I have the table arranged perfectly, with two lit candles.
I’m wearing a long beautiful blue dress, it’s his favorite color.
The dinner is ready, I decide to sit at the table and wait.
I wait for hours; the food is cold.
He isn’t coming home, it’s just me at this table.
I knew he wouldn’t, he’s been dead for 3 years.
It’s my birthday though, we always had dinner together on my birthday.
I miss him.

Love.
A universal voice that echoes through the source of time.
A feeling of warmth as it wraps those familiar arms around you.
A tingling feeling that resonates on your lips when it kisses you.

Heartbreak.
Betrayed, dismayed, and terrorized was what it left you feeling.
Bittersweet but traumatised by the memories that were long gone.
Because of you, I have realised that love can either make or break you.

Time.
Coming of age was what love did for everyone.
Calling your name through my lips did not leave a sting anymore.
Creating a whole new identity was what love was.

Love changes you.
For better or for worse.

I said it before.
But i didnt explain.
The complexity of my words.
What did i say?
"My tears are like knives
And im crying all over my body
Ive got scars all over"
See i wasnt lying.
My cheeks look like a cuttingboard.
Each time my body gets cut open
My blood runs black.
It oozes through my veins, and out to the ground.
I am not to be understood.
Like one runs into a train
The roads so similiar
But wind up here,
On this one tear.
These tears that cut,
Are like unopenable doors that shut.
The wind up closes,
As my final thoughts choose to vanish.
These tears
These knives
Prove often to be poetic
Because i often write about the scars.
I often write about my pain
but my silence echoes.
Bouncing
Bouncin
Bounci
Bounc
Boun
Bou
Bo
B.
*silence

popularity is so overrated

Im waiting for the sting.
For the gunshot that ends me.
Im waiting for you to give up on me.
Im scared that
In the midst of my happieness
You will come forth and mention your upmost sadness.
Im afraid you are gonna hurt me
(yes, guys get hurt and remember it too)
Im waiting for you to realize what a ****** i am.
I wait for the day you find someone better.
And though you tell me im the one,
I still have nightmares of abandonment.
Its not your fault.
Maybe i should just believe in love,
in you
But im scared
Cause ive put my faith in places before,
*and was met with overwhelmong dissapointment

We have always been building up to this point
*you had to know it was coming

In so many ways
i was counting on you
Like the last draw of a card,
i needed you to be the one
But,
As all things do
You passed on,
Your love went from me to the next
And you
Just left me to be forgotten.
I
Was counting on you
To be the one to end my loneliness.
And
For a short time you did.
But as all things do,
You passed on.
You went away,
Down the rabbit hole
To continue to feed your lustful nature.
You used to love on me.
you were a fire *******
But as all things do,
Yes
Yes
As all things do
You passed on.
I wasnt insane
Im not
Really!
Dont argue!!!!
Stop!
These voices
They tell me
As all things do,
You passed on.