Before:
Let's do this.

During:
1. I am selfish, I say, sometimes.
2. Cake is not enough, I must have tea too.
3. Books pile up on the shelves still not plenty enough.
4. Its me, sitting on the porch
5. The waves, crashing in, but I'm not by the sea

After:
Let's never see each other again.

its overflowing,
its swelling,
to and fro the tide is moving,
and so does my heart.

When the daily struggle to:
1. be relevant
2. do something with this life
3. have purpose
4. feel loved
5. find happiness

is pointless.

f
    a
         l
              l
                   i
                        n
                               g
              

                                                                                  *as you are walking away

i don't want this anymore, it begins
I've lost count how many times it has played.
The day just started but I must have gone through the whole album thrice.
Her smile flashes in my mind. Its only a split second but the tears are already pouring
Why does this keep happening?

There are three notifications on my phone, maybe, that will keep my mind distracted. The first message is from my teacher he needs my palette by today and I can't afford missing another deadline. The next is a spam message selling me a car for 5k a month, I delete it immediately.
And then I stop, my heart skips a beat.
For a moment, I thought it was her number.
Why would she message me?

I'm still incomplete*, it ends
The song plays for one last time as the sun peaks through the blinds
and I get ready for breakfast and the long day ahead.