I spend this remaining time thinking of you. This song floats my mind on its stormiest day. I wait for it to calm, but you are all that stays. No matter how much I shake, you stay like a snow globe; no matter how much is around you, your face is a clear picture. This melody sends me back to a time where everything was okay. I sway to the beat wishing you were in my arms. I wish the brightest day was when you smiled in front of me. Your eyes spray sunshine, but our memories tear me apart. I wonder if you'll ever read my pointless poems. I've spent too long regretting what never could be. I'm sitting behind a phone listening for the moment I can burst into a conversation with you, but its 1 am.

It was you, it was you who stole my dreams.

My hands tremble from the burden you give me. My time is taken from the burden you bestow upon many. My check is limited from the black coal you hold so dear. I clock in, I clock out. My back aches of misery and advil. I lye on my death bed waiting to realize that today, today I am awake, but far from alive..

Longing for a breath to fill my lungs, Waiting to stop my anxious hands, Hesitating my every move., Obfuscated on my very being. I  feel trapped inside myself, and stressed about the tomorrow. I wake up to realize that is just how life works...

Baby please don't be afraid to show your true colors, I'm color blind anyways.

My deepest feelings are through my fingertips, as I etched my life through pain and happiness. I tried shading myself Into something I'm not, but I felt the deepest affinity when I rolled my fingers over the work of art you made yourself into.

I saw your spirit and burned it to your skin. I held you in my arms and told you it would be okay. I told you I loved you and I meant it. Forgive me of my faults. Forgive the condemned selfless boy you once knew. I ask for your savior and I'm sorry I asked too late.

I drown out your voice by not caring about you anymore.

You find yourself in the creases of someone's heart.
You find yourself in the depths of a beautiful mind.
You find yourself locked into that one book no one else reads.
You find yourself lost in the commotions of pointless drama.
You find yourself in a little bit of everything, but today you  found yourself stirring into trouble you should have left alone.

I'm bounded by shackles, I'm locked in a cell and all I have is my dignity. I have high hopes for the next generation but first I have to look up from my phone. I have to unplug my shackles and delete my media. I have to meet people behind the thin screen of my curse and addiction.

Death seduces the weak, and ignores the strong. Suicide roams the air like its a new drug. Death is found in every home, and the last adventure I want to take. I grow to find myself growing weak, anticipating death to kiss me in the moonlight. My world has been spinning, only to see the devil is dancing with us all.

I wear my skin like a shirt, because I am not myself.

These days grow shorter, these words grow dim, my voice is left unheard and you are left on stage. I use to write words of wisdom, now the only thing I write Is my life working 9-5. I use to flow with feelings, pushing me to write poetry, and now I can barely manage to write a paragraph. I use to be myself, and now I'm cast into my own deep thoughts. I've had my share of scars, but none ere as deep as the one you left on me, none were as painful as the sting that rings through my head everytime I see you. I've heard of you, I've heard of the things you've done. My life was perfect without you, and you just show up unannounced. I'm tired of shoving you down with these pills, and washing it away with drugs. I'm tired of dealing with explanations on "why do you have scars?" I'm tired  of calling you a disorder. You have  yourself wrapped around my heart and turned my brightest light. Into my darkest fears. I'm done with this. Leave me and never turn back. I'm tired of feeling people you are my depression.

Blue is the depth of your eyes, grazing over my very being. The little black hole that pulls me in this web of pure affection. I wish to be tangled in this forever and hope to find you spending every waking moment seeing us grow.

I threw words like the were yesterdays news headlines. One after one they missed the purpose I was trying to hit. I spun my mind in ways only imaginable in a 2 dimensional world. I've put my blood and sweat into forming a single sentence that will only be discarded for a commoner to pick up. You've read me like a book, but you can never discuss what im about because I am an endless series of pain and happiness that can only be fully read from someone who is willing to see the end.

Death marches through every bodies life. It rolls through your family, it takes your favorite memories and in the end it takes us all. Death has no emotion and sees no pain. Write down every happy moment so the day death takes you, your memories never go forgotten.

I slip in a daze and I tip the *****. I throw my life in the garbage and my bottles on the night stand. I've had emotions until the bitter poison hit my blood stream. I'm nothing but a drunken mess.

Without a past there is no future, but without a future then there is no past, I guess that only means we can live in the moment.

I slip into a daze of dishonesty and regret. What's to stop me? Your 'rules' have no affect if they are broken easily. I need a new dimension to comprehend how treating others as inferiors, if you were to step Down from that balcony, maybe you can hear the cries of desperation and inferno filled hate. Listen to the "inferiors" next time you look in a mirror.

