why does it feel like i'm falling
in a bottomless pit
in an everlasting nightmare

wincing at the thought
of other love affairs
though i tell myself
to not mind the tears

my love forbidden
looked down upon
for a million reasons
now crying at the brink of dawn

losing my words
when you show affection
to not i but
with whom you feel a connection

saying i ratify
yet inside i try
to convince myself
that i'm your ally

read between the lines
renaissance finally blooms
gaining new substantiality
the heart always confines
life itself finally resumes
blooming into abnormality

I have no patience for ignorance
and no heart for the entitled
no mercy for hypocrisy
and no tolerance for contemptuous people

knives keep on stabbing
and stabbing
I cannot see where they're coming from
I didn't realize they were even in my back
until I started complaining

how nice to find a knife
with the fingerprints
of someone you trusted
then they let out all your secrets
and my pain was revealed, oh what a tragedy

now I must fend for myself
from every negligent friend
hoping it'll all be over soon
but they keep on stabbing

only really caring
about what they think
because of what they have
in their pockets

none of them could care
less
and you can tell by
the way they talk

loving the attention
that you give me
finally being able
to fantasize
without the feeling
of superiority and dominance
innocence
and loss of ****** thoughts

when I say I'm tired,
it doesn't mean I'm sleep-deprived
I'm just tired of never waking up from this nightmare

drowning in roses
and all these blouses
of tasteless men
thinking of you every now and then

I know you don't mean it
but it still burns
like you put a cigarette
to my heart
and left it there for hours

when we have our fallouts
I've always had my doubts
wanting you to retrace your steps
so I could see what would happen next

I haven't cried
even though I tried
when you dismissed my feelings
you left me there, staring at ceilings

I don't feel sorry for my heart
it was you, who drifted us apart
making assumptions at my expense
while you made everything tense

wanting you to finally come back
returning with all the things you lack
now I see you for who you truly are
you permanently left time with a scar

please, don't come back
you won't get a plaque
you won't get brownie points
because we've got no joints

taking the words right out my mouth
stealing my style and patterns
appropriating my thoughts and ideas
for your own use

you're so stale and instinctive
you have to take all my creativity
all the energy that I've put
into even living, and you've yet to take my last breath

crediting you as my savior
like you did me a favor
turning into spite
causing so much smite
dying within the walls
where we once had our calls

would it be a waste
if i still chased
when there's always a dullness
hidden in the truthfulness
when your feelings have faded
and i'm completely jaded

tired of this sophistry

missing for six months
crying every night
now that feeling is gone
and nothing will ever make it alright

wanting him to come home
whimpering for hours at a time
seeking for everyone's attention
because he never came back at nighttime

it all washes over
the way it never ends
constantly thinking about it
it's hard to always pretend

separated by distance
separated by my lack of courage
trying to make my love obvious
yet I cannot stop being so obnoxious

I remember looking upon the water
feeling the ripples through my fingers
almost falling asleep
to the sorrowful wind

now I cannot fathom the thought
of being anywhere alone
anywhere that you aren't
falling asleep on your shoulder

my heart is a ticking time bomb
as every love makes it ache

every heartbreak takes a piece off my heart
until it'll completely explode