It hurts like a burn
Makes my stomach churn
I want to put a gun to my chest
Suicide? No one would have guessed
My heart is always pounding
The pain, it's astounding
Why can't I just take those pills?
Thoughts like these give me chills
I hope the end is coming
I could use the numbing

I want to own a big, lovely house
Own beautiful, expensive things
I want to live by myself
And I want to cry myself to sleep
That sounds quite romantic to me

I've taken the "best" out of your name
For that is a title you have no claim
This one-sided friendship gets harder to like
Just waiting on 3, your final strike
You are never there when I'm at my worst
Then you get upset when the rolls are reversed
One by one you'll lose all your friends
When you treat them this way that's how it ends
I knew you were selfish from the beginning
I took a chance but my patience is thinning
We had a good run for a couple of years
Although I saw it coming the pain still sears

Halt!
Rewind,
to before you opened the vault
Can't you see that it wasn't my fault?

I know it's silly of me to wish back that time
But don't you see it wasn't my crime?

I'm the one at fault you claim
I'm the one to blame
I'm the one you had to frame
Do you think it was all just a game?
Because I don't,
but I'm the one with the shame

I'm Feeling
The want to disappear
I'm dealing
With the person in the mirror
I'm hurting
The pain is everywhere
I'm crying
Tears I cannot share
I'm lying
Curled up on the floor
I'm trying
But I don't want to anymore

It's a story that no one wants to hear
Because it pulls ******* the heart strings
And it was hard
Very hard to see her go
Just laying there, eyes open, lifeless
That awkward position
Sometimes she laid like that
And I would wait for her to breathe
Wait to see her little chest expand and then compress once more
I would hold my own breath waiting
Scared that she might not be breathing
She was old and it was time
But the decision was hard
Some days she seemed alright but others she was a mess
But we finally let her go
It was hard to see her go

It's been a while since I've been this depressed
It hurts much worse than I remember

I am slipping at the seam
Walking on a balance beam
Lord, lead me in the right way
Light my path throughout the day
Do not let me fall behind
Not all these people are kind
Please stay forever by my side
Be my own personal guide
God, I always need you here
Being alone, that's my fear
Promise that with me you'll stay
That you'll make everything okay

Stomach like ice
Heart of stone
I can't suffice
I feel so alone
Fighting back tears
My emotions grow
Thinking about fears
I'm at my low