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 Aug 2020 nina
Naomi
Puddles
 Aug 2020 nina
Naomi
Hello,  I am a puddle person.
I'm certainly not the only puddle person, of course.
And I often think I'm more puddle then person.

I lay on the floor still.
People come by and see themselves reflected in me.
Sometimes they step in me,  and drops of me splish around and evaporate.

I'm content being a puddle it's, comfortable.
People are aware of me whether looking at themselves, tip toeing around me or jumping in.

I am NOT invisible.

Love me or hate me this puddle person isn't going anywhere,
until I become more puddle then person.
 Apr 2020 nina
T
I Picked
                 Up
                       The
                             Broken
                                    Remnants
             Of
                 My
                      Heart
                              Just
                                      To
            Let
                  You
                        Break
                                Them
                                       More
 Jul 2017 nina
Broken Arpeggio
I am dangerous...

It's haunting
This hold I have over you
You become so weary and weak
My grip tightens
And everything slowly fades away
Until you can hardly breathe

You mustn't ever speak of me
So they will never know
Exactly what I'll do to you
And the shame that starts to grow

My deceitful assurances comfort you
They entice to draw you near
My promise is I will hurt you
And prey on all your fears

The only guarantees I have
Is that my promise is a lie
You cannot take the beating I'll give
No way that you'll survive

No matter what you say or do
You know how this will end
So consider turning away right now
Your last chance before we begin

I am dangerous for you...
It's haunting how an ED vows to conquer every aspect of one's life until rational thoughts no longer exist!
 Jul 2017 nina
Silver Lining
I've been having thoughts lately,
of a future, MY future.

You are not in this future,
you aren't even welcome in the present.

I've tried and tried to push you out
but you just aren't getting it.

I tried bringing in outside help,
restraining orders and cops at the doors.

But you came back and now we're back together,
you waited until the protection was gone.

You pulled me right back to you- you *******,
I was finally thinking I was strong enough on my own.

I want to break up.

I want a divorce.

I want my mind back.

I want my LIFE back.
I've been thinking a lot about this off and on again relationship of abuse and false protection. When, oh when, will you leave me be? And do I really want that?
 May 2017 nina
Vale Luna
Confetti!
 May 2017 nina
Vale Luna
(a.k.a. What You Must Have Been Thinking)

“Let's make confetti
With your little paper heart!
Smaller and smaller
Until there's nothing left to split apart.”

“Let's make confetti
And throw your feelings up in the air!
Shred it down to scraps
Until there's nothing left to tear.”

“Let's make confetti
With your diminished, pathetic soul!
Ripping up your spirit
Until we've left nothing whole.”

“Let's make confetti
With your miniscule emotions!
Leave them completely trashed
Until there's nothing left to be broken.”

“Let's make confetti
With your fragile paper heart
Punctured and torn
So your love can never restart.”
 May 2017 nina
Vale Luna
The best idea

Is the one I never thought of.
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