It’s sickening to me,

that you’ve developed medicines to reduce my creativity.

It’s almost like I’m up to my chin in the ocean, unable to swim.

But I’m too afraid to cry,

because if I do the water level might rise,

causing me to drown in a sea of diagnosis and pills.
Losing my mind to people who think I’ve already lost it.

Thrown into a room scraping at the door trying to unlock it.

It’s driving me insane that you think my brain moving too fast does anything but save me.

I wish that who I was
would be so much more than who I am when I'm with you,
but every moment near you is the entire galaxy bursting from the inside out
stars swirling around me in bright ablaze.
Even if the look you give me is one of dissatisfaction,
those eyes are still ones that pierce a dagger into my heart.
The worst pain in the world
is realizing that a masterpiece is still a masterpiece
even when it doesn't want you anymore.
I love you.
******.
I want to scream it from the rooftops.
I know that I'm insane,
but I promise to you that my intentions are as pure as the white on your teeth.
Good Lord, I felt so secure with you.
Now that you're gone,
it's so hard to face the pain
and realize the only reason I hadn't felt it was
you were covering it.
Shadowing all of my fears and insecurities.
My heart doesn't want to believe that all it had been were pretty words said at the right time.
You know that I always have bad dreams,
but nothing is more unsettling than knowing that when I lay my head down on the pillow tonight I will have perfect memories of you.
Only when I wake up will the nightmare begin.

Find someone who makes you feel like the sun is something they made for you for extra credit in wood shop.
But don't find someone who needs extra credit.
There is going to be somebody that,
because of you,
will not understand what they're doing.
Or why they're doing it.
But they will do so.
Always.
I can promise you that someone will let you in.
Someone will show you that darkness can,
and will
swell.
But just like a sprained ankle,
it wont expand anywhere else.
Don't let your body enlarge into darkness.
Someone will tell you not to.
And someone will love you.
But you need to first understand that you are someone.
And that everybody who is someone needs someone.
Don't be afraid to be the one for yourself.

I want to wake up the sleepy corners of your elbows with my lips,
and feel the sunrise slide through your skin into your veins.
I want to taste your stretching sighs,
they'll feel like night time on my tongue.
We should stay in bed,
the trail of warmth you leave makes my insides mimic the sun itself.
Every time we touch,
it feels as if every nerve in each of my finger tips has gained its own heartbeat that races as I trace circles along your skin.
Your name tastes better than any other word that has ever escaped my lips.
My eyes drip honey when I talk about you.
My parents warned me about the drugs on the street,
but never about the ones with brown eyes and a steady heart beat.