You took away my life
When you said that I should die
There's no reason I shouldn't cut you off
When you still believe in lies

To think I'd ever hurt you
Just confirms you're out of line
I know I'm not the best
When it comes to making time

But
You know I would have died for you
If you let me even try

I would have put away desires
If it meant you were alright
I would have gathered everything
Just to throw it into fire

I would have killed myself for you
If it meant that you could fly
I would have only prayed to God
If He could just give me a sign

I would have brought you all the roses
From the shop just down the street
I would have purchased every one
If it meant that you were free

I would have taken you somewhere safe
Just to show I have respect
I'm not like the other guys
I'm just looking for a friend

A soul I'll learn to cherish
When the skies are turning gray
A voice that puts to rest
The insecurities that I face

A place my thoughts can sleep
When they're keeping me awake
Your hands that I can hold
When I'm running out of strength

Ocean eyes that I'll admire
When the clouds are making haste
A nose that I'll make fun of
When you don't always get your way

Or your arms that will embrace me
When I've fallen in too deep
The words you whisper quietly
To make my inner demons weep

They will tremble out of fear
Cause they can't haunt me anymore
I know my worth when I'm with you
While we're sitting on the shore

Your mind is an ocean of ideas
That I'm diving to explore
My demons no longer there
When I'm lying on the seabed floor
Surrounded by your loving nature
As I get to know you more

You are everything to me
Which I know I've said before
But only when I'm in your arms
Are my inner demons ignored

I'm embraced by surrounding waters
Like I've finally found a home
Where I'm at my deepest point
But I no longer feel alone

I'll be hitting my rock bottom
But can make it out alive
Your words are enough to hold on to
When I'm on the verge of dying

They may take away my possessions
They may take away my pride
But I'll never let them take you
Even if it means I die

I'm still ripping out my eye lashes
It makes me sad.
I lay and wonder about the woes I cast
and why I feel so bad.

Reflection is a tricky thing.
It can bring up so much, but is never-ending
Like the hyphen between never and ending
Reflection is a process that loops.

You can feel as if you're on top of the world
Once you've climbed out of a pit after reflecting...
only to fall into a ravine after taking a few steps outside instead of running.

The journey to healthy is a tough one.
I feel like I'm splashing in this gorge
Flapping and flailing around,
trying to escape and get warm

Overtime, I slow down more and more
until finally, I want to give up
Succumb to the bubbles...
and perhaps, never wash up.

Why?.
A question so repetitive,
It stifles my mind.

As the more I think,
The less I hide.

The more I speak,
The less I lie.

The more I feel,
The less I disguise.

For the more I live,

The less I am alive.

TW: MENTIONS OF SELF-HARM

My body,
My punishment.
This world is cruel,
And I,
The puppet.

A stabbing sadness,
Shrivels my heart.
Pain,
Becomes painless,
As skin,
Becomes art.

Woes to wounds,
The sheets I have bled.
As a desire,
So deadly,

Leads me to temptation,
Again.

Take a walk
Inside my head,
I’ll give you the grand tour!
Ignore the darkness
Skulking there
Behind those closed doors.
Don’t worry,
You’ll be safe and sound
My thoughts are quieter now.
They speed right past—
Now watch your step!
Once lost, you can’t be found.

Oh little one,
Your heart died so young.
Life can be a pain,
And you were stung.
You sought happiness,
In the arms of your own.
As joy did not exist
In the heart of your home.
Your carers,
Were made of stone.
Flashes of anger
Turned you cold.
But through this,
You continued to grow.
Be proud,
Little angel,
You have won this alone.