If I were asked to describe you. I would use every superlative I ever knew. I would describe your eyes as a universe that is so vast and beautiful that I could look at them for years to come.

If I were asked to paint you. I would use colors no one ever knows before because no colors on this earth is enough for you. I would use brushed that are just millimeters thin because you are so delicate and I would hate to ruin it.

If I were asked to put you to words. Nothing that I could write will ever be enough to describe you. No amount of letters could be enough to encapsulate you. Nothing that my shaky hands could ever do you justice.

When I know you. When I see you. When I finally know how you sounded like. I'm certain that the universe spent a lot more time in creating you. And I'm thankful that it did

Yang kulihat adalah senja,
tapi yang kurasa adalah sendu.

I love you because I do.

I fell for you back when the only thing I saw of you is your beautiful pair of eyes. I fell for you slowly, because love, at first sight, is nothing but lust. I fell for you during our midnight chats and calls. I fell for you because you were there when no one else was. I fell for you because you opened up your walls for me when you never opened them for anyone else.

I am but a speck of dust, orbiting you--the center of my universe. Pulling me closer with every moment we're together. But even a universe metaphor couldn't describe your heavenly figure. Because no constellation can make a beautiful sight as you are.

I am yours. Your humble servant. Your devotee. Your worshipper. Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.

I love you and everything about you. Your gleaming eyes. Your charm. Your beauty. Your mess. Your highest and lowest, though to me you will always be Your Highness.

I love you because you're you. And I love you because I do.

Tidak ada yang namanya "harapan palsu",
hanya kamu yang menaruh harapan tinggi kepada seseorang yang salah

Apa yang dimulai dengan baik-baik,
maka sebaiknya diakhiri juga dengan baik-baik.

I hope you know that him not wanting to be with you is not because you're unlovable, undeserving, undesirable or undateable.

Please do not let one man, or any of them, ever leave you feeling that their inability to love you in the way you want, need and deserve means that you will never find the romance you're after.

Sometimes, and of course, he will never admit this but, you scare him most beautifully. He's scared because he knows that you're the real deal, and maybe, right now, that's not what he wants.

You don't want to be with a man who has to lose you to finally wake up to himself and realize you are in fact what he wants, or, on top of that, a man who wouldn't even care if he never hears from you again.

The cruelest thing he can do is be afraid of you and your love, but leave you in the dark and questioning everything you are and everything you're worth because of his uncertainty.

We grow attached quickly, we get our hopes up when deep down we know we shouldn't, we hope that they'll want us in the same way we want them and we make them our everything.

When things don't work out, we end up wondering why we're not enough and why it is that the ones we always seem to want never want us back. we take it to mean that no man could ever love us for us.

If only we could realize that the person we're chasing after isn't the one for us. I'd like to think the one who is, is the one who will consciously choose us every day and there will be none of this wondering and wait for nonsense with them.

The one for us will fill us up with so much love that we'll never feel that we'd need to change for him or that we could never be the only woman he acknowledges and adores.

Please take a moment to accept that no matter how much you care for him, how much you want him in your life and how much you want him to want you, it doesn't mean that he's the one for you.

He may be the one you desire, but is he the one you deserve? You deserve someone who will realize how pure your heart is and how much you're willing to do for them and would never dream of risking or losing that.

You may think he's the guy of your dreams and he ticks all the boxes, he's the one you' be proud to show off to the world, he's the one you will never be able to find again, but is he really all of those things and as dreamy as you make him out to be when he treats you the way he does?

You don't deserve the guy who is inconsistent and indecisive. The guy who is sending you mixed signals. The guy who is endlessly coming up with excuses. The guy who makes promises he can't keep. The guy who keeps letting you down.

Remind yourself that him not wanting to be with you means that the love of your life is still out there and if it means you had to meet him and have your heart broken and your spirits crushed to realize that, then at least you can walk away with a clearer idea of what you do what in relationship.

Letting go of him and the hopes you built up in your mind will be hard, but you need to pinpoint when someone is taking you for a fool and for granted and to know that you're destined for more than that. The love you want is out there, don't let him make you believe it isn't

Believe in true love even though you feel so far away from it or it seems impossible that it exists. Don't let these men play with your heart and your feelings to the point where heartbreak and hurt are all you begin to except people.

