"But you told me you just wanted to be friends"
I said sitting in his front seat confused
A half-empty bottle of Fireball sitting in my lap
His Soundcloud playlist ringing in my ears
"Friends can still have fun"
His words went around in my head
Again and again and again
He gave me more propositions
Until my dazed mind made it sound good
"Let me just finish my drink"
I look at the quarter bottle with nothing left to lose
Up to my mouth, it goes
Chug chug chug
He reaches over and pushes it towards the sky
Up up up
It's more than I can handle
But I cant give up now
I don't
We climb into the backseat
I'm a complete mess
Three times
Three times I hang out of the car to puke
Puke the drink he made me drink
Its been a month now
And he's not in my life
But here he is dragging me back into his
He's telling my school, his friends
That I ***** him
I got him drunk
And I ***** him
But hey
If that's what friends do

i've worn glasses for as long as i can remember
i can't remember the day i got my first pair
hell i don't even remember what having normal vision is like
if i even had it
depression is a lot like that
once you have it
you don't really remember what its like to not have it
i may not have had it my whole life
yet it sure feels like forever
but thats a thing i've adjusted to
like my eyesight
with a new pair of lenses

time seems to go by slow when you wish it wouldn't, and races when you want the moment to last

when you're with them take a step back and ask yourself "is there absolutely anywhere else i would want to be right now?"

why is it some people will try so **** hard to drag you down to their level of happiness, when they could be working on getting on your level of happiness

i don't know what the future holds, all i know is that i want to hold you in the future

addiction is real
you hear about it
you see it
but do you understand it?
it's all in your head
you get a substance
over and over
day after day
and then when it's gone
you find you need it
but what if it happens
in other parts of your body?
what about your heart?
what about with
not a substance
but another human being
isn't it then so much
more complicated?
because this is another
living
breathing
human being
for whatever reason
they are no longer
a part of your daily ritual
i apologize
because nobody
nobody.
deserves to be addicted
when they didn't ask to be