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jenn Jan 2018
Its 3:26 am. The house sits still, dark, but warm as the blizzard rages outside the bay window. You can hear the faint pops as Movement’s Feel Something spins quietly in the corner of the room… I woke up this morning missing you more than I usually do. My stomach’s been in knots since the day I left to come back home, and I know it sounds stupid, but since I can’t call you, I find myself replaying the sound of your voice in my head. I don’t want to forget what it sounds like.

They told me that I was never allowed to fall in love. That if I were to find such love I’d be sent away and forgotten about, as if I was just some piece of trash. They made life as I knew it a lonely existence. But something happened when I met you… and those late nights we spent talking, the time that we shared together, love snuck up on us. I fell in love with the way that you looked at me, the way you held my hand, and the way I smiled the night of our first kiss. I knew it was love because for the first time ever, I was willing to risk the security of my own home to be with you. This modern day forbidden love is anything but romantic, but it’s these late nights text conversations, and planning our secret meetings that make the time that we spend away from each other worth it. As cheesy as it sounds, I cannot wait until the day we don’t have to hide our love. I wanna show the world how happy you make me. Until then, I’ll see you soon.

Te amo
Jenn
jenn Nov 2017
I don’t think we were ever supposed to be a thing.
That we were never meant to be more than just strangers…
but something happened.
I don’t know what though.
Perhaps this is just an illusion,
one that I can’t seem to pull myself out of.
That those nights filled with laughter and deep conversations
until the clock reads two… is solely just a picture scribbled
inside my head.
But even then, somehow you still seem to know
me better than I know myself.

How did we find ourselves here?
How did I become so lucky to break down
those walls you’ve worked so hard to build?
How did I find a guy who looks past all of the things
I try to hide from myself?
More than friends yet not technically lovers,
our story is a forgotten fairy tale—
with meaning that has been lost in translation.
Perhaps maybe one day, we can break out
our old notebooks and ink pens
and begin to write our own.
jenn Nov 2017
And when puddles ripple from the slightest touch of a raindrop that has fallen from the overcast sky, and the pine needles droop from the weight of water as if the world was equivalent to one hundred pound cinder blocks, please remember that somewhere within the rolling Catskills, your palace still sits. The aroma of blended spices will swallow the surrounding oxygen it feeds on, mixing together to find combination, to form a perfect harmony, before finally sprinting up the chimney to dance in the air, as if it were sending out a distress signal, leading you home. Remember that after the katalox clicks tight, and your shoes sleep on the mat, all that will really matter are the lessons of kindergarten. To be kind to one another and share, to know when you need to say sorry, to love and care for each other. However, some of the easiest lessons are the hardest to show. So one thing that I have come to teach myself is that sometimes the best apologies are those that taste like love. So, if I were to become that block of dry ice that burns you even with the most gentle touch, tell me. I will invite you to dine at the table, and I will melt with the heat of the stove and pray that you see not just a meal but a feast baked in my apologies and garnished with all the love that I don’t know how to physically express. The type that you can feel rush down your throat, racing through your veins to warm everything from the roots of your hair to the tip of your toe. So, if I haven't said it enough times,  I want you to know: quiero amarte, pentru ca te iubesc, and in every language ever created, I need you to know that I love you. And thus it is this love that has created something much more than just a diverse palate, it is something that has created it’s own embrace. One that humans can’t provide.

— The End —