Put my throat at the end of a knife,
Torture all your critics until they die,
Face the punishment in the afterlife,
All for you, accept my sacrifice.

Paint the walls crimson with my blood,
Decorate my skin with scars and cuts,
**** somebody with an accidental shove,
For you are the one I love.

Stick needles in my brain,
Even if it drives me insane,
Demolish the people in your way,
This untouched skin I want you to trace.

Somehow, I don't care if you don't do the same for me,
Just kiss me for a while until you leave;
You can't escape me anyway, honey,
Because I'll be stuck haunting in your dreams.

Ahead of me are storm clouds gathering.
Gathering violently.
I can't escape this each time.
My time to leave.
My time to run,
I'm sorry I just can't outrun it this time.
But in the nic of time,
I get swept up.
There's no way to get out of it now.
These storm clouds are of a different variety.
Ones full of different emotions.
Ones full of hate.
No matter how hard you try,
You can't outrun family.

You lie to me
but call me a friend
You lie to her
and call her a friend
Friends don't lie,
pal.
Something trivial
Something dumb
Another lie
slips your tongue
Why do you fib?
Why do you pretend?
What is the truth
Do you even trust us?
I've known you for years
but yet
I'm
not good enough
for you
to tell the truth to

Sleeping on a loveseat
in a crowded living room
waking up in the morning
tap tap tap on my leg
"You have to babysit," she says,
walking out the door with her husband
My mother, oh my mother
left me here again,
with three kids
I know she has to work,
I know she's got bills to pay
but I wish I had some time to myself
to be 16
like I'll never be again
I want to learn to drive,
I want to catch fireflies at 12 a.m
with bare feet sliding in the dewy grass
I'm only 16 my brain says
no, wait, not even 16
not yet
I want to learn to make my own mistakes
and not have to be an influence
I know this is my life..
but I wish I didn't sleep all the time.
Depressed, anxiety
I really wonder what's wrong with me
I want to love myself
like the love I give to everybody else
I want to get good grades
and kiss the night away
I want to cuddle up in a big warm bed
beside my lovely
but no
I'm sleeping on a loveseat
in a crowded living room
wondering what's wrong with me
to wake up in the morning
to birds singing the same tune.

-

I tried to count the minutes
but I ran out of time
So I’ll just write this poem,
forcing out a rhyme

When will it start to happen
just like I’ve heard them say
Will it begin tomorrow
or several months away

The emptiness keeps growing,
this pain within my heart
I can’t believe the ending,
remembering the start

I just can’t stop the crying,
my face now drenched in tears
Staring at a future
filled with lonely years

How does it become easy
when all I want to do
Is wake up every morning,
a sunny day with you

But now my days are cloudy,
the rain keeps falling down
Where once I wore a smile,
holds nothing but a frown

Every day is different,
though all are just the same
I stare off to the distance
calling out your name

They say it will get easier,
just wait and you will see
I don’t want to see anything
if you’re not here with me

Life now has no meaning,
darkness comes to call
Weakness is my shadow
on my knees I fall

I tried, but I can’t say that
my broken heart is fine
So I’ll just write this poem
forcing out a rhyme

Isn't it astonishing,
   The amount of hate
That humans have for
        Each other?

If only that same effort
    Was used to threaten
The crooked hand holding
          Us captive.

I would hate to lose my vision
because the world is so beautiful
still, serene, peaceful water,
bright blue skies filled with gray stratus clouds,
dew drops on freshly grown green grass
muddy brown creeks,
with small skipping rocks bouncing,
splashing,
a little kitten, barely old enough
to open sweet little eyes
Tall trees covered in powdery snow,
small puppy prints in the blanket of crisp white velvet

I would hate to lose my sense of hearing
because there's an abundance of sweet sounds.
Kittens purring,
wind blowing,
pitter-pattering rain on an old tin roof,
soft snoring of your lover beside you
people's chatter in the street
laughing ringing out clearly