You tell me to grow up
To stop being a child

That I am being weak
I don't actually hurt that bad

Well news flash:
I am a child
And I do hurt that bad

Society says

Don't cry;
That's weak

Don't talk about pain
That's selfish

Don't be smart
That's nerdy

Don't talk much
That's annoying

Don't be yourself
That's stupid

I hate myself
I really do
Everything about myself
It's awful

The way I can't ever explain how I feel
Just right

Or how I am so freaking
Ugly

The way no one likes me
Because I don't fit in

How I never sleep
And cry each night

I hate myself
Totally and completely

Someone told me that this is selfish
Well I'm sorry
I'll just quit trying to hate myself
Because this pain is clearly intentional

**I hate myself

Do you ever feel alone?
Not just alone, but
...alone.

Everything is kind of empty,
and you can't quite feel whole.
Sure, there are people around,
but you don't really feel there,
or maybe it's they who aren't there.

It's not just alone,
it's *lonely.

Dear Layla,

Thanks so much
You ruined my life
Congratulations
I know you tried

All those mean words
They hurt
I pretended they didn't
But they did
And still do

"You're fat"
"You're lazy"
"You're stupid"
"You're slow"
"No one likes you"

It's fine though
You can say those things
It's a free country
Just know:

If I **** myself,
It's on you