i hate you, but yet i love you
you bring me joy, but still fill me with sorrow
your presence brightens my day, but still darkens my sky
i love you more than words can say
you'll always be the highlight of my darkened days.
but when you leave so does the happiness.
the demons start to whisper
the stairs begin to creek
i begin to pop the pills
maybe those will be filled with joy.
the blades start to appear
the blood begins to drip.
maybe this will be my one-way ticket trip.
and always remember, if you don't see me again
you will always be my one true friend

passionate kisses
a warm embrace
smooth skin
the touching of the face.
this is now just a **** memory.
but it's as close as ill ever be.
every detail of your face is engraved into my mind.
your full lips
your nice hips
and the smile that never goes away.

Not a flinch
Nor a word screamed
But the red stained carpet,
Matches the covered wrist

Blade thinning
Blood thickens
Deep breath and slight sigh

Blunt.
Sharp.
Neither will stop the urge
Nor will the screams for help

Scars heal
Memories dont
Memories wont...

short black dress
heels higher than my self esteem
burgandy lipstick
bronzed skin
running mascara
ruined eyeliner
cracked nails......
that turned ugly didnt it.
this is our relationship.
at first it is disguised as beauty and lust
but on the inside it's ugly.
abusive....
shattered mirrors
broken dishes
smeared blood on the floor leading to the bedroom.
no more hiding an ugly face behind a beautiful mask.

I like to imagine flowers dying.
it explains to me that even if we were all beautiful and perfect, we would still wither and die

DEMONS
DEMONS
I feel like I can hear them
but they are not whispering.
the screams are peircing my ears during the middle of the stone cold night.
their faces are horrific
but they have pretty smiles.
theyre quite big, yet they walk for miles.
I know they walk because im followed everywhere I go.
I act like theyre not there and play pretend.
the funny thing is I used to call these demons friends.

hangman is a game we all used to play
but do we know the real meaning of the game?
some words will hurt
some will be the trigger to the gun
some with be the knot thats tied in the rope
some will be the sharp edge of the blade
and some will be the death of me