"What's wrong with me?"
I sit down and wonder, legs propped on my bed.
A million thoughts rush forward and back in my spinning head.
Questions with a deep background, or so other people may think,
I beat around the bush and back, without a second blink.
Should I focus on me, be selfish and vain?
But what about the strife in the world, the ****** and pain?
Living your life in your head is not an easy task,
Live life in the moment just to make it last?
I don't know what to say or to do,
I'm confused about who to listen to.
Who's right, the young or the old?
The books, the stories, the memories that unfold?
My mind, my focus, it's honestly distraught.
I'll do what feels right, and stay away from what's not.
I'm alone, and I'm scared. What matters anymore,
grades and studies, or fun and friends?
The stress that kills me and brings me down,
WHO KNOWS WHEN IT'LL END?
I have goals, no other way to put it.
But why do I bring myself down and simply quit it?
That motivation and drive, it's lost somewhere..
I need it. Grasp it. Keep it. Never let it go.
What do I do, feeling this way?
I don't even know what I need anymore.
I need understanding and relation of heart,
I'm confused and annoyed, where do I start?
I miss the days when lying on the grass
in the backyard was a beautiful time.
Whatever is wrong with me, whatever is faulty,
I am in control of it. I know it. But sometimes I feel it slipping away..
Lists and lists in my mind,
it's always shaking and spinning, on rewind.
So help me God, to help myself.
Breath in and out, you'll make it out.