longing is what best describes it. what i’m feeling
and what i’m thinking when i see you in passing.
i still regret being with you, but nothing can be done
about things that already happened.
we were full of mistakes, like you said.
none of my friends liked you. and even then, i knew
that something was wrong, and i blame it on my youth.
because there was nothing else to blame
and it was all wrong, we both realized that.
i don’t want to be with you. but your promises linger
and drift into my empty head at night.
when the sky is dark and the air is full of pollen,
when the world is quiet and the metro rumbles
down its track, into a tunnel, open like an animal’s maw.
this is one of the first poems i've written in a while