January again
And I'm already counting down the days til the next one
Already made enough mistakes in a matter of days
Febuary I'm so done with the rain and the  pattering on the window pain
It's march again
Another year older but I feel more or less the same and not much wiser
Continuing counting down the days
Maybe I'll learn a lesson or two along the way
And learn to line what I think and what I say
April,May
There's nothing much to say just a reminder of the wasted days and praying next year won't turn out the same
June, July
Summer time
I'll just watch and wait inside
November  in sight
Just more sitting and waiting inside
I missed my bus but you know how I get when I write loose all concept of time
December is here met by a cheer
This year it might turn out alright

I'll hold your hand down the rabbit hole
I'm considerate like that
Or maybe just crazy
My fragile minds nieve
To the devil behind my own eyes
I'll forever hold onto last autumn and all the things we shared in common
I'm everything your parents warned you about
From the sins under my soles to the air in my head
Take me back
Take me back to wonderland

Your own son said you're as good as dead
But you're not
You're the strongest person I've ever known
No matter the weather rain or snow
You always brought the bread home
Remember you're my idol the reason I kept fighting
I know you're forgetting things lately
Like names,numbers and even your payments
But I'll never forget you're the strongest person I've ever known
The ghost stories you told me and my sister
Have nothing on the horrors you faced
The ****** in the story couldn't compete with you
You fought a good fight
Won a war
Wear pink with pride
But it all changed when he died
You gave up your home
Because they said you couldn't manage alone  
But you're still, I hope you know
The strongest person I'll ever know

I'm tall enough now for my head to meet head to head with the shower
I'm only hundred and ten pounds and the tale of the tapes against me
I know you haven't noticed
But my feet hang out the bunk beds at your house
Seasons have come and gone since I stayed the weekend
but I've pushed through the weeks learned to use this swing without you
I believe in photosynthesis, self growth and the strength to overcome myself
I'm not rooted down
The ground around me is mine to take
I know it's hard from a neutral point of view
But I don't struggle
To see the ground  I've made up
Small steps mean everything
When the stickers behind your door are stuck with blu-tac in fear you'll fail to stick
It's good to know the only thing that haunts me in the night is a poster falling.

Passing time with talks of red wine
But I don't even drink!
You won't even take this as a metaphor
Guess that's just another reason why
Your words find a home in my mind
Labels, types, grapes and vines
Time fly's in your presence like a child in awe of a war time story
It's not like I care about a single word but I'm a connoisseur I hang on every verse you've ever spoken
I love the gestures you make
Your hands dance you stumble your words you go red faced
I'm sick of writing songs about the downsides
Writing songs about sad boys with broken hearts
Red wines good for that it can ease the pain, cover all the *** holes in your vains
But I don't even drink
I don't think the wines to blame
One day you'll catch me smiling and you'll wonder why I'll have the littlest details on my mind of time forgotten but I won't mind and the talks of labels, types, Grape's and vines

Trying to find the right passage in every verse that leads to the better ending
The one where all the characters survive with peace of mind, no consultation
I can't keep consantration
I need to keep this pace
No hesitation
Keep turning the page no matter what bookmarks get in the way
I'm a none believer in the yelnats curse
I need to keep this pace
Every unpronounceable word like a three legged race
My body is screaming determination while my mind is saying just give up
Sometimes the screams black out the counterparts but sometimes it's just not enough
I'll make it through these mind fields
Take a chance on these steady hands
Keep turning the page no matter what book marks get in the way
I find no refuge in the blurb on the back
I feel the nostalgia of being at school and not haveing the best grasp on life to tell the truth
I know it sounds strange but I'm getting the hang of turning the page

I might be in your bad books
But least you've written me down
I know we've got history
In a black book
A front bottoms ticket and relics of unconditional trust
The sort of thing that could break a man
with the code words it's not long now, it's not long I'll see you around
Eight hour round trips worth every mile
Do you remember how we fashioned junk food and late night TV as our new found routine
And I know this Saga is far from over plot twists no blank pages
We won't follow the lines
Stumble into the margin
Avoiding holes pre punched for us
Doodle my my name on almost anything
Least you've written me down.

Drive south into the sunset
Roll down your window let me kiss you away
A repeat of the same old story
That I'm still trying to get my head around
You always said the sun will rise again over a mountain with a far too familiar name
I always said I wish these days would never end
That's just another night without you
Tell me what it's like up there
Because I swear it's hard to reach the summit of these walls
Oxygen is getting scarce and the winds of change are picking up
It's not the first time I've been blown away  
We'll watch the sunset sleep together

I wish I could meet him
Have a heart to heart
Ask a few questions and talk it out
I'll be the interviewer
You be Theresa May lie about strong and stable til you're blue in the face
"Why me?" I ask
You slip on your words and I swear I hear you say
"You've got to understand i only plague the mind of the strong and we need to learn to get along"
I sit up at the edge of my bed questioning why I'm talking to myself  
I'm not that gone yet.
I'll find the common strength to overcome myself .

If you ever have the audacity to feel worthless
I know things didn't quite work for us
But remember the purpose that I wrote this
To remind you that you're beautiful
And I know there's not much to my life right now
Other than living in clouds and looking down
Trying to bargain your value while I don't even know my own
Why should you take the time to read a single line?
A poem I wrote in just fragments of my spare time
Because every second is priceless
But it'll always be worthwhile to try make you smile
And Every second I took to write this I was thinking of you