It all started
As a mere curiosity
But like a snowball
Rolling down a hill......

I ask my parents
Why do you have me
They speak of family legacy
And 'normal' social expectations;
Yet I have nothing worthy to pass down.
So I shall end the bloodline.

I ask the society
Why do you want me?
They speak of cultural survival
And the gods' commandments;
Yet all I see are oppressive traditions.
So I refuse this ancestral peer pressure.

I ask the church
Why do you want me?
They speak of ensuring numbers
And the "natural" way of the world
Yet all I see are hypocrisy and closed minds.
So I slain the gods in my heart and mind

I ask the world
What do you want from me?
It did not answer; it merely shows.
And I see cruelty, I see pain, I see apathy
So I decide, the universe never cared
There is no meaning to it all
Just the fate one creates for oneself
Thus, I vow, I shall end this darkness
And annihilate all of reality
Should gods and demons oppose me
I will cut them down too!

Strewn into the world, plucked from the veil
An existence unconsented
A consciousness awoken, now pain can be hailed
A life that has unrelented
I irrevocable, cannot be undone
Suicide not a solvent, I will always have existed
From myself nowhere to run
Pain is all, lacking pleasure, happiness resisted
If prevention of pain is your sole desire,
On my philosophy you should inquire

open home
gutter bird
head apart, apart apart

all toil, toil
sheets and time

why’d you bring me here?