you weren't there for me then

and i got by

so what makes you think

i need you now

How much longing must be in my heart
To sleep with a blanket in my arms
To cheaply mimic
The warmth I don’t feel

tw self harm



Perhaps I’m starting to understand
Tonight, I want desperately
To take the blade to my skin
But only to leave a mark
A reminder
Of what’s happened today

I’m not going to survive alone
I can go through the motions
I can push through the days
But in the quiet privacy of solitude
I’m faced with everything I hate
Staring back through the mirror
Looking into my cold, steel eyes
Everything I hate
Everything that makes me want to implode
I want to disappear

I think I’d very much like
To twist myself into a ball
To fold in on myself
And vanish from existence

Life burns
We die
Our wick may be castrated
Or stretched to an ungodly length
Regardless
Life burns

I want to die
I'm afraid to experience
'No life'
Many are waiting
I have many to greet
But
Life goes on
Death goes on
Purgatory is greener than both
But
The taste of stale fire
The last taste being rust
Regrets look on me as I spiral