogeyman.
Will they all have to register
while you drop bombs on their homeland?

You said outsourcing steals jobs.
Let tariffs ease that trouble.
But how'll you soothe the working poor
when Walmart's prices double?

But know this, Donald, you have friends
to help with troubleshootin'.
Will you get cosy in that bed
with your dear comrade Putin?

The swamp you promised you would drain,
did it improve or worsen?
How will your bootlick billionaires
assist the average person?

And may we see at long, long last,
your tax returns today?
The ones you promised to release
but changed your mind along the way.

How will you handle, Mr. Trump,
these questions you must face?
The pressure's on you starting now
Lets hope you don't fall in disgrace.

So many promises you made
up to Inauguration day
But please don't keep them - they're so wrong
and such a price we all would pay.

Oh Kellyanne Conway, when she interacts
with the press, she presents the alternative facts.
The alternative facts, the alternative facts,
Oh my! How I love the alternative facts!

The moon is a cube and it's made out of wood.
The ocean's on fire, and broccoli tastes good.
The inaugural crowd was 12 million strong,
and liberty, life and equality's wrong.

The penguins are all busy making Swiss cheese
and poverty's ended whenever you sneeze.
The Donald shall reign o'er the world without end
and Vladimir Putin is our greatest friend.

Cyanide is nutritious and ice cream is hot.
The *** may be black but the kettle is not.
When night falls the sun gets sealed in a can,
and Trump is a kind, loving, wonderful man.

The alternative facts, the alternative facts,
dear God how I love the alternative facts.
To let tyranny rise through unspeakable acts,
let us live to embrace the alternative facts.