It's best not to hang around.
This has happened to me before.
I give up on things,
People, and Dreams,
It's kind of like slamming a door.
I know it'll hurt you.
But it could be worse.
I've taken chances with you,
And I'm sorry.
I know you'll be confused
And I can't help feeling amused.
Because this is always my story.

The girl who helps,
But who's heart remains glass
Never softened, welcomed or touched.
When someone gets close,
I push them away.
And soon I'll shatter
Because of too much pressure
And I don't want to cut you
When the peices go flying.
Because that's what happens
When people get to close to me.
And I simply can't hurt you,
So I'm setting you free.

Running through the parking lot
I keep racing.  
I can't stop.

Slowly I'm collapsing.
The blood runs down my arm.
I scream. I laugh.
My spirit isn't alarmed.

My hair is askew
My laughter fills the air.
After all I've been through,
I'm glad that he's not there.

But soon a shadow approaches.
I glance down at my stained hand.
I try to run, but he grabs my shoulders, I am not strong enough to stand.  

He holds my arm and looks at me
As tears run down his face.
"What the hell were you thinking?
You could never be replaced."

My laughter was gone
As soon as his tears escaped.
And so, as he holds me tightly,
I stare down at my knife
Now a foreign shape.

I pull free and throw it
As far as I can manage.
I take a deep breath in
As we go to repair the damage.

It's going to end,
I keep telling myself.
There's nothing in me to defend.
So I'll keep my heart on a shelf.
But how lucky was I to know you.
I loved you a whole lot,
So that's one thing that's true.
But everything else?
I don't know, I'm not sure.
Because if you
No, WHEN you leave
I'll question whether your motives were pure.
Was I used again?
Do I trust too fast?
Because if that's really true,
Then that "friend" will be my last.

She stared at the wall
Surprised by her lack of thought.
She used to stand tall
But cared more than she ought.
She thought there was a simple answer,
A way to stop the pain.
So she let the cold control her.
Never letting her heart take the place of her brain.
But now her once sparkling, gold eyes
Were dull and lacked their fire.
Because she left, at least in a way
And through this change, her control level was higher.
She thought no one would miss it.
Her laughter, her crazy mind.
And so I never knew it
Whether I was right or just blind.
And as I stare at this brick wall, I miss it.
But there's no one left for me to find.
I'm invisible.
Not to them but to me.
And believe me, I wish the answer was simple,
But I can't seem to let myself free.

My days have been all cloud and no sun
like a ribbon from a single young woman,
who's love was fresh
who's hope was right beside her
who's pride was in her friendly appearance
torn and tattered in the winds of change
chaos rains within a shattered heart

But time has tore away all the love in her soul
broken promises have ****** out all her hope
lies, betrayals, misused trust have turned her pride to dust
the wall has grown all around her
darkness in on her
pressing down upon a weakened young woman,
driving her to hidden tears
to hidden anger fits
but she's stronger than she looks

you would never believe this of this young lady
if you saw her
if you spoke to her
a long time ago you may have saw it in her eyes
but now she's mastered the art of the mask
she's mastered the art of hiding
of building walls
of not crying no matter what

she didn't shed a tear when her auntie died
she didn't let even one fall when the nightmares came for her
just like she knew they would from loving
she didn't tear up when her world was broken in one short summer
no she's not cold she's just acting cold
she wants you to think she is
so you won't become another reminder
of how much love is an enemy
cuz its kinder to let her heart go without love
than to tease it with the possibility of love

This is my goodbye, I guess.
How did I get here.
Maybe all of the stress?

Or maybe all the pain
That just won't go away.
The losses with few gains
While no one would stay.

But maybe I'm wrong
Because some people stayed,
But they'll leave before long.
im just not worth the wait.

They say some people change.
And are gone and never seen.
Just not in the same way.
This, I thought was mean.

But now I realize it's true.
And this is my goodbye.
Because my soul is simply through.
Not strong enough to fly.