We sit in a row of four
I'm on the edge
On the outskirts
Why don't they talk to me
Until they need something
I thought we were all friends
Maybe I'm just the worthless one...

Since the moment we met
I began to dig
The grave for our love

And it got deeper
With each day
I witheld the truth

Only because I know
That you'd prefer
Someone better

Just hours ago I was thinking about how long it's been since I've written
And it's because only write on 3 occasions
When I'm sad
When I'm mad
And when I'm in love
Here I am praising my feelings for staying in control, leaving as quickly as they came
Here I go thinking you're just another boy passing by
Yet here I am
Just a little past 2am writing again
Here you go inspiring yet another piece of mine
While I hope the topic stays on love longer than before
Although I know it won't

Here I am
Music loud
Glasses on
Mind racing
Racing to find the sign

I found and followed when we began
Ignored when we came to an end
And now
I'm looking to see if we should be a we
Or stay you and me

I found my sign when I opened this page
And turned up my tunes
Caroline Smith sang
"You got to move on"
"You go to let him go"

I won't ignore them again
Be destroyed by them again
My sign searching has come to an end

The surface of the water
Is first to be seen
But the real beauty lies
Beneath the sea

“What do you want to be?”

A questioned asked

When we’re too young 

To fathom the importance 

What happens when what I want

Isn’t what I become?

What happens if

I’m not sure?

What really happens 

**If I fail?

The moment I think

Someone is there to listen
I am forgotten

I'm okay
I'm okay now
but I might fall again

back to my old ways
not talking to anyone but my lonely thoughts
becoming too familiar with the tears on my pillow
recalling all my failed loves

But for now
I'm okay
but just know I might fall again
and fall soon

I wanted a closeness you couldn't give
And blamed myself for what I didn't receive
Here's a good lesson on needs
They must be met for a relationship to move
Is that why we got stuck? Mixed up? And in the wrong direction

I felt the distance growing
Forced a whisper of "goodbye"
And left the door cracked wondering if
We could give it our all and try

I was not prepared to let you go
I thought it would be easy but baby
I don't know
If I was smart
Or a fool for not listening to my heart

I couldn't be in a more complicated situation
Me expecting to date this guy when I ****** his ex best friend
You expecting me to date your current best friend
Me being beaten and broken
You fixing my pieces
Me continuing to fall for you
You falling for my friends
When it comes to me and you it's more than complicated
I'll deal with the complications even if we only spend mere seconds of belonging to each other