it was a cold september night
you didn't even say goodbye
i shined a light against the pavement
just so i could see
i never thought it'd end like that
sometimes goodbye is just so strange
so i'm laying here
remembering
and counting all the days

Thesis:


There's an easy way to disprove
that ignorance equals bliss:

                              Your eyes

were puzzles of space-time,
studied through conversations
fervent in their background noise-
where I looked for one single oddity
in what might have been the ordinary,

except it wasn't. Space-time
distorts around things of great

                                        gravity

and your light-consuming pupils
pulled me towards you. Complexity,
hidden in some unsuspecting darkness
that I was dragged into...
things I didn't understand
until I reach our event horizon

      and you and I are one.


(As for my thesis: what great Nothing would we have been
if I skyrocketed away
for fear of the unknown?)

when you were gone i stopped coming around
i could taste your voice in every sound
did my best and held my tongue
your breath just wouldn't leave my lungs
i knew the hurt you'd given me
a dark gift meant for me to receive
revisit a memory at the end of the day
because it's not like you loved me anyways

When I've left home &

the only thing left of me is holes

where all my pictures used to be

don't bother with pretending

like you care enough to be calling

Only the
past is set
in stone,
my friend.

You don't have
to continue
being the
person you
were
yesterday.

from the mind it flows
traveling through my veins
down my bones.
every part of me rages
for comfort and ignorance.
I erupt,
my emotions drain
oh I wish
I wish I cared less.

i do not believe in soul mates
however souls, i put all my faith in
i do not believe in love at first sight
which is convenient considering i cannot manage to remember when i first saw you.
i do not believe in true love
however there are many loves that are true
i do not believe in perfection
however i love every inch of you
even the parts that i hate
even the parts i do not believe in
i do not want to be naive
i do not want to be cracked open
i do not want to be known
yet i'd say anything, do anything
im as impulsive as the storms that rage outside my window
i think of you
i think of doubts
i do my best not to think
if you were here then i couldn't

I've come to accept that all of my worries about tomorrow and how I'll be remembered yesterday
has manifested itself into something far greater than stress.
And I know living with this
            state-of-mind
can only make every situation worse instead of ever getting better.
But right now,
       in this moment,
                     I am okay.

And that is good
enough for me.