I was heartbroken in San Francisco
But it wasn’t San Francisco’s fault
I had been abandoned
And I don’t think I’m being dramatic when I say,
left for dead

Isn’t that how you always feel?
When someone you love abandons you?
Like they wouldn’t care if you died
It’s not their business to care anymore
That’s the beauty in leaving
And the travesty

So I walked up the winding hills
And I took in the beautiful Bay Area
And I stared out at Alcatraz
And I walked along the Golden Gate Bridge
And when I asked my best friend,
How many people do you think have jumped off this bridge?
She said, let’s go home

We took a ferry to Sausalito one day
Where it was just as beautiful
We ordered tacos and margaritas
I couldn’t eat the tacos
I couldn’t eat anything
I was on the heartbreak diet

I tried to mask it,
Lord knows I failed
But I tried

I went to every gay bar I could find
I covered my face in makeup trying to mask the misery
I blasted the happiest song I could think of,
Which was Love Shack, by the B52s
I met a preschool teacher,
She offered me ******* in the bathroom of some bar
I don’t do drugs, but sometimes
You have nothing to lose

When I leave California, I told myself,
I will leave heartbreak behind
I will leave my heart in San Francisco, if you will
But that didn’t work out too well

Because when I got home, it was everywhere
It was in the walls, it was the smell of my own sheets
It was his leftover cigarette butts on my balcony
It was the flannels he bought me
Because I was always shivering at night
And his lighters in my coat pocket
Even the slight slant of my apartment’s floor
That he would always complain about
It wasn’t San Francisco, it was anywhere

When you can't see
It's hard to step out
Difficult to look in
Impossible to really listen

When you can't see
It's easy to get trapped
Simple to get caught up
Human nature to hide inside

When you can't see
There is no other option
No solution either
It's this and here, nothing more

When you can't see
No resolution will fit
Nobody's understanding is kind
And not a soul can know that
It's only you
And you've gone blind

You told me to hold your heart,
So I took it and let it lull me to sleep.
I felt the beat
And knew it was for me
And it made me
Happy.

You told me to hold your heart,
So I took it and wore it on my sleeve.
I displayed it
For the world to see
And it made me
Happy.

You told me to hold your heart,
But what you didn't know is I asked so, too.
You didn't take it
You didn't display it
And I thought I was
Happy

I found my heart,
So I took it and put it back together.
But it wasn't the same.
It was never the same.
And I knew I wasn't
Happy

But still I held my heart,
And I still wore it on my sleeve.
Beaten and broken
For the world to see
And I have found how to be
Happy.

To you my love
Please know what this means
That i love you with every piece of my being
you are my heart
My one and only
My everything
To you my love
I need you forever
And that will be our always
And i know now that we were always meant to be
Love you now
And forever
To you my love.

I danced around the tables,
Sang songs in the steamy showers,
I told my reckless fables,
And I repeat it hour after hours.

I am finally hitting a stride of joy,
As though my sadness and concern,
Vanished to never return,
I am finally happy.

I'll never be top choice
Never be number one
I won't be the most desired
But that's never what I wanted
I don't need everyone to love me
Or pick me first
I just wanted you to
Only you
And I thought maybe just maybe
But now I know the truth
I'll always be no one's favorite

Like flowers,
You start to bloom again
everytime it's spring

And now,
Spring has come.
I love you
I love you still
I love you always

I remember I've dreamt of you before,
And I have loved you; from your outer layers to your very core

Your dreams, your frustrations, your fears
What makes you happy and what wets your eyes with tears?

Everything, I wanted to know it all,
Before I even knew I was going to fall