Maybe he's looking for something or someone else, and that's perfectly fine because who says he's the only person in this world you but you? Who says that he should be all you know when there's a bigger world out there beyond him that you refuse to see and explore?

You know what you have to offer, you know that when you love,  you love fully and unapologetically, you know that one day you can make a man really happy and that you have a heart that’ll never turn cold no matter how broken it is, so don’t let these men dishearten and discourage you.

Don’t let them change or crush you just because they weren’t looking for something deep, real and meaningful as you are. The attraction and connection you had with him is something I promise you, you can and will find in someone else.

Keep in mind that some people have no shame or regret in breaking other people’s hearts for their selfish reasons, and not because they’re the perfect catch or confident but because they need an ego boost and someone to make them feel less lonely until someone else comes along.

Some people lose out on beautiful things, experiences and people all because they don’t seek, or are incapable, of building a true connection with it and instead, see it as something temporarily fulfilling rather than everlastingly enriching or enough for them.

He isn’t one of a kind, he’s just the kind of guy you thought you had to be with and your heart truly desired at one point in time.

You’re not just letting go of him, you’re letting go of everything you imagined he was and everything you saw in him that you felt you needed, but you’re well and truly better off without.

Let’s hope he one day finds what he’s looking for when he’s finally ready because we both know you’ll find it one day eventually and when you think of him, it won’t hurt as much as it does now.

Believe that your ability to love and feel deeply will one day be appreciated rather than taken advantage of

Sepenggal kata "hai" mampu mengurungkan niatku untuk mundur.

I wrote this while thinking about you. I want to write something that could describe you, that would perfectly describe you. But, nothing I'll ever write will do you justice. Nothing this shaky hand could type would be enough.

You have the whole milky way in your eyes. You have the universe embedded in those pretty eyes. Something people could only dream of A constellations of stars, rainbows, and everything pretty in this world.

You are a masterpiece. The kind that took center stage in everywhere you walk into. You are a walking painting. Even in an art exhibition, you'll beat the beauty of every single thing in them.

Universe took a lot more time in creating you. Painting those smiles. Stroke by stroke. You have the warmth of a soft hugs and everything nice showing through those smiles and I, for one, are lucky to be able to witness it.

Even after all of that, these writings will never quite do you justice. Nothing I could ever write will.

Reaching out but can't reach you,
and now I just feel blue,
not having any clue,
how to get into your queue.

You're still my favorite view,
and I still don't know how to make a breakthrough.

Can this feeling undo?
****, it has overflown.

Reaching out but can't reach you,
I hope this feeling would discontinue.

After I was born in this world
I live in loneliness
I have a parent but I don’t feel having them
It’s because they don’t have much time with me
Their time is only for the work, work, and work
I live in a big house, luxurious, and have a lot of expensive toys
But all I feel is nothingness.



- Just a little girl who always felt the emptiness

Someone once said to me that I might be not charming for the first time, but you'll get it by the time. He--my ex--also said that it would be hard for someone to get over me once that people 'got it'.

But, you know what? The thing that has been happening is, once someone got it, it would be the time when we were too close to be something else and that person would be terrified to take any more steps.

I've been someone who's way too 'precious' to those people but would get abandoned too, anytime.

Fuxx the logic about 'we wouldn't be the same anymore if we took any more steps'. Because we took it or not, people changes.

And we would likely to regret something that we haven't done it rather than what we've done. So, don't think too much because losing will be happening.

I'm afraid of happiness. Because I know after every high there are always lows. I'm scared of whatever comes after the rainbows. I'm scared of days like these. Days where I woke up feeling okay, feeling good because I finally almost pieced myself back up together. And boom, the sky falls upon me and I'm back to pieces.

I'm content with sadness. Because when you're sad, you knew how things are gonna go. You know how you going to feel for the day. I found comfort in sadness simply because I knew I couldn't go down any more. I knew I'm broken, and I knew where they are. I found peace in them.

—but now, everything is ruined, again.

Hi, everyone.
Let me introduction myself to you.
So, My name is Nadya, I'm 18 years old, and hopefully I'm still alive.
I studied at a private university in Indonesia majoring in accounting information systems.

