I made a mistake
It's caused my heart to break
I didn't realize what was at stake

The look of terror in your eyes
Filled me full of self-despise
Three months is too short I now realize

My kisses of poison
For no other reason
But to provide your addiction

Pain and terror
I'm such a monster
I'm now starting to wonder

Do you really love me?
Or am I that scary?
Have I lost you, Baby?

I'm on the edge
Leaning over this ledge
Back to you, I am needing a bridge

I'll go shut down
Maybe just drown
In the the tears from your frown

I gave you my soul
Wasn't that a costly toll?
You trace my scars
or are you drawing prison bars?

I tell you what i hate
Your friends i try to tolerate
I dont like this new nitch
Your not usually a *****

I love you
But it can be hard
You blame yourself for my crash
But then turn to conform with those I Bash

What does it take?
Just drive in the stake
Since Im such a life sucker
Atleast i could get away with my ******

Since im soulless
Since I hold you back
Since Im just a punk
Since I died to you

Rip my guts out and hang them like streamers
Run my skin in a grinder and have your confetti
Spike my blood with all your *****
Fry my fingers in the greaser

Throw my brain and heart in the trash
Burn my eyes and ears and lips and tongue
Use my bones to build a bed
Boil my nerves so i wont feel pain

But leave my feet
They are what i didnt use
I should walk, no run, away
But i already cut them off so it would be easier to end me

The perfect ******
My own death
Ill naught be caught
Ill finally get what i deserve

The ultimate gift of life?
Can i just skip it to hell?
I wish i had died that day
Why couldnt I have gone faster?

Let the white turn red
With what i have bled
Here is your christmas cheer
Feed my ashes to your ******* reindeer

Happy Holidays
Merry Christmas
Let me do this perfect ******
Then you can say your happy and merry a little cheerier

It's the way you talk
The way you walk
Its the way you are around me

Your smile makes me warm and fuzzy
Your laugh makes me dizzy
Its just the way you are around me

Trying to cuddle closer
Trying to hug me tighter
Its just how you are

The longest good-byes
The twinkle in your eyes
Its the way you are around me

I love you with all my heart
And you love me with yours
Its just the way we are

Wake up in the morning
Hes slammming on the door
I yell im up so he could hear me
He screams back and i just ignore

I step out to go and make food
He gets angrier and yells louder
"Do a work out, Lose weight"
I blow it off, dont let it bother

Disrepsectful?
I hate you!
Bipolar?
Thats you!
The reason I hate life?
Guess who!

Its a day of thanks
A day of family
it really stinks
tell me this is trickery

I cant go anywhere
I cant do anything
I cant be me
without your disapproval

Go ahead and scream
It doesnt phase me anymore
Around you im in a bad dream
to me you are no more

My mind is shattered
My life is battered
My friends are scattered
This isnt to be desired

I couldnt come to look at you
I couldnt bear the icy blue
I know you doubt what i say is true
But I really do need you

My closest friend
to the end
A friendship too strong to bend
But now I just want to mend

I shut down
Taking all I have to not frown
I must seem like such a clown
All I want to do is drown

My life should be over
Call for the Undertaker
I never have been such a crier
Is there nothing that can make this better?

Little Red
Red Head
I want you to know what I have said
I need you to get off the death bed

My silent screams
The return of dreams
It almost feels like we are on separate teams
I shouldn't have believed the way things seem

I just need you to forgive
I need you to help me live
I never should have been so assumptive
Me out of your life is easily conclusive

I shut down
I change myself
I **** my soul
Never cared for, I never knew

I didnt ever want you hurt
I had no clue that I mattered
I didnt want to lose you
So I threw you away

I shut you out
I shut down
I shut...
I...
...

We bonded over god
We kept each other sane
I decided to go a little deeper and then everything changed?
what happened?

We swore to change the world
We were going to fix religion
No one would stop us
but the only thing to change was your mind
What happened?

You were my best friend
but you died and got replaced
Same body, same soul,
What changed?
what happened?

different time, different place... i guess
but you changed so suddenly
i randomly committed blasphemy?
what happened

you lost your mind
but i guess you got hers
we were all good friends
but i was a heretic?
or did you become fanatic?
what happened?

we knew i wouldn't change
we knew id stay the same
the only question to me is
what happened?

I love to hang topside down
It creates a false smile on my face
Reversing my frown
to put me in a better place

You make this unnecessary
You give help me to make that grin
Even though I'm very wary
You still make my head spin

I smile that lie
and laugh falsely
You give a disapproving eye
but never lash at me

The world has made mistakes
it has its own errors
I do my best to forget and forgive
but its just a new way to live

Her sky blue
His dull hazel
My demon green
Every pair a mere reflection
Or window to the pain

Her eyes show her death wish
Avoiding my gaze with quick swish
of her hair.  Those blue eyes
They tell us no lies

His eyes show the hidden dejection
They show a fear of rejection
Those hazels dulled now
Always forcing mine to bow

My eyes the demonic curse
I couldnt think of anything worse
They twist the world
To an image i could behold

We three friends
Three pairs of eyes
Three types of pain
Three prisoners who want to be free

Only the night
Lets me to go fight
Lets her go to the knife
and will let him have a life

These dying eyes
We each despise
They give us away
They always betray

The false glee
Revealing the desire to be free

i hid my face
i was a disgrace
i was the oddball
i hated the hall

you saw that i was hurt
you came and helped me
i was a crude and short
you gave me a taste of free

free of fears
free of the bully
free of conformity
free of tears

you became my brother
a quiet protector
you kept away what i hated
even if you were a lil twisted

you cared
you helped
you supported
you heard

there is no way
i could repay
all the things you did
so all i can say is thank you

I look into the mirror
and recoil in pure horror
A monster stares back at me
Hating everything I see

And see the scars you inspired
It was all about the love you required
I don't see what it was
I don't see what you saw

You lied to me
You said I made you happy
You said we would be together
It was going to be for forever

I fill with anger and hit the wall
I see it now, the reason to appall
My face, my acne, my twisted image
I look at all the baggage

I look into that reflection
I  am suddenly filled with new conviction
I start to carve at,
I start to slice off the fat

I smile as I see the blood
I laugh at the piled flesh
I know that it ruins that twisted image
But you are gone, you have left

The twisted image
The pure idea
The love I felt
The pain I feel

There is no more me
That silly image
that made this *******
Only you ,who begged me to stay, can set me free

We sat there
we were a happy little pair
I could always make you smile
even though i had to try for awhile

Then she came along
we both knew it was wrong
i quickly lost what i hard worked to gain
I ignored the look of pain
in your eyes
I feel like i severed our ties

You are my best friend
From when we first met
And then the world turned
I started to ignore when you would fret

I paid less attention to your wants
I simply concentrated on my desires
I care bout you still
I will try harder if ,permit me, you will
I am riddled in the scars of my errors and my failures
Being your friend was my greatest success

But I let the world turn
and i watched yours burn

and if you will let me
I could help to set you free

Let the pain rain down on me
Let it hurt like falling from the tree
that we would talk from while we hunted
You were my idol but now im scared
You were my father but now your gone
Your a faded image
A miserable mirage

You arent the man i was born too
All you ever do
is make me want to hurt
You call me failure
You call me mistake
You call me all the things i already know

I tried to be positive
I tried to set an example
I tried, I tried, I tried,
But I always come up short
I always made an error

I was once bound to thinking you perfect
But now I am Free

You told me you care
that you would always be there
I wanted to have faith
but that's a mere wraith
I gave you my soul
and you put me in a hole
When ever i tried to climb you just pushed me down
You always blamed me for the reasons of your frown
I am done with you now
I will no longer bow

Your power over me is broken
and I am now free