have you heard the wind
the trees rustle
the wings fly by
the sea roar
watched the mountain
and wonder
sink down
on your knees
knowing this is life
the end the beginning
we are no more
than a bird a mountain a tree a leaf
a wave crash on the shore
a shell
maybe a sunrise
or a moon on the horizon
but nothing more

almost wrecked the other day
swerved brakes screamed went into a ditch and came
out the other side
no need for a seatbelt or an angel
to save me
I did it myself
saw that names and tags and saviours are all made up
I could be satan for all you know like
an angel could too on here
names mean nothing
it's how you treat your enemy
as well as how
you treat a friend
and death or a close call
are way more important than any popular demand
a child even more so
I saw all that as I slid
almost dying
churning up mud
through
that
ditch

If    I don't stop    
empathizing I am
gonna bury my ***
under souls    the
beggers
the down trodden
but I never will
no matter what pile forms atop me
If I can still breathe
I am gonna see hope from his armpit between her legs
from the bottom of humanity
and beg
just ease up all you upon me let me
have one breath ok
there now I am with you again
let's fight just get off me
run ! run , that's it
I will catch up
I am wheezing

I bled for you,
I gave into you,
I wanted to make you happy.
I have an evil soul
I can never be made whole.
No room for a savior.
No way for anyone to save me
Paint me a picture
Make the world look so much better.
There is so much that is not okay.
So much pain
Every mistaken day.
Make me feel
Something real
Little child, such kind eyes
Don’t listen to these lies
They try to take you.
They try to break you
Don’t listen.
I am broken.
I feel nothing inside.
Lie to me
Tell me everything is okay
Lie to me
Open my eyes to a perfect world.
Make it like
The pain was never there.
Abusive scars just disappear.
Make me feel human
Tell me something I want to hear
Cause right now I can’t survive.
Pretend to love me
Pretend to know me
Give me a friend
Give me a lover.
Give me one more reason to live.
The gun
Is awful close
I can taste
The copper against my tongue.
I can’t breathe
Are you listening?
If I say
‘’I love you”,
Would you stay?
I know I am ugly, I am garbage
Which is why I need just one friend.
Tell me everything is okay.
Make me feel again.
Please revive my soul.
I don’t care
If what you say is true
I just need to hear it.
Been so alone
I can hear the world mocking me.
Night after night
Day after day
Depression holds me at ransom
Taking all the joy I ever knew.
Romanticize me,
My life depends on it,
*My life depends on it

a bowl-shaped hollow
greystone pool amongst boulders
songbirds bathe and sing


words in the wind