my mom is yelling about something so miniscule it shouldn't be an issue and how dare i speak up but i'm getting fed up but she's on this constant emotional rollercoaster you never know when she will crash or how the alcohol will react

my dad is getting frustrated with the nonsense and stress is consuming him every day threatening his health but he can't confide in his wife so he goes to his daughter instead

my sister is getting **** at school from kids who are insecure with themselves so they feel they need to take it out on soft souls like herself and there's nothing i can seem to do

my boy is not my boy anymore and he used to be one of my best friends but now i can barely look him in the eye without beginning to cry and right now i wish he were hugging me rather than ******* up my head

my friends are unreachable at the times i need to talk since there's no way to contact them when the night marches on so i sit alone and try to figure this out myself, i'd hate to bother them anyways

my head is ******* spinning and i feel dizzy and sick like i'm going insane but i'm not sure if i want to scream and hit the walls or lay still in bed unable to move at all

my life feels messy and i don't know what to fix first, it should probably be myself but i just can't be a priority

s.s

i believe
i wasn't ready to let go
because i felt oddly close to him
i felt a comfort i hadn't experienced before
like being with him was safer than being with myself
and a connection like that
doesn't come along every day

s.s

if he called me up
at three in the morning
or came tapping at my walls
calling my name
i would lose
my few hours of sleep
just to hear his voice
and anything he had to say

s.s

how do you let go
of someone you've fallen for
when you don't want to

s.s

she wants to talk with
him more than anything but
sorrow consumes her

i am not okay
it is that simple

i left three of my classes today just to go breathe in the bathroom so my peers wouldn't see the tears forming in my eyes and i could stick to the lie that i'm doing fine without you

my day was **** because i saw you and you seem better than you've been in a long time and the fact you're so happy kills me to the point where i dont want to even look at you, but at the same time i'm glad you're doing well because i feel like hell and you dont deserve that

i kept thinking of you on the ride home and couldn't stop crying because your laugh just replayed in my head and the boy next to me wouldn't stop asking what was wrong but i told him nothing and his comforting pat on the shoulder just made me flinch  

i say i'm doing okay but my close friends see right through it so they hug my shaking shoulders and hold my trembling hands because they know how much i cared about you and how much this has hurt me

i dont want to go to school because i am afraid to see you because it ******* hurts not being able to hug you, feel your lips against mine, or even just talk about the **** going on in our lives

i wouldn't erase our memories from my head but if there was a pill that could fast forward time to the point where i am over you and the thought of you doesn't make me feel ******* miserable i would have swallowed five by now

i am not okay
it is just that simple

s.s

he lingered
like her bruises
serving a constant reminder
of the pain inflicted

s.s