Since I was little people told me monsters don't exist, grown ups invented them to keep little kids safe. What my parents told me was that monsters live under my bed or inside my closet and if I didn't go to sleep they were going to jump and scare the **** out of me, I never believed on them but right now I sincerely want that monsters were as my parents told me because compared to the ones we have inside our heads those monsters look like kids. I've always been a shy person, with few friends to play or talk I always thought that I was happy and I truly was but when my biggest enemy, the monster I am really scared of came I saw how my simple boring life became hell on earth. I tried to fight it by my own but after a year having to deal with this monster by myself I got tired and I gave up I think that was what he wanted since the beginning. That was when I started telling my friends how I felt and what they always said was that this was temporary and that in a couple of months I'll be fine, but you know what? that was a lie, the hope they gave me was like food for him because this hope made him bigger and stronger having now full control of my thoughts, now I'm just a puppet and he is my puppeteer, I'm just a game and he is playing me, I am under his control and I'm tired of it. Depression is the monster I fear the most but after all its the only one whose been at my side since the beginning. So now when people tell you monsters don't exist just remember monsters are hidden in your head and they are waiting for the right time to attack your thoughts and gain control of your body.

When you are struggling with depression every time you speak, breath or even blink there is one thought that will pop in your mind, "I want to **** myself" this thought is the one that over all is going to be with you from the beginning to the end. Please do me a favor, read it slowly and you will see the beauty of the world in one sentence because the fact that is only a thought and not an action shows how a place of opportunities is waiting for you. New countries to visit, New strangers to kiss. The future is a sea of new adventures waiting for a captain to sail them and the captain of your story is you, hold on this is temporary and you are not as alone as you think, I know that feeling that even your best friend is happier with someone else  that your family is going to be happier without you around is eating you alive, that's the worst feeling that a person can feel, to see all the people you love happier when you are not around and I know that is true because I feel the same but after all you need to remember: suicide may be the question but not the answer, depression is getting bigger every day but at a certain point you'll get a weapon, for me has been writing maybe for you singing or running but you will make it through. I don't know you I maybe I'll never will but if that thought is in your head and you are reading this that means that you are the bravest person on this planet and I'm a 100% sure you'll make it through. I believe in you, just give time some time to work for the beautiful ending it has prepare for you after all this suffering