She asked if I was real. How am I to answer this? Of course I have a soul and a heart so yes I am real, but am I? Am I ready to start over again? Shouldn't I be asked if I am okay first?

Don't be offended by hurtful words. The fact that the person is taking the time to tell you shows they have a little interest in you. Take what they say and embrace it, because in the future they will loathe that you are strong.

Stretch your vocabulary, and speak to me like I am a canvas. Treat me like abstract art. Try to learn me, and try to see that I am different. Spill your ink on the floor, and see how it forms. You can't see what isn't yet. You can't assume or guess someone's  lifestyle. Pay attention to the crease on my shirt. See the smile that brings plenty more. You are too far gone for me to bring you back. You have set out for something I can't attend, so please remember me when you can. Remember the laughs we shared, and the kisses that came behind our love. Remember that you will always hold my love, and you will never have to feel something different.

How dare you call me. I spent every night for three years waiting for you. I spent my days crying because of you. I had to make a man of myself. I lost you in a fire for all I care. I wrote words of beauty and you never noticed behind that beer glass. How am I to be proud of myself if you never were. You wasted 18 years so don't you dare call me again. I've seen the unknown and felt the light of happiness. You are no father, you are a drunk in the hell you created. You're alone, now dig yourself out. I've never had the gut to say it but ******* and have a nice day.

You live under a roof of psychotic misfits. You have such a gentle soul and should not waste time arguing with someone who will not see your value. You are blood but you have no ties to them. Choose your family cause sometimes the one that's provided will throw you under the bus.

I strangle myself to see what my last words will say.  I bleed the past as it flows from the evil inside. I've grown so much, but my actions have only haunted my future. I take a step forward to see that my path is a circle. My emotions are waiting to explode, but nothing will come of that. I fear new paths, but it seems this one had only lead me to the hatred that ignites my flames.

You spoke in tongue as if I understood. You moved your body as if gravity wasn't a problem. You burrowed yourself deep inside of my heart, but for some reason, you just don't feel foreign. My fingertips glide across my chest, searching for the musical beat you set in play. This feeling overwhelms my senses, and I find myself blinded by beauty. When you spoke in tongue, it was so new, but now I understand and I want to say "I love you too"

When you let go of someone important, don't regret letting them go. As pain seeps into every empty space they left, you will find yourself remember only the good. Remember everything they left, for when you come to realize how much better you can be, all of those memories will become apart of you. They will be nothing but something that had happened. Happiness comes with getting yourself back up. Lost ones don't leave holes in your heart, they leave all of the thoughts you use to have, but now it's time to move on. You're doing everything they want you to do. Pick yourself up and prove you can be your own person.

Your body motions for me to follow, but where are we going? You held the match to a candle and the shadows danced upon the walls. Our bodies connected for eternity. These days without you pain me, but I know soon our shadows will dance among the moonlit sidewalk. Until I see you again I wish you all the love from the depths of this bottomless heart.

You give me too much attention. Let go of what hurts and stay positive. You may find yourself stuck between a rock and a hard place, but hard places tend to be broken and go away. Take your pain and place it on a shelf for you to laugh at later. Give me nothing but silence so I can enjoy my peace and space.

I cast you into the unknown so I can have peace. I say farewell so I can never say hello. I drown myself in happiness so I can forget pain existed. Live life to your standards and not mine. I am no measuring of happiness so don't waste time on me but yourself. To this I say once, Goodbye.

You're asleep while i'm awake waiting to see the day of light to dance upon your sweet caramel covered skin.

My heart is cold this is true, but it's not as cold as when you let go of it before giving it back. Not as cold as when you steeped it in what I thought was "love" and then peel back the plastic casing with a joking laugh. My heart is cold because you left it with no warmth. It's cold because I was left in the dark with no light and two options. My heart may be cold but it will never be as cold as the blade that ran through me for the last time. You can say it was suicide but it was never the same, because I've always felt dead around you, And I'm still apologizing for getting my cold hearted blood on your knife. Excuse me for my ignorance. I promise there won't be a next time.

My inner demons give greetings to those who are willing to stay long enough. I learned to talk to myself.

It was me. It wasn't the angel that had become my everything. It wasn't the life my had become, but it was me. It was the lies that rolled off my tongue like it happened centuries ago. It was the addiction that dug me deep enough to see no way it. It wasn't the perfect girl who did everything for me. It was me, that dug myself so far all I can do is tell myself that I messed up.

I am no king. I am merely a shadow left in the dust from those who are burned from the flames of hate and poverty. I am no king. I have no jewels, I have no voice, I do not have a guard to defend me from the man who truly does have power. I feel pain and live a hell satan couldn't create. I am no king, so don't make me out to be one princess.

As I paint my mind with nostalgia, the memories flood through. These thoughts keep me in an infinite loop of regret. It's been so long since I've seen you, but I understand we became toxic. I suffer from each memory, laughing like it happened yesterday, but crying because it happened a year ago. This pain never weakens, I just become resilient to the constant reminder that I ****** up. If my words never meant anything, than I'm left with a blank page and emotions I cannot decipher. I get anxiety when I feel you're close to me, but I also get excited knowing that I might actually get to see you. I've had my wrongs in the past, but each one is replayed... Each one is my imprisoned thought.

I use to spend everyday doing the same routine. When I realized the pain I've caused myself and others I continued to do them. The little voice in my head told me to cause pain so I can feel numb when I fall. I spread blades across my floor and lead scars amongst my skin. I have hurt you and myself. I feel no l remorse so accept that I am insane.

I see a warrior behind all the wounds you called a "accident"

My past has choked you, burned you, and left you to save yourself. Now that time has caught up, you still rage with anger. Your words become choppy, your decisions seem random, and your mind seems stuck. The lies that ran from my mouth have been repented. I've served my time in the shadows. I've seen myself for who I was, but many things have changed. You've changed most of all, and I apologize for your self loss. I hope you still grow stronger, and rely on something other than fear and anger. You'd make a great citizen, and excellent writer, but most of all.. A great teacher.

My hands tremble like an earthquake, my breath freezes in my own sorrow, my head spins like a merry-go-round. Some find it fun to ride and some fine it bitter and nasty. My feet can't even fit themselves so how can I fit anyone else's? I got rags on my back and a smile on my face but no one can tell the difference. I'm stuck in a hole with a rope and a blade so which one will I choose? I'm not smart enough to choose the rope because I guess I'm not bright,. It could be because my life has been in the dark and its what I'm used too, or it could be because my mind is tainted from the hell my parents have left me. I'm just waiting for it to freeze over like the cold hearted souls it affects.

I bleed on paper, and you try to decipher it like they are words. There are no hidden secrets in my writing. Just a guy behind his phone trying too hard.

Your twilight shadow danced among the stars. To each step my heart pounded as my ears took in the sweet symphony you played on my heart. As midnight passed you vanished into the depths of my imagination, only to text me you love me the following morning.

I wake up every morning to your lovely messages. I have done nothing to deserve the happiness you fill me with. You are so beautiful and smart and just right. You have made me see what I have never approached and I am thankful. You are the next piece to this puzzle and you are defiantly an important piece.

it wasn't the bottle that killed me, but the lies that wrapped around my throat as you said "I love you"

Your color differs, that is true, but your color does not define you. My brother in this country please get back up. The emotional lashes upon your back are healing, and together we can stop this. My brother in strength please grab my hand, for we will change this together. My brother please help me through this journey for I am colored as well. My brother please get back up for this is not our last lash but our last time from staying down. Get up and show that racism is dead and we are not.

It took years to suppress you and only minutes to embrace. You have given me hell, but let me see some beautiful insights. I've poured you and varied you and did everything to numb you. From drugs to alcohol, self harm to counseling, and you've never died. You've made me feel things I've never wanted to feel, but I thank you for being the only thing to stay by my side.

Through the blistering fires and the piercing wounds. I stand before myself. I lay in the depths of all emotions. I rest my head on the thought of being something else but maintaining myself. I've seen the inside of every lie and truth I've ever told. I have heard the noises I made and the effects they've caused. I have finally found what I've been longing for. I have found myself at last.

Death is not the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live -Norman cousins

Your writing has staggered off path. Don't force yourself to write literature that only makes sense to you. Let your pen and paper guide you to what needs to be said. Forcing a poem will only lead to wasted time and frustration. Life is too short to force anything. Ride your emotions as if they were a theme park. Let yourself flow with them and become part of them. Your emotions know how to write, so let them see what our world is like.

My words are tainted with the bitter taste of whiskey. My hands tremble in the presence of lies and abuse. I no longer sleep and I no longer eat. I am rested in death and filled with bad thoughts and inner demons. I can only suppress them with more alcohol and the slow burning cancer stick. I no longer am a poet but a drunken teen with no future.