Nights are heartless
The stars are dying
My will,
My breath
Is running out.
I lost my life
In your dark woods.
Howling,
Your love slew me.
The cold unknown
Cut without mercy.
Now I see only one-way streets.
Useless friendships
Waving me goodbye.

**** "romance"
**** flowers
**** the minutes
**** the hours
**** the greedy
**** the smug
**** the lonely
**** the loved
**** the gorgeous
**** the ugly
You never meant
that much to me
**** Cupid
**** lust
**** fakery
**** trust
**** Hallmark
**** affection
**** guilt
**** expectation
**** devotion
**** foreplay
But most of all —
**** VALENTINE'S DAY

A fraction of joy,
think of me
As if
there were something to miss.
Bury flowers in my heart
So beauty

could take hold.
I remember
the look on your face —
So serious.
As if some treacherous
harm,
Were inflicted.
Let me wish
For no more,
As wishes
Are the death of
Rational thought.

I am worthless
Leave me be
Festering,
With ****** shame
No radiance
Only a light that burns
The White Heat
Slowly,
Choking me.
Welcome
To this world of hurt
SPIT YOUR ASHES IN THE DIRT.

Lover —
This is not your home.
You are no longer
Welcome.
I mean to tear you away,
                  tear you apart.
We were entwined,
We were enamoured.
We were.
Midnight passed,
Hostilities
Commenced.
Wounds
Reopened.
All truths spat.
All bets told.
I will cut you from
My heart.
I will erase
Your name.
Lover —
You are no longer
Welcome.

I hear their voices, raised
in joy—merriment
A singular enrapture
Golden throated
days of summer.
How could you disown such love?
I hear their voices,
Tho that is all.

Dreadful Monday
Sitting here
Among the idiot
Chatter severe
Blank expressions
Garbled words
Under the radar
Unseen, unheard
Counting seconds
Losing my head
Anxiety stricken
Better off dead
Another appointment
Facing the spotlight
"How have you been?"
Everything's alright
Exit in haste
Sickening refrain
Back to uncertainty
Into the rain.

I'm so tired
Of chasing you
All the empty people
Can go to hell.

Forget the love
I poured into your wounds.
It won't heal you
Anymore.
Forget the times
I consoled you,
The care that languished
In my words,
Gently lingering.

I'm so tired
Of chasing you
All the empty people
Can go to hell.

tired expectation
Once as a life
Struggled on
In search of silver hearts
& sober conversation
Now fettered
Against the bedposts
Drowning
Beneath the covers
In remembrance to burning loves.

That person you saw,
The one you greeted,
You looked into his eyes
Hoping to see
everything you knew.
He was not there.
Only a vague notion
Parroting the requisite words,
Without conviction.
This automaton that stomps
the tar to get from A to B,
Isn't really going anywhere.
The conversations we had
Never took place,
Just phantom dialogues.
Recall them, if you can.
I've been gone for so long.
Unable to return.

The certainty of this world
Caught me off guard.
I saw no trace of rot
Or ruin,
Just a love and desire
That blinded me,
All truth served only to deceive —
Secrets became wounds.
Familiarity—Invasion.
Your place removed.
... in your shadow.
These dying glories
Leaving words rattled in my skull.
Love became an ungodly deed,
Made only to *******.
My dying desperation
For your rejection and scorn,
Just a change of priorities,
Nothing personal
Try to forget.
I won't text or call.
Great will
A final act of love.
No way forward,
No way back.

My heart is a bloodhound,
Relentless in nature.
Bounding giddily toward oblivion.
Without remorse
or comprehension.
My heart is a hammer,
Blunt, forceful.
Each obstacle in its path
a nail.
My heart is driftwood,
Lost among the waves,
Ebb and flow —
Futile.
Without destination.

Will the happy moments go,
Will the secrets start to show,
Will all words turn to lies,
Will there be x's in my eyes?

You can't know
The effect it had
Losing you
Tectonic plates shifting,
In agony
The love that protected me
Turned on its edge
Only now I saw that power
Raw and terrifying.
You can't know

Every day is silently ending.
While your love remains,
Embedded like a splinter
—  in my heart.
You taught me so much.
Each day a lesson.
                  a blessing.
                  a joy.
I'm enraptured,
Helpless.
In the dying light.

I'm sorry if I can't remain.
It's always winter,
Without you.

Life is a slow death
Remembering
all we
had and lost,
Against our will
We found the cost
Beyond our reach
And so
We cry
and dream of life
Though we must die.
Despite the struggle
Despite the pain,
I'd still do it all again
To see you
One
more
time.

The wound
So deeply bitten
It left but mangled flesh,
Young God
Picked apart
So savagely under the
weight of love.

My idiot words cannot express
The dying that I feel inside
Instead they
Idly show distress
So foolishly, I hide.
Each day sadly lingers on
Repeating endless
Misery.
Another timeless
Wave of dread,
Upon this blackened sea.
Unlike the rest
Who pray and toil
To forever leave their mark,
I want to vanish
Without trace
Buried in the dark.