Thank you for reading my writing

I'm tired, but I had enough sleep last night. I've had my coffee multiple times today. It's something deeper, something much harder to heal. Something that won't be solved by a good night's sleep or a cup of coffee. It's something that I couldn't help.

I'm tired, but not physically. I'm doing well physically, but I'm tired mentally. I'm tired of life. Of the universe that never stopped throwing me curveballs. That won't let me take a timeout.

It's gotten worse lately. My own body aches now. Every fiber, every tendon, every inch of my muscles all aches. It's getting hard to wake up. It's getting dark. I could feel darkness swallowing every inch of my sanity that is left. I could hear the thunderous silence coming soon.

I could feel darkness's arms slowly wrapping over me. I could hear it's a whisper, louder by each waking day. It's getting harder to walk, as every step became heavier and heavier. I could feel its coldness slowly creeping in.

This is it. This is where the light ends.

Some people say the sunset is the best view.
But for me, you are the best view!

What started well,
then it should also end well.

If no one teaches you to stop looking,
then let me be a lesson to you that those who seek must know when to stop.
If no one teaches you to respect every presence,
then let me be a lesson for you that wasting your presence only adds to the loss.
If no one teaches you to fight,
then let me be a lesson for you that struggle is never easy.
If no one teaches you to keep promises,
then let me be the promised lesson not just calm words.
If no one teaches you to make the most of the opportunity,
then let me be a lesson that not all opportunities come twice.
If no one teaches you,
then let me, even though the word "we"
will only be regrets and lessons

--From me, your biggest regret and lesson. Hopefully, everything is enough.

Hi Samuel,
it's me, your best friend.
you still remember me right?
I hope you still remember me.

it's been 2 years, since that incident.
the incident that makes me lose my best friend, you.

how are you in heaven there?
I hope you're fine there.

I'm fine here.
so don't worry about me.

This is not about you who took my heart out of my chest and then it to the ground. This is not about ou who I told my nightmares, and proceeded to make it all come true.

This is not about you who blamed me for everything.

This is not about you. You whom I cared with all of me. You who left as soon as you found someone else

Hi,

it's been a month since you left me for no reason.
maybe what we've been through for the past 3 months has no meaning for you.
but for me, this is very meaningful.
Did you remember when you pick me up? when we go to the cinema? and when you come to my place?
this makes me very happy.
thank you for being in my life and leaving me with a million questions in my mind and a million insecurities for me

I know people come and go, this is life.
But it seems I forgot the fact that you are the same as those who came but not to stay.

Thank you & I'm a mess now.

I don't want to stay away,
but you pushed me away.

Hi, Human,

Finally, I have time for writing again!!
after all this year I've been busy with my Final Project and college stuff.

well, I don't want to expect that you all miss me. But, I hope you guys miss me...

Since you decided to leave.
From that moment I decided to close the door of my heart to you.
I do not forbid you to go.
But please,
don't come back if, in the end, you choose to leave again.
Because I'm already tired.
My fault for accepting you with pleasure.
As if forgetting the fact that you could have left me as if we had never met.
You started it,
you end it too.
Without saying goodbye.

After I was born in this world
I live in loneliness
I have a parent but I don’t feel having them
It’s because they don’t have much time with me
Their time is only for the work, work, and work
I live in a big house, luxurious, and have a lot of expensive toys
But all I feel is nothingness.



- Just a little girl who always felt the emptiness

The sunset is proof that the end can also be beautiful.

but that only applies to the sunset not to our relationship

To be honest, I have greatly improved this year. Old wounds left by people who used to swear never to leave. By an incident where I was left alone, again. By some who have stopped by. With several lessons taught by the universe.

However, there are still some wounds that I still can't close. Because I have lived in those wounds for a long time. I know all the parts. I was too familiar with all the pain. So, without me knowing, I was comfortable in the wound. I'm trying to close it all. But not infrequently I also ran towards them.

My journey isn't finished yet. I promise to stop visiting the wound. I promise to start a new story this year. Starting again to establish a sense of fellow human beings. Re-start believing the universe and everything in it. Starting over allows yourself to be embraced by happiness even though you know that sadness will come by afterward.

I still have a long way to go. After everything that has happened to me, all the sad stories are endless. All my night tears that often replace sleep. All dreams are broken by logic. My aim is still the same. I want to be happy.