Out of sight, out of mind
That's how it goes, it's so unkind
Won't someone spare some time
To see if I'm doing fine
No one calls
No one cares at all
They know what happened
They know I'm at the end
Guess I really don't have true friend
I'm well into the descend
Pile it up, stack it tall
See how steep I can climb before I fall
Flat on my face, already there
But look no one cares
There's nothing I can do for them
I was just their whim
**** THEM

I see my own reflection,
And feel the loathing from within.

The anticipation of relief,

Of the blade cutting in.


The steel is cold and sharp,

Against  my weary skin.

It slides through slowly,

And I savour the feeling that it brings.

How far shall I cut?

How deeply shall I go?

I see the vein pulsating before the blood begins to flow.
Should I cut a little deeper and have this journey end,
Or dance with the pain that has now become my friend.

I look at my self-hatred reflected in the blade.
The future is uncertain,
And the choice still remains.
Do I wait for tomorrow,
As it is another day,
To live with the pain,
Or let my soul soar away.

I've been down this road before, so ****** and cold
But on I go, thoughts running wildly uncontrolled
I just go home and silently close the door
When I can't take it any more
It's like deja vu
I'm so scared without a clue
Of how to stop the bleed
I'm so willing to concede
My mind plays tricks on me
So I set down and smoke some ****
It quites my mind
So I can find
A small space inside
Where my feelings can hide
Lock them up and toss the key
To the bottom of the black sea
It's where I long to be
Where I can't breath
Do the dead mans float
Cuz I can't cope
I need some dope
So I'm not found at the end of a rope
No one understands
No one can
To the bottom I sink again
This time I'm not even trying to swim

It's hard to sleep with clothes on again
It was so heavenly sleeping next to him
In tangled in his every limb

For all them days, time for us was at a stand
We would just sleep when we can
When you wasn't proving you was a passionate man

Our body's always moving in perfect rhythm
Multiple ******* was just a given
So intense, it made me confess my religion

Every primeval need meet
I begging for more,for the next
Our amazingly, sensual, causal ***!!!!!

Here comes the sun.
The puddles have dried from underneath my eyes,
And the storm-clouds evaporated from my mind.
In earnest, I call for jubilation!
Convalescence at last!
But then I remember.
My fitful feelings are simply on furlough.
This is only the eye of the storm.
Knowing this, I brace myself,
Hoping of mitigating my inert emotions.
In haste, I foist my harrowing memories,
Banishing them to far-away corners of the mind.
I defend my self-esteem,
Behind impregnable walls and menacing guards.
A shelter to ignite hope.
Inside, I feel valiant.
For once, I am strong.
Alas, it’s all to no avail.
My attempts quelling the insurrection will prove useless.
The enemy attacks from the inside.
And so with a sigh, I’ll wave my white flag.
My fortress will crumble.
Hope will no longer burn.
The storm will engulf me once more.