i want to take away their pain
cure it with a hug
make them realise
they deserve more than what they settle for
that they’d saved my life
but is that worth anything
and i would absorb their hurt
radiate my happy and bleed me cold

i hate the way my thighs rub together
and the way i feel when people leave
and the rub in my soul
with no reprieve

can they see the ghosts in the gaps between each blink
in the space in which they’ve claimed their own ?

do you like me (yes)
do you want to be talking to me (not anymore)
is it too much (yes)
am i too much (yes)
am i enough (no)
where is this going (to end)
what do you want (he doesn’t know, except not me)
will you hurt me (yes)
is there someone else (there will be)
do you like me (he did)
do you want me (not enough, not anymore)

God gives and God takes. Usually takes. God gives and takes and gives back and takes back. God forgive me my unfairness
“It’s not the end of the world if we break up.”
God, I hope he’s right

He struggles to be with me
I am a struggle to be with
He chose not to struggle

Why do we feel? How do I stop?

Why do we not take away the pain
But then those in pain cannot
And pain for purpose to warn
But what if the harm is only the pain itself
If what is bad is only that it hurts?
It wouldn’t matter that he doesn’t love me if it didn’t hurt
I don't know what love is anymore,
So I drink
Pretty alcoholism for the ache

Strength? Or masochism
Sacrifice? Or emptiness