I'm laughing.
I don't know. I really need to laugh. Maybe because of the overwhelming sadness? But then I started to sink, slowly, kneeling on the floor. My shoulders shake, from uncontrollably fast to the pace of my beating heart. My hair falls in front of my face, hiding its ashen appearance. I'm torn. Cliché moment, I know. Someone tried to move, maybe to comfort me. My mouth opens before I can stop it.
"Stop. Don't move."
They know me as the girl who's always happy, doesn't get affected by their rudeness, has a lot of patience, and always smiling. It's actually really easy to act happy all the time. But, the sad thing about it is that they will never ever take me seriously. They'll only approach me if they need something. I seriously regret having put a mask on, to hide my true self. My goal was to make the people around me happy. I'm a clown, I guess. Nobody takes a clown seriously. Me, a clown.. a very emotional, pistanthrophobic clown.
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