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Josh Allen Jan 2015
today is just really ****** and i wish i wasn't alive to feel it
Josh Allen Jan 2015
16 and 1/2 with a sadness as deep as the ocean
which you can feel yourself being dragged into slowly by the claws of depression as you attempt to escape but have found yourself in an abyss of emptiness.
Josh Allen Jan 2015
my body is sober
and yours is not
my lungs aren't dead yet
but yours are close
will i ever see you again
yeah, probably not
did i ever love you?
i don't think so

we've trashed the house and now we've trashed our lives

we threw a tv out the window
left the trash can piled up
2 strangers
are sleeping on my couch
there's broken beer bottles on the top of my roof
and now there's a broken heart inside my chest
Josh Allen Jan 2015
Old Gray: My Life With You, My Life Without You
Tigers Jaw: Teen Rocket
The World Is A Beautiful Place: Heartbeat In The Brain
The Story So Far: Navy Blue
Counterparts: Decay
Foxing: Inuit
Karen O: The Moon Song
Have Mercy: Living Dead
Modern Baseball: Pothole
Moose Blood: Gum
The Wonder Years: Madelyn

...and we'll kiss and laugh and talk about how we're just small specks of dust in the universe wondering what our purpose is.
Josh Allen Jan 2015
ok
i may look like i'm something on the outside,  but deep down inside i'm absolutely nothing

i'm unfortunately not worth it and i never will be.
  Jan 2015 Josh Allen
Heidi Mason
my mind is blank
like a canvas brand new

writers block at its finest
who the hell knows what I can say

my mind is a blank slate
that is able to make beautiful work

I'm a firework that hasn't been lit
and there's no one around to light it.

I'm stuck.
  Jan 2015 Josh Allen
Heidi Mason
suicide
su•i•cide- the act of one killing themselves intentionally.

a way to tell God that you can't live on the world he created

a solution that last forever when the problem lasted the weekend

the way to show everyone you're ******* done with every lie that comes out of their mouth.

even after knowing all these ******* pointless facts about it

I could easily
take the blade to my neck
and drown myself in my own blood

I'm so ******* sick
mentally and physically

I can't figure out
why I want to die
but I know it always sounds right

I don't know
how people would react if I die
but I sure do know
they'd be just fine

I'm just a lonely
waste of space
on this earth
no im not gonna **** myself
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