Jessy

Mar 2018

Simoné

It took me seven years
to realise
the words in my mind
were too deep for
my mouth to dig up
I thought it was easier
to open my skin
and let the truth
pour down my arms

It took me seven years
to realise
nobody should be allowed
to touch parts
of your home
or hold pieces
of your heart
that you don't yet understand

It took me seven years
to realise
I will wear these scars
forever
I'll carry them
through every smile
every kiss
every concerned gaze
I'll carry them
to my grave

It took me seven years
to realise
the pain carved
into the walls
of my castle
etchings of
attempting to disappear
are not a story of weakness
but a tale of
how I survived

#truth #pain #acceptance #forever #heart

Jessy Mar 2018

thunderstorms

I find peace in the rain
I find comfort in the lightning
I find relaxation in the thunder
The storm holds me tight
The humidity keeps me warm
The weather doesn’t let go

I feel at home
When there’s a thunderstorm
Because the weather mimics
What goes on in my head

#depression #suicide #rain #thunder #lightning #thunderstorm #storm

Jessy Mar 2018

An opportunity to die

At this very moment,
I’m not suicidal.
But if a car came
While I was crossing the street
I wouldn’t move out of the way.
If someone was holding a gun to my head
I wouldn’t exactly beg for my life.
In fact, I would tell them
To go for it.
No, I’m not suicidal.
But if I had an opportunity
To die without killing myself,
I would take it.

saw something similar on Pinterest so I decided to recreate it

#suicide #death #depression

Jessy Mar 2018

when did it all happen?

It’s the little things
That go unnoticed first.

I didn’t notice when
My dad got a haircut
My mom got new glasses?
I didn’t notice.
My friend bought a new dress.
Oh, I didn’t even realize.

But then the little things
Become bigger things.

My brother got a new car.
My sister got engaged.
My boyfriend switched schools.

And then they become
Really big things.

My dad had an affair.
My mom filed for divorce.
My best friend moved across the world.
My brother got put in prison.
My sister didn’t invite me to the wedding.
My boyfriend left me for someone else.

And quickly
My life is in ruins
Lying like a broken city
Scattered all over the ground
And I didn’t even notice
When all of this happened

Everything fell apart
Right in front of my eyes
And I didn't even notice.

#depression #sadness #family