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 Oct 2018 may
Moni
I don’t want to shed another tear,
I don’t want to burn my precious skin.
I don’t want my heart to ache another second knowing that I’ll never be good enough for you
I don’t want to be emotionally numb
I don’t want to spend another minute hating myself.
I don’t want to breakdown the thought of gaining a single pound.
I don't want to avoid human contact because of the thought that they will see me how I see myself.
I don’t want to love the feeling of hunger.
I don’t want to tear myself into pieces
I don’t want to see the beauty in the sick
I don’t want to weigh myself every 10 minutes
I don’t want to spend 3 hours pacing around my backyard
I don’t want to live in this constant l nightmare
I just want to be happy.
I want to be good enough.
I was to change for the better,
But it's harder than you think.
 Oct 2018 may
Lily
Social Anxiety
 Oct 2018 may
Lily
Too many people,
Too many faces, and not
Enough time to breathe.
 Oct 2018 may
empty seas
i’m trying to be better
a better leader
a better friend
a better student
a better person
and it’s hard
every step feels like dragging my feet through syrup
but i can feel improvement

i am starting to love myself
to love the way my mind
finds comfort in learning
to love the way
i’m good at things

i feel more free now
no longer someone’s crutch
but now i feel a solid future under my feet
instead of constantly being pushed down

i’m not quite happy yet
not as happy as i was
ignorant happiness is hard to beat
some days i crave intimacy
but i am not a dependent person
and i will wait until i’m better before pursuing someone else
it’s the right choice
being independent is something I’ve been priding myself on more recently
It just feels so nice to not be someone’s crutch for once, it’s like I can finally breathe, I’m really trying to use this to better myself though
A lot of people I know when they’re upset they just give up and never try to make things better and I’ve been desperately trying to avoid that
Anyway
Weird rant over
 Sep 2018 may
Semi-literate Poet
Do you think a girl could love a boy who writes for her a million poems?  That's what I plan to do.
 Sep 2018 may
f
purgatory
 Sep 2018 may
f
are you happy
or just going through the motions of a happy person?
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