I feel like I'm just watching life,
Like an ocean trapped within a picture frame.
Then, there are those sometimes
When the sea breaks free of its frame
And swallows me whole.

Instant messaging.
Instagram.
Facebook.
Twitter.
E-mail.
Texts.

Technology's heart
Has a billion beeps per minute.
Ding goes the notification.
Tap go the fingers, typing
Out the immediate response.
Can't seem to keep up,
Living life with my thumbs.
There is only one message
That I've never read.
I'll never read it.
It's the last one you sent,
And, there won't be a response.
Cell service doesn't work in heaven.

For you.
My dearest friend and my sweetest
                                                 down
                                                            f
                                                              a
                                                                l
                                                                  l

It was during a spring rain that
I finally understood my desperate
Obsession with poetry.
With writing.
With why I write.
It was in the silence,
In the drawn breath between the
Impact of the first raindrop and
The shattering of the second
That I remembered something
I had always known, but never
Given voice to.
I write, not only to put a piece
Of myself on paper,
Immortalization, in a way,
But because I was searching
For something. Searching for some
Forgotten and lost part of myself.
Thinking, maybe in the words I say
And the words I don't,
And the reasons in between,
I would find my missing piece.
The other half of my soul.

Twirling around.
Heart thudding.
World spinning.
For a moment,
I'm so infinite.

I won't stop
Until my legs
Collapse from
Under me.

As I'm twirling
It doesn't have
To ever end.
The moment I
Stop, I'll crash
Into the ground.
My reality so
Off-kilter and
So distorted.

I'm dreaming?
What? You're not?
Why would you
Deny me my
Moment of joy.
Reality will strike
Soon enough.
Let me have my
Fantasy moment.  

You're still here?
Don't hold your breath.
I'll keep spinning until
Reality crashes in.

Some people speak
In riddles, but I
Speak in quotes.
One day, I will find
My own words to
Say what I'm thinking,
But, until then, these
Half applicable words that
Someone else wrote
Will have to be enough.
Maybe, one day, I'll
Have the courage to step
Out from behind someone
Else's florid prose.
But, until then,
Shakespeare and Dickinson
And Eliot and Twain and
Dr. Seuss and Homer and Dante
Will fall from my lips
As trees shed their leaves.

You'll never see me in any photo
But I'm always there.
I'm the one behind the camera;
I take the pictures.
You need a picture to
Remember people
When they're gone,
But I'll never forget.
I'm the funny face
Behind the smiling faces.
I'm the countdown
Behind the "cheese."
You are the spoken words,
And I am what you don't say.
You will fade away
and I, I will remain.