She'll be fine, they say
You're gonna be fine
But what if fine, is simply not mine
To be? Or not, if you catch my drift
I can't see
A way in which fine is appealing
To me, fine is barely even a feeling
It's a void
A hole in which emptiness grows
And the absence of happiness blatantly shows
Even anger and spite are missed in this place
There is nothing but vast open wide empty space in this fine
As they call it
Which I shan't be at all!
I don't want just 'alright' or 'ok' at ALL
I want to be GREAT and FANTASTIC you see?
Or tragically sad would be just fine for me, as I'm
Not one to settle for anything other than
Excellent, terrible, magic, insane
Anything else is too horribly plain
For my brain as it is
In this now present day
So fine and its friends can all go away

I've never been good at
Being touched.

Though the fingers
Of endless suitors
Have traced incomparable
Lines of affection,
They all stroke
The same wounds.

New hands feel like
Recycled lullabies,
Humming promises
Of a new melody,
Singing a remedy for
My impassivity.

Whether words fall
Passionate or
Fearful,
Endearment lines my lips
With an expiration
Long enough to convince me,
But short enough to leave me.

Reminding me:
The disintegration of
Indifference
Remains
My prerequisite
For destruction.

So before you
Touch me with
Promises of a new
Orchestration,
I'm already marking the
Days until you leave.

Because my skin
Is tired of
Intruders hidden
Behind momentary
Infatuation.

So keep your hands to yourself.

Sometimes
My thirst for love is so strong
So unquenched
It makes me forget who and where and what I am
And I want to run
Run
Run away
From what?
Who knows
I turn up the noise
And run
As far as I dare
I don't listen to real life
I don't let it in
Reality cannot permeate my golden bubble
My crystal casing
It will protect me
Until it fades
Soon it will fade
Nothing will be left
Except for a few wisps
Of bright white hair and paper
To chase
Or not to chase
Don't let it fade!
Run to the light
Or find safety in the darkness
Drink up the love you find
Let breath rack your writhing body
You deserve a thrill
Then the fear comes
Light
Sirens
Real sound (so to speak like)
Lock them out!
You could run for miles
Keep breathing
Choose life
*Choose life

A trumpet blares
Throughout the night
Its sound, a nature call
Its tone is bright and vibrant
And it calls to one and all
It speaks not of the death and loss
We all must one day face
But of the life and joy we feel
When in our rightful place
Yes, sounds may laugh
And sounds may cry
And trumpets do their best
To play a melancholy tune
When one is laid